Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

[Dramatic]

My daughter is in year 11 and a lot of her friends have already started shopping or already bought their prom dresses. Some have spent hundreds (£350-£500) and their parents have actually taken out payment plans or loans to get them....this seems insane to me? Are shops just ripping people off? Just seems like a ridiculous amount of money for a dress to be worn for a couple of hours.

When I got my 18yo her prom dress we went to an ex display shop and paid around £50 for a gorgeous dress.

If you have the money, then why not. Mine was 2200 in 2006. Plus additional shoes, bag, professional makeup, hair, limo, all the shebang. Wealthy parent. It was fun and I wouldn't change anything and neither would my dad. It was certainly not a lot of money for him.

I hate this 'oh, but you can find it cheaper, even cheaper, the cheapest, just scrounge it from the bin'. One thing is when you can't afford it. But if you can - then why not? Surely that can be adapted to adults to, not just teens. What's your 'thing'? Bags, jewellery, clothing, cars, holidays, city breaks, books, gigs, theatre, fancy food, skincare, horses, other hobbies/experiences/stuff? Just do them on the cheap, or don't do it at all? So instead Maldives stay in a hostel in Scunthorpe?

Going into debt or spending way above your means is silly, of course. But if you can afford it - go for it, don't skimp, don't be a miser, it's your kid. It's a once in the life occasion.

The budget for my granddaughter’s prom outfit was £150. We ended up getting a gorgeous dress in Quiz - sale rack - for £35. She initially only tried it on because she wanted to see how the colour looked on her. She loved it, so we bought it. The alterations to make it fit cost £50 - it had lots of beads and sequins to deal with. Even with shoes, bag and jewellery, we came in under budget.

Yes my dd was in year 11 last year. We spent £250 including alterations. Shoes and hair on top of that. I was happy to do so as year 11 was so stressful for her and she studied so hard for her gcses. Should there be another one in year 13 she has the dress and I will not buy a new one.

My daughter felt extravagance for both her Yr11 and 13 proms wasteful as hates over consumerism so was great for my budget and stress levels

I did find the £ that can be spent over the top tbh as my daughtersYr11 prom finished 10pm Yr13 10.30pm so definately not worth spending excessively as could end up being a big build up and then a bit of a let down was my thoughts. It’s seemed to me that the after party/hanging out together was the big thing more than the school organised prom and then they get changed to be more comfortable as can’t tolerate the heels/long dresses for long 😂😂 deffo try not to spend loads is my thoughts from our prom experiences . My daughter had brilliant time btw at both her proms with hardly any money spent

Yes. My DC's "main" school starts at Year 9, with the prep finishing at year 8. This means there is the equiv of a prom for year 8 leavers. We had a dress made for our DD at the cost of £800 by a designer who has done outfits for me. Worth every penny and as we got darts in the side of the dress she will be able to wear it repeatedly because as she grows it can be taken out.

I think dd's was about £70 - no alterations, shoes & bag from New Look, did her own make-up and I dropped her off. Nothing to prove, no trauma to overcome, never wore any of it again - no big deal. No one talked about anyone's dresses, they just had a nice time.

My daughter had her prom in the summer but wasn’t going to go until weeks before. I got her a dress off Vinted for £12.50 and it cost about £30 to have it taken up. It’s the sort of dress she can wear again to a formal event. I would not ever spends hundreds on a dress, I didn’t spend that much on my wedding dress!

Nah, at uni we went to two or three a year. We used to swap dresses and throw them in the washing machine after. It’s just a party at the end of the day. It’s mad that some people are paying wedding dress prices but what the heck - if you can afford it fill your boots.

Ha yes ours were in joggers and hoodies in a field by 11pm for an all night after party.. Made me even more glad I hadn’t spent so much for 4hrs wear!!! Our Yr13 event is a black tie dinner and I know they’ll be in even “sleeker” dresses by then so definitely no hope of a second wear!

Our Local Secondary schools have a 'loan scheme'. They asked for donations of prom dresses and accumulated many before setting up the scheme. The hire, I understand, is just enough to cover cost of laundering / dry cleaning. Given the cost of Prom tickets anyway, this has proved a great success.

Just avoid Stacees or similar online dress retailers. They look cheap but arr based in Hong Kong and don't follow UK distance selling regulations, you'll never get your money back if they don't fit, and the quality often is nothing like the photos. I'd rather support a local dress shop , but as others have pointed out there are vinted and high street options

Just avoid Stacees or similar online dress retailers. They look cheap but are based in Hong Kong and don't follow UK distance selling regulations, you'll never get your money back if they don't fit, and the quality often is nothing like the photos. I'd rather support a local dress shop , but as others have pointed out there are vinted and high street options that are much cheaper

Hear, hear! It was just creeping in when my DD was that age. She didn't want to go as she ' didn't want to dress iup like a twat' & thought the idea was 'shit'. Complete waste of money - I've known people go into debt. In America, the kids are 2 years older, more appropriate.

I bet she won't, though.
I know it's your money, but when so many people in this country can't afford to eat properly and heat their homes the idea of anyone spending that much on a dress for a child feels a bit gross.

@MadameTwoSwords actually she already has use of it planned for another function. And yes, you are right that unless we have slipped into a communist state it is absolutely my money.

Once in a lifetime event? Get grip people. It’s a party. There will be loads of parties

Not a mug, that’s the going rate for prom dresses these days. I paid £300 plus £30 for alterations last year and £350 plus £50 alterations this year. All my two daughters’ friends paid the same, you can buy an off the peg dress from the high street but for a lot of kids prom is such a huge event they want to feel special. I’m not flush but I don’t regret a penny seeing how my girls looked and how happy they were.

I did - then Covid hit and it was never worn and younger daughter didn’t like it so we ended up donating it. There are so many great rental sites now (By Rotation etc) I would do that now

I paid £285 a couple of years ago but it’s definitely a dress that can be used again in fact even I would wear it to an event

You are completely bonkers. Other than that, I’m speechless.

My kids were before Vinted. With my first we left it too late for sales and found nothing on eBay so had a dress made £80 and she hated it 🤦‍♀️ second dd spent £130 on a sale/ex display dress she loved. Now id be straight on Vinted.

Yes I have it looked stunning on my daughter. As long as the kids are happy with how the dress looks and makes them feel and you can afford it. It shouldn't matter what you spend whether that's nothing or £500.

@CoffeeCantata why? I just answered the question asked? I didn’t need to take out a loan or payment plan and it’s my money. As I have said before, unless we have now slipped into a communist state it’s my choice what I do with it.

Of course. I’m not suggesting otherwise, but this is a discussion and we’re all freely and frankly exchanging views!

To me it’s not just about money - it’s about buying into a hype - and starting the whole ‘girls have a duty to look decorative’ idea; and as a pp said you ‘need ‘ to get nails, hair, makeup etc etc all done to a high standard to be socially acceptable. That’s what I find pernicious.

I love clothes and I like to look good but I absolutely don’t think that’s the same as spending loadsamoney and having professional makeup etc done. I don’t like the obvious made-up look or fancy manicures and I don’t think this look is the only one which young women should be pushed into.

@CoffeeCantata My daughter’s interests couldn’t be further away from the hype of endless makeup and looking pretty. And this was an evening that she could chose her own gown etc and we could facilitate that. No regrets.