Rude people in the theatre

[Katrinawaves]

What goes through people’s heads when they behave poorly in the theatre? We go quite regularly but it’s becoming more and more common to have people chat through the performance or arrive late or leave early.

Last night we went to see Punch at the Apollo which is a really emotionally challenging play which relies heavily on the audience investing in the main characters. There was a woman in the row behind us who had dropped her phone just as the play was starting and was loudly asking everyone around her if they had seen it over the top of the actors performing and moving around and craning in her seat. When she finally found her phone she didn’t bother switching it off, so of course mid way through the first act, it rang loudly and then she couldn’t find it again to silence it quickly so she swore loudly and huffed and puffed until she could! After the interval when she got back to her seat, she again chatted loudly to her companion for the first few minutes of the performance.

it’s so rude and disrespectful both to the performers but also to other theatre goers who have paid £150+ for a seat to watch the play not to listen to somebody’s mundane life dramas!

There was even a spoken announcement at the beginning of the show asking people not to talk or eat noisy food and to switch their phone off so in the unlikely event she didn’t know what normal social etiquette requires she was actually told seconds before she started to act like a toddler.

AIBU to think the theatre staff should ask anyone who makes such a disturbance in the first half of a play to leave at the interval as a deterrent to others and to ensure that they don’t spoil the whole play for others.

And how they would reinforce that? I think at a max staff could remind her personally to switch off her phone before the second half but otherwise not much they could do,
It’s very annoying for others though.

YANBU. That was rude and thoughtless behaviour.

On a separate note, I’m stunned by the high price of theatre and concert tickets these days!

She should have been asked to leave. That's appalling.

Also a regular at the theatre, the worst behaviour I've seen is at big shows, so the people (quite obviously tourists) at Charlie and the Chocolate Factory on Xmas eve, in the 8th row of the stalls, all on their phones BOOKING NEW TICKETS FOR THE SAME SHOW after xmas! The attendant spotted them and had a sharp word. I would Hve done, but I had a child on my knee! (and yes I could see what they were doing, they kept leaning in to compare seats!)

The man on his phone under his coat at Hamilton at the front of the Royal Circle, meaning that his companion couldn't see his phone screen but the whole royal circle could see if from behind. On that occasion I waited until the interval and asked him to put his phone away, pointing out it was disturbing us all. They were £180 seats!

I do find it's better at shakespeare, maybe because no one goes who doesn't want to?!

No, they can tell them to leave. I’ve had the misfortune of being in the audience THREE times where this has happened. On each occasion the performers stopped what they were doing, then there was an announcement that the show would stop until they had dealt with the problem. One time I could just hear a woman shrieking that “under no circumstances will I be leaving” but then the audience around her started chanting and she clearly didn’t have a choice. Then a big cheer went up….the show restarted after about 15 minutes. It was a right carry on but sent a clear signal to the audience that they won’t put up with nonsense.

I think that’s the only way.

Warn people at the start that if they don’t turn their phone off, and it makes a noise, or they disturb anyone with it, the play will stop & they’ll be removed without a refund. And then do it.
If people absolutely have to be able to check for messages they should be in the very back row, at one end.

YANBU. Sadly this type of behaviour is to be expected so venues should have the backbone to expel people.

Behaviour at the theatre has definitely deteriorated, but I guess that it's in line with general public behaviour, which is also worse than 20-30 years ago. My partner usually leans towards the annoying person and asks them to stop, but it's possible that one of these days the annoying person will start an argument while the performance is still going on.

I agree with the PP who said that you're only safe if you go to Shakespearean performances, because some people wouldn't want to go.

I'd also advise people never to go to a play featuring someone from Tv or the world of films. The audience, in my experience, couldn't care less about the play, they are just there to look at the famous person 'in the flesh' so to speak. Yes - some people are that idiotic.

The last times (recently) that I went to the theatres here- people were challenged quickly about their phones, by members of staff.
was good to see.

I agree and I can't understand also why people can't manage to go to the theatre or the cinema and watch something without having vast amounts of very loud crisps popcorn sweets on hand. it's so distracting to have someone chomping next to you and I actually hate hearing people eat so it's really spoils the experience for me if I've got somebody next to me doing that.

I used to completely switch my phone off but, for accessibility reasons, I now need to connect to the theatre's access app that links my hearing aids to the mics on stage. I do have the 'do not disturb' function on so calls shouldn't come through and the screen brightness is turned right back. Sometimes I need to discreetly adjust the sound via the app but I put the phone under my coat to do so.

No excuse for what that woman did though.

I’m so with you on this I love musical theatre and in recent years all shows have a message at the beginning reminding people not to sing along as it’s distracting for the performers and audience yet I always seem to be sat in front of the person who has had to much to drink loudly singing along with every number it’s infuriating.

