To think most 5AA and 4AA rated embryos are boys?

[wanttobegirlmum]

I live in a country where it’s not possible to find out the gender of the embryos before transferring, like it’s possible in the USA for example, although we’ve done PGTA genetic testing. For personal reasons it is likely that the next successful embryo transfer (if we are lucky enough to have a successful one) would be our last baby. I really strongly have a preference towards a girl but our clinic doesn’t let us select embryos. This time I asked to go for a lower graded one, we went for the top graded one anyway because they missed / ignored my request, maybe didn’t pass it onto the embryologist who was defrosting, I don’t know. The next embryo we would go for a 5AA day 6, although they say that it was ready for PGTA only at day 6 but was a blastocyst by day 5. That’s most likely a boy, right? The next one down is 4AA day 6. I’d rather go for our 5BA or even 4BB as I’ve heard more chance of girls with lower grades. Is there any way I can insist on going for a lower graded one? In your experience were your higher rated embryos boys?

WTF

Yes, I would think most 5AA and 4AA embryos are boys.

I have no idea about any of this but am interested why the assumption is 'lower grade' embryo would be a girl? What is the grading based on?

If you understand the post can you translate?

It sounds interesting but I don’t understand at all!

The OP would rather use a lower quality embryo for her IVF than faced with the horror of having a baby boy.

It's a new version of the gender disappointment threads, I'll give you that OP.

I don’t know his grading but DS was a da 5 hatching blastocyst and the embryologist said he was very good quality and he would be very surprised if he didn’t implant.
Obviously he did implant and is now 13.
However I would definitely go for the best embryo you get, because a baby is better than no baby and boys are lovely.
I actually wanted a girl but would not want to live in a world without my DS, he is amazing.

I asked chat gpt, apparently male embryos develop a little faster early on, so the higher ‘grades’ are more likely to be boys.

You need to give your head a wobble

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing I believe that male embryos develop faster, which tends to mean they have a higher grading when it comes to IVF (where there's more likelihood of successful embryos because of how developed they are). There's a statistically higher rate of male births through IVF rather than in the general population.

But as to the OP, I'd be hoping for a successful pregnancy rather than worrying about their gender.

@JustHereWithMyPopcorