Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

[Dramatic]

My daughter is in year 11 and a lot of her friends have already started shopping or already bought their prom dresses. Some have spent hundreds (£350-£500) and their parents have actually taken out payment plans or loans to get them....this seems insane to me? Are shops just ripping people off? Just seems like a ridiculous amount of money for a dress to be worn for a couple of hours.

When I got my 18yo her prom dress we went to an ex display shop and paid around £50 for a gorgeous dress.

I’d never spend that on a prom dress.

I think DD’s dress was a few hundred, can’t remember, but it was a dedicated prom dress place that had a list of schools so as not to sell the same dress in the same colour to the same prom…it was a pleasant afternoon out with her and a friend, and frankly I’ve spent more on stuff neither of us have enjoyed as much so horses for courses really!
I’d planned she could wear the same frock for end of A levels ball, but oh no, couldn't possibly, so that was another shopping trip! 😂

Surely this post proves that people with money and education do spend a lot of prom.

My kids comprehensive in a nice area had plenty of expensive prom dresses as well. I'll hold my hand up here as well, I spent approx £500 each on my two DDs for dress, hair etc. And we are the mythical MN household with a six figure income and multiple degrees from old universities. They wanted it and I can afford it so I bought it for them (and I still have loads of savings as well). Sixth form leavers event isn't as big a do and University depends on the Uni, I went to lots of balls but some of my friends who went to other Unis didn't. So even for my kids it was a big deal.

There are plenty gorgeous dresses for rent or on Vinted if parents don't want to buy an expensive new dress. My DC already know the joys of Vinted and I'm sure the next ball they go to they'll either rewear their prom dress or budget according to their own income.

Oh, and proms aren't heteronormative, the kids go in groups of friends, not as male/female couples.

This is a weird thread with lots of prejudices coming out.

I didn’t originally plan to buy an expensive dress but then once she tried some on and had her heart set on one of them I did pay £425 + £90 alterations. I wanted her to feel amazing and she had had a tough time at high school but had worked really hard on her GCSEs. She is very slim so would struggle to fit in many of the second hand dresses. We didn’t pay for make up, hair or limos. The pictures are lovely for me to look back on! Prom is a big thing to the kids and I remembered I’d hardly spent any money on school trips etc due to covid. Her cohort had really not had the best time at school. I don’t think anyone should judge as it’s down to personal choice and how we choose to spend our money on our kids.

I didnt have a prom, went to a college with no event , didnt go to uni.

I bought my DDs prom dress at an expense much greater than I normally would because I had a decent amount of money for the first time in my life and wanted to treat her. She looked amazing and it was the only extravagant thing I used inheritance money for. Im donating the dress to a charity so hopefully it will get another wear

I didn't buy an expensive dress but one DD2 liked. However on the day of the prom the girls all metup to get ready at a friend's house and she ended up borrowing a dress from said friend and wearing that instead. We sold the dress the following year

@JaninaDuszejko Absolutely. I have no need to live my life through any of my DC in any way, shape or form. She just wanted something rather dramatic and unusual and it cost money we have so there was no reason not to.

On the other hand I was happy to spend on dd’s prom dress and let her have the experience of being pampered and prepped for the day so that she doesn’t get too over excited about the wedding dress and day rather than the marriage.

They wanted it and I can afford it so I bought it for them (and I still have loads of savings as well).

@JaninaDuszejko This is always my philosophy.

That’s quite an interesting thought process to go through when buying a dress for a 16y schoolgirl!

Why?
Why can't you just accept the fact people can spend their own money how they choose even if it's not something you would spend money on?

I have a boy who I will struggle to get out of his joggers for prom, but yes £££ on a dress, shoes, hair, make up, limos, etc is very normal at our school.
Fairly mixed WC/MC state school.

Must admit for this kind of thing I’m glad I’ve only got a DS, and he wasn’t sure until the last minute whether he wanted to go. We bought a suit from Next, job done. But it must be so difficult, particularly if someone’s DD has friends who are better off and having all the works. I guess with vinted, not only is there the option to buy second hand, but that they can be sold on again.

We had a leavers formal at the end of 6th form in 1987.

Lol one of the school proms were in the golf club nearby. The other was at Boreham house which is a lovely listed building

What about after O level? I didn't have anything like that in 87 after O levels

What about after O level? I didn't have anything like that in 87 after O levels

Guilty! £375 on her dress, £80 on hair and makeup luckily had a friend with a vintage car. I left school in 1998 my dress cost £80 and I did my hair and makeup myself- unfortunately it's how it is now, was I happy about spending all that money no but my daughter looked stunning and had a wonderful time and has been left with amazing memories so it was worth it. One more daughter to go and 3 sons! Xxx

We had a post gcse party in the mid 1990s which wasnt very formal - my mum insisted I should wear "a nice dress" because everyone else would be, (i didnt) they weren't, it was fairly mixed but a prom dress would have been ott for the event. She died when DD was very young, but I did think of her when we got a very nice, (but v £££) dress for DD for prom, she'd have loved it.

Of course I accept it! I just think it’s unusual to buy your child an OTT prom dress in order to put her off making a fuss over her wedding in the future. But perhaps lots of parents have that rationale, what do I know ;-)

I did after my GCSE,s in 1990,so did my sister who must be a year younger than you,as she was in the first cohort to sit GCSE,s rather than Olevels in 1988

Yeah I scraped into doing O levels. 3 days younger and Id have been gcse year lol. Maybe it was the miserable nuns at our school disapproved on idea of prom

We didn't call it a prom but we did have a sit down meal in a local restaurant with a disco after and everyone had a new outfit and the girls had a fresh perm🤣
I think we were allowed a glass of wine.

There is definitely not the case at DD’s school. I have a graduate degree and a professional job and have just spent £500 on a dress for DD’s prom. I would say that at least two thirds of her friend group have already bought similar priced dresses and I can’t think of many of the parents who don’t have a degree.

I don’t regret spending it for a second. We can afford it and despite my scepticism when we went to try them on, it was a lovely experience. We took my very elderly relative who adores dd and tried dresses on for an hour. The shop assistants made a massive fuss of both 16 year old dd and 95 year old relative and they both left absolutely beaming. Do I know they were making a massive fuss to make a sale? Absolutely. Do I care after seeing them both so happy? Nope.

Surely it’s not hard for people to understand that different people place value on different things? I don’t like wine and so can’t imagine paying hundreds of pounds for a vintage bottle of wine when it’s gone in a few glasses. I don’t begrudge or ridicule people who enjoy doing it though because each to their own 🤷‍♀️

Neither did we, neither does DS school end of Y13 only