Re: Shakespeare (and behaviour being worse now than it used to be) - I went with my gcse class to watch King Lear and the actor stopped halfway through a scene to tell people in the audience off, and that was more than 20 years ago!

Its low-level disruption that’s the worst as it rarely results in then being asked to leave the theatre and yet its bloody annoying for the audience members immediately surrounding them.
Low level chatter, loud rustles of sweets and wrappers JUST as the show is starting, etc etc.
I think middle aged people have become too used to watching tv and chatting throughout the entire show, that they carry on during a play as if it’s an episode of gogglebox.
I am always surprised in the interval that they look like well to do middle class middle aged people. Why can’t they behave? 🤷🏻‍♀️
I’ll often ask them to be quiet, but frequently they’ll argue back. I will always challenge photo taking though. I tapped the lady in front of me who started videoing Evita in the summer and she had a real go at me in the interval. I told her to try arguing why she should video illegally to an usher.
The only places with zero tolerance are (as mentioned, Shakespeare, the royal ballet and opera, and Cabaret.

I remember someone saying (probably on here) that when someone made a disturbance during Cabaret, the MC gave them a thorough bollocking.

We saw the Producers last week. Yes it’s funny. But the woman in front was shrieking in laughter so loudly and constantly. And then telling her husband why it was so funny. It really was a distraction. She was almost collapsing. I guess you couldn’t police that as it’s ’audience enjoyment’. People’s behaviour is def worse in the big shows. Much better in our local theatre.

Yes, it's rude and makes no sense. Why pay all that for an expensive live performance and ruin it for yourself and everyone around you?

I saw Motown when it was on in the West end. About 10 mins after it started the usher showed a late couple to the seats behind us. They were talking loudly, clattering around with their bags and the woman in particular seemed very drunk. They talked or sang along loudly during the show. Someone shushed them and was told to F off. In the second half the woman fell asleep and missed the rest. Her husband had to shake her awake at the end as she was slumped across the end of the row and no one could get out. She staggered off and we then noticed she'd left her phone on the floor and handed it in.

Similar story a few years later seeing Tina. Loud drunk couple for told off by the usher. The man then fell asleep and snored loudly. We were in the bar during the interval - yes they were having more to drink - and a member of staff came over to remonstrate with them. The man stormed off in a huff. The woman stayed and watched the second half without him (and quietly thank god).

The theatre is bad enough but I was shocked at the behaviour of people at a cathedral carol service two years running. This is an Anglican service of carols and lessons on Christmas Eve. One year I sat near the back and groups of people chatted and laughed throughout the service, including prayers. One woman was on her phone all through. Last year I sat next to a family of grandparents, parents and two children who looked around 9-10. One of the children was playing a noisy game on his phone and the parents looked on fondly. They were up and down going to the toilet during the 45 minute service. They acted like it was a concert. It was so disrespectful.

I think it is all part and parcel of the erosion of standards. A little like people listening to audio without headphones on trains etc. As a society we have become so focussed on our own needs and wants that we just don’t care if we inconvenience or irritate others.

YANBU. It drives me mad.

There was a heated exchange behind us when we went to see Tina in the Summer.
The audience gave a gentle applause when the ushers removed them!

Unfortunately it’s not true that this won’t happen if you are going to see Shakespeare.
some friends bought expensive tickets in Stratford a few weeks ago, an evening performance. A family with a new born baby sat behind them. Unsurprisingly the baby cried through a large part of the first half. No member of staff intervened.
The family left of their own accord at the interval.
Whole experience was ruined, when my friend emailed the theatre the next day she received an abrupt, unapologetic response indicating that the theatre had an all inclusive, family friendly policy and the family would not have been asked to leave.

The worst one I had was someone vaping during a show.

We turned around to tell a man to please stop talking during a comedy show once. He proceeded to make passive aggressive comments towards us throughout the whole show and then followed us afterwards to have a go at us. Apparently we were rude to tell him to be quiet because his girlfriend was pregnant. 🤨 When I pointed out that was irrelevant, he threatened to slap me.

YANBU but, unfortunately, there's no way to enforce that rule. Stewards can politely ask people to leave, but can't physically restrain them or escort them out. If they're the sort of people that ignore publicised rules, they're not going to listen to a steward either.

Yes We had trouble at Stratford with a school group being noisy and on phones. The parents accompanying told us they didn't want to tell their darlings to cease as it would make things worse. Theatre staff admitted afterwards they should have asked them to leave.

At that time (2008) the guidance was that under fives weren't admitted.

We went to see ofah at the haymaker a few years ago

Two ladies behind me had a chat (loudly) about how much they hated ofah on the tv

So why bloody go?

They carried on their chat all the way through the second half

I'd been looking forward to seeing it for months and was totally ruined by these two

I do not understand why you would take a baby to the theatre!