Do people really think their friends don’t notice re-gifted toiletries?

[MoustachaNatasha]

I know this will sound ungrateful, and I know the obvious answers are “just stop doing gifts,” “be glad you got anything at all,” or “maybe that’s all they can afford.” I get all of that, but that’s not really my question.
I always put thought into gifts I think my friends will genuinely like, but every year I seem to receive a random mix of toiletries or odds and ends that I can’t use, and feel too embarrassed to re-gift. Some of them are literally the free gifts you get when buying full sizes. They go straight into a cupboard and today I’m bagging them up to donate to my DD’s Christmas fair. It even crossed my mind that I’ll probably end up receiving something back from there in the next round of gifts.
So my actual question is: if you re-gift toiletries, do you honestly believe the recipient won’t notice, or do you just not care if they do?
Genuinely curious how others see this.

The only thing we ever regift is an awful knitted bottle cover that gets passed from family member to member each year (on a bottle of course)

@MoominMai , I think we have the same friend 😉

I hope you gave it back to her!

I have a January birthday. Since I’ve was about 10, a good proportion of my birthday presents from friends and more distant relatives were evidently regifted Christmas presents, most of them toiletries. I remember when I was about 15 being really hopeful that I might get some Boots Natural Collection or Body Shop toiletries and being disappointed when yet again I had opened a M&S ‘Royal Jelly’ gift set.

I regift most toiletries as I try to avoid triggering my eczema. They would be an extra Xmas stocking present rather than a main or the only gift.

I was once given a used Lidl hand cream (in a tatty box) & an unwanted chocolate bar by my sister in law. I had always made an effort to give her something usable or decent but she has always given shit gifts - used, unwanted, unwearable. Im beginning to think now she was doing it on purpose - messed up as that seems.
I stopped the gift exchange from that moment on. Freedom.

🤣🤣🤣

Going to the Christmas fair next week I have:
Baylis & Harding handwash and hand lotion, not same range - gifted to me in a tatty paper gift bag under the guise of 'self care' (friend actually said this)
A hideous sequin pouch that was a free gift from one of the high street make up brands quite a while back, with three travel sized Sanctuary bottles that don't really go with one another
An old Oliver Bonas eau de parfum in a tatty box
a set of 4 tinned candles in a transparent box that's scratched and battered x 2 (same friend gave this to me two years in a row. This person is a primary school teacher)
A raffia bag that I actually saw my friend use.
A scented christmas candle (that never had any scent when gifted to me as it was clearly old)

Last week I was also given a box of chocolates from M&S but when I opened the box, 90% of the chocolates had completely melted and fused dry with one another, so I imagine this is another re-gift that's been left lying around for a while.

Honestly it feels really crappy and like I'm not worth the effort. Stop doing it.

@Zippedydodah do you think it's out of embarrassment? You sound well rid!

I know someone who got given (in a Secret Santa style thing) - a satin purse. Inside the purse was a tube of foot cream, already opened. In the little pocket was a filled in appointment card for a podiatrist!!!! 🤣 🤣 🤣

God I can still remember the stench of that horrible stuff! My aunt bought me Boots Royal Jelly stuff for years as part of the Boots 3 for 2 Xmas promotion and it always went to the charity shop.

I had an out of date tin of biscuits and a Christmas themed set of hand creams from one of my relations for my birthday this year, which is in the summer. Very thoughtful!

Occasionally if I am doing a gift bag for my mum or best friend I buy mostly things I know they will like, but might add in a nice regift item too (I only keep the nice things and donate the others to charity).

I dont often regift but last year I did give a Christmas themed nightlife holder in to the cancer group I go to - they always have a raffle at each meeting and I usually give a potted plant or sone chocolates in for a prize (everyone gives something in for the raffle) -this time I remembered the nightlight holdervthat my DF gave me 2/3 Christmases ago that I don't like (apologies) and will never use - recipient loves it

I have had something I bought for someone re-gifted back to me! Which I thought was quite funny! And it was a brand that I know they like and use, but maybe had no need for it. I didn't say anything, obviously, but I do think that if you're going to re-gift something, just make a note of who gave it to you in the first place!

I did used to re-gift myself (only really nice things) if I didn't particularly need it. But now I tend to keep things and enjoy them, rather than passing them on. If it's something I won't use, I give to a local charity shop.

Toiletry sets are the shittest gift ever unless its a specific brand the person likes. They usually sit in a drawer for a year then end up on a tombola. I don't think there is anything wrong with regifting aslong as its to a person who has no relationship with the original giver. I bet their are babyliss and harding sets that have been travelling around families and friendship groups for years.

This is literally how I do Christmas for the adults in my family 😆 I mean, I do take account of sizing/gender/preferences. But we clearly all do this in our family and I don’t mind the same thing back.

It seems like the issue is that they are poor quality crappy and sometimes used gifts.

If that re-gifted list had been (all in perfect, just out of the shop condition) Neom candle, l’Occitane gift set, bottle of Bolly, White Company cashmere robe, Fortnum and Mason hamper, Liberty silk scarf … would they all also be on their way to the Christmas fair on principle?

I think regifting is fine if it’s done well.

Ironically the only person I know who does this is also the richest person I know.

I actively prefer regifts. I don't want gifts, I buy whatever I need and I'm not into loads of crap for every occasion. We really need to stop buying so much. I'm very happy with a regift because I can get rid of it (by regifting or giving away etc.) without any guilt

If people are going to dig into the re-gifting pile, make sure it isn't for a close friend, especially one that will make the effort for you, fine for a random neighbour or lollipop lady.
I like to put some effort into buying a gift.

@ElizabethsTailor, no, admittedly they wouldn’t be. I’m not in love with regifting as I’d rather feel like I’d been thought of, but if it were Neom or White Company then it would definitely take the sting off. The reality is it’s never that, it’s always the random, low-end stuff that just screams “cupboard clear-out,” and not things I’d even buy as everyday basics.

I get a big bag of stuff every year from MIL and I would lay money down that it's all regifted (she works in a school). Got a white wine two years ago from 2011, it had changed colour!

Agree...see how long you can keep it going 🤣