Health visitor kissed my baby

[Bobarino]

The health visitor came earlier this morning to weigh my 7 week old baby (first baby). As she was passing the baby back to me after weighing him, she kissed him really quickly on his stomach. I didn’t say anything as I was so taken aback - she did it really quickly - but this made me really uncomfortable, we have asked people not to kiss the baby due to illness risk. I also thought she kissed him back of his head when she came earlier in the week but I was overtired and upset at the time so thought I hallucinated it, but my husband was home this time and saw it too. AIBU to feel like this was really inappropriate?

Also, I can’t stop thinking about it and am really worried about it, is there anything I can do to stop him getting ill (or to calm myself down!)

Seems like an over-reaction

It’s hugely unprofessional & they’re in contact with so many babies/children during their working day they could be transmitting anything. I’d raise it with her, but if you feel you can’t just request a new HV. I’d be annoyed if someone familiar to me did that, never mind a stranger regardless of their role. FYI… I’m a Health Visitor. YANBU.

Oh for goodness sake it was a nice gesture that does noone any harm. The baby isn't going to become ill. Take it as the well intentioned act that it was 🙄

Absolute rubbish!

It’s not rubbish. This is just one example.. herpes simplex can also be transmitted by kissing. If you were in a hospital, I imagine you’d be concerned if a health professional went from patient to patient without cleansing their hands in between. Kissing babies, when their immune system is immature, is far from ideal. https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/over-half-of-uk-parents-unaware-of-risk-kissing-poses-to-newborns/

I’m sure your baby will be fine, however what she’s done requires a complaint to the hv service and let them take it from there

So you think it's OK for health professionals to go around kissing babies without the parents consent?

They see the children until they are 5, should they go about kissing 5 year olds as well?

Why stop at health visitors, what about doctors and nurses and dentists, should they be able to randomly kiss children when they feel like it too?

I know it’s unprofessional but it’s kind of lovely that she feels that love towards your baby.
It wasn’t the baby’s face, so risk of infection is very slim.
Honestly I’d let it go. It’s nice that your HV is so caring and clearly loves babies.

Not the same I know, but when a vet is extra affectionate towards my dogs, my heart soars.

There's a certain type of parent whose first response to the tiniest thing going wrong is to complain and make a big stink and demand someone is fired, but if they make a mistake, oh god forbid they should be treated with anything but kid gloves. They will never admit it or apologise and they will play the victim if they are picked up for a mistake. I'd put money there's a lot of those types on here saying "complain".

Sometimes, things do require a complaint. But not every little thing in life that doesn't go according to the rule book is a reason to go nuclear. No wonder children's mental health is so poor if their parents are constantly on edge and raging at the world.

I agree with this. In addition nobody should be kissing anybody without permission. This is 2025 not 1985. We know better now, therefore we do better

I doubt very much the NMC would strike her off for this.

This is ridiculous.

I know I'm quite old so this a long time ago, times change I get that. New HV must be very hands off professional etc.
But I want to share this story.
My HV was very warm, cuddly person, and she would kiss my DC on the head, hands, cheeks, loads of hugs. She also knitted DC a little jumper because they were the sweetest and prettiest baby the HV had ever seen, and such a happy baby, and I was must be doing a good job etc. I have to say as a very young new mum I was delighted and so proud.
A number of years later I saw the HV in the shop and we were talking about DC and time flying. I mentioned the little jumper and how I kept it and it made be feel so proud. HV said I have a little confession. I would give one to every mother and tell her the same thing. And I was so pleased with her kindness and subterfuge, I think I had a little cry because it was such a beautiful thing to do for all the mum's!

People are more neurotic these days

Do they see the kids until they are 5. My DD has a 9 month old. Been seen once at 12 days

What a lovely story ❤

@Spidey66i doubt it too but it’s not appropriate and is a breach of the code

Yeah fuck that no basic stranger is kissing my baby, I can't believe people think is okay. If a male HV did this it would be an outrage 🙄

Sadly times have moved on. I can’t believe the things that people get worked up about with their babies and children nowadays.

Do you not think some of the issues of so many anxious children who struggle socially comes from the experience they're having early in life in this generation?
Family life has become more and more insular and restricted, and then we expect children at 4 to happily go off to school and be confident with unfamiliar people away from their parents, after their first few years often being limited or fleeting superficial contact with anyone but their parents.

Unfortunately, fuelled by the internet and SM.

Babies need physical contact and affection

I really find it horrific that you are mixing up a gentle kiss for a child with potential sexual abuse

once a child is old enough to say no then that should be respected but really this is so sad

The whole not kissing baby thing is recent and really weird!

Where does it mention sexual abuse??

I’m assuming reference to the poster who said it wouldn’t be accepted from a male HV.