To have been patronising to the Doctor?

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Sorry, I’ve just read this and it’s long but was very cathartic to write out!!

I have a kidney transplant. I’ve had it for nearly 10 years and was diagnosed with kidney failure after contracting an auto immune disease.

Ive therefore had a LOT of contact with various HCPs over this timeframe and am often taken aback by inappropriate/uneducated comments about it (one RENAL nurse once asked me if my kidneys failed because I ‘ate too much salty foods’ 🙄 .

I was given an emergency appointment this afternoon as I have a painful UTI. I don’t wait to see how these progress but always see GP at first sign as they have travelled to my transplanted kidney before.

Before The appointment I filled in all the online admin about why I was there, what I needed, if I had any conditions etc.

When I went in to see the doctor I started to explain that I’d had some urgency around the toilet. Before I could go any further he interrupted with a ‘let me stop you there…’ and asked me if I was dehydrated, did I do pelvic floor post birth, asked why I had jumped to conclusions that it was a UTI…

I started talking again and explained that I had many before, the feeling was the same … I noticed he wasn’t listening at this point and was looking at his phone. He interrupted again and said he was reluctant to prescribe anything and UTIs can build tolerances…I started to then interrupt him but he put up his hand and went ‘bubububub’ to stop me talking.

He said did I have any pain? I said yes, I was concerned as the pain had travelled up to my kidney and pointed to my pelvis.

He immediately looked very smug and said ‘dear, your kidneys are around your back… i think if the pain is there it may just be your period, or perhaps you pulled a muscle’? He started to stand up and talked about coming back in a week if it hadn’t improved.

At this point I interrupted again and said, in an equally patronising tone ‘dear, you’re right, my non working native kidneys ARE on my back, but my transplanted kidney is at the front and I’m pretty sure I’m at very high risk of hospitalisation if it travels there, which it very much can do as my unrinary tract is shortened’

He spluttered at this point and very abruptly pulled me up for not having mentioned my transplant. I said ‘if you’d have let me finish any one of my sentences or reviewed my notes, you would know this’.

He did end up writing a prescription but tried to have the last word by saying as I walked out ‘next time please do make it very clear you have a transplant’. To which I told him next time to please read the patients notes.

Honestly I’m so sick of being talked over, told what problems might be or even someone trying to tell me (again, GP!!) that I now only had one kidney as I’d had a transplant!!

I despair for anyone who isn’t very well versed in their own conditions and has to navigate these situations and take the word of doctors as gospel!

So AIBU to have replied patronisingly (I NEVER do this and am not quite as quick to quip back as I was today) and should I complain to the practise manager? I don’t know if it’s just the straw that’s broken the camels back!!

and to add, I have some wonderful nurses and doctors on my teams who are amazing which I do recognise!

I haven't had a kidney transplant, but I only have one kidney due to a congenital defect to my reproductive and urinary organs. I mention it at the drs surgery or hospital, whenever I have health problems which I believe will be affected or relevant to this. I am always annoyed when the notes say things like 'according to the patient, she has only one kidney' as if I have made this up or have found out this fact on my own.
I asked about the information's prominence in my notes, as I had an infection which should have warranted antibiotics, but they were reluctant to prescribe. It seems the information is very clear on the first page, but never read. I have found that you have to really advocate for yourself quite aggressively to get the treatment you need. I am not a person to make a fuss, but I have been fobbed off so often, in similar ways to the OP that I have become a termagent!

You had a transplanted kidney you should’ve got to the point at the beginning you wasted his time and your time

You will make better use of that ten minutes if you read the appt specific form which says eg the patient has had a transplant. It's a false time economy to not read even the basic appointment form or the most recent notes.

As per the dentist comments on the thread - most medical systems are designed to allow for red flags or alerts to be set up in patient notes.

If yours doesn’t do this then raise it with the practice as a failing in set up, which needs rectifying in the longer term and general awareness raising in the short term. It both saves you time and improves patient safety.

She DID get to that point at the beginning. She put it in her online form. The whole point of those forms is to save time during the consultation, because the doctor doesn't have to waste time asking the questions on the form. But they depend on the doctor actually spending a few seconds scanning them.

It is entirely the doctor's fault that time was wasted.

No, he should have read at least the form she filled in for the appointment if not all her notes.

He was there as a doctor, not some god to be appeased. His job as a professional is to look at the info the OP has provided for the session and listen to her as well as ask questions to form a diagnosis.

Er ... no. Re-read my post. Or just carry on telling yourselves that Google is the oracle, keep using antibiotics willy-nilly and see what happens. I'm just the poor sap running sequences on the most deadly diseases known to man. What the fuck would I know?

I have complained three times in 15 years of having two medically unwell children. I should have complained 6 times I think. 15 years of mostly fantastic treatment, but in that time have seen a few classic examples of why people should not have trained as doctors. Each time, I wasn't listened to and a dangerous situation occurred as a result of the first one in particular. If we don't give feedback, these people won't learn to improve their skills.

The Doctor has arrived on the thread! 🙄

I’m finally on a ward and I’ve had an IV dose of antibiotics. Thanks for the well wishes, hoping to get some much needed sleep now

I think that it is a tall order to expect a GP to read what may be extensive notes before a consultation. However, I think it was more th e GPs shitty attitude towards op and the inability to listen and not interrupt that’s the issue here. Surely it’s part of a GPs skill set to help a patient express what the issue is? Often people don’t get to the point immediately, although in OPs case she was trying to do that but kept being interrupted.

I’m nearly always on the side of the medical professional. I know they have an incredibly hard job to do in very little time. However I do think in this case the GP was at fault.

Whilst of course the OP made a good point, the reality is that GPs dont have time to read reams of notes. I always immediately give a very short summary of my rare condition. GPs see many, many time wasters and people who book appointments at the drop of a hat, when lots of ailments clear themselves thanks to wonderful biology.
I agree that some doctors are infuriatingly patronising though.

So you don’t think, as a solicitor, that your new client might be nervous/anxious/ upset about seeing a solicitor for the first time??

I am a medical interpreter, which means I see different patients and different doctors in different healthcare settings every day. In my experience by far the most significant factor in patient health outcomes is the attitude of the doctor. There are plenty of bored, arrogant ones who don't listen to the patient or assume they're an idiot. When you get a good, engaged doctor who treats the patient rather than the data on their computer, you know the future for your patient will be completely different. It's more influential than the waiting lists, equipment and drugs available or the specific circumstances of the patient's condition.

GP records have a summary of important past diagnoses at the top, so it's not unreasonable to expect a doctor to scan these before an appointment which would take about 15 seconds and would show the kidney transplant listed.

I’m so pleased recent posters have joined to tell me how difficult it is for GPs to read through so many notes and years of history for a patient. It hadn’t come up til now. No irony at all in pointing out whilst simultaneously not reading any further OP posts…

Sorry, tiredness breeds sarcasm

This is a bit rich. This is Mumsnet, the PPs can hardly be expected to treat your posts as the oracle either.

What is is that you disagree with though? It does largely concentrate in the bladder, hence not being a particularly suitable antibiotic beyond UTI treatments.

And I haven't taken an antibiotic for years. I think their overprescription, and overuse in agriculture, is a huge issue and a squandering of probably one of the most important medical advances humans have ever made.

No, that's not unreasonable,.as I said in the first paragraph I think he should have read the notes relating to the appointment before you came and I don't think you were in any way unreasonable.

The "however" was in response to posters saying things like "they never read the.bloody notes", I think it can be helpful for people to understand what's going on on the other side too.

Really hope you get well soon.

Ive had to be quite forceful with locum gps a couple of times. Once I had mastitis (3rd baby) and phoned to request antibiotics. The gp was dismissive and suggested it was a stomach bug. I very assertively told him that it wasn’t my first rodeo and that I was on my own overnight with 3 children and asked if he was prepared to write a script or not! He did.

He sounds like he shouldn’t be a doctor! Awful! I think you did very well and he won’t be like that with you again.

I think they DO read the posts but they don't read them properly....Grrrr

The problem is that when you have a serious health condition a lot of things tend to go wrong at once. In OP's case at the very top of her notes should be her transplant and it should be referred to within the notes, undoubtedly as causal or linked to other issues.

I had an embolism and a thyrotoxicosis in the same month at the start of the year. It has been unbelievably hard to get to the bottom of both what caused this, how we get me back to normality and what I need to be keeping an eye on. I have also discovered pernicious anemia in this time and started HRT in order to try to minimise extra things going on such as 5 day migraines. My notes are now extensive, all in the space of 12 months. Yet the Dr yesterday on the phone just wanted to put me on antidepressants. Today in person the Dr has sent me 20min drive away to get a d-dimer because she is worried I may have another PE (am confident I don't and this would be the 5th time I have spent a whole day waiting in A&E only to be sent home with nothing else done). What I would like is a full bloods panel as I think I have an iron deficiency anemia, or if they insist on saying it's my lungs, a CT as a D-dimer and Xray isn't going to give them any idea of the current condition of my lung - I've had 5 chest Xrays this year and none of them discovered my PE or showed that half of my lung wasn't fully functioning. The CT after they sent me home did. I must have inadvertently cost the NHS £££ because they keep doing d-dimers and Xrays. Surely if you have had more than 2 Xrays in the last 3 months after a PE you should be sent for a CT? Doesn't that make sense?

Having to repeat all of this to the doctors every time I go in is impossible, I have to guess what might be connected and hope they've read the notes.

I think the rude doctor wasted his own time actually.

Sleep well and hope you have a speedy recovery, OP.

My finest moment was after my waters had broken and a patronising male consultant said they hadn't, that I'd just peed myself. I sat up indignantly, and in a withering tone that I DID know the difference between my vagina and my urethra, thank you very much!!! He went purple, and his gaggle of medical students tried hard not to laugh.....luckily the rest of the labour and delivery went well and was totally led by lovely midwives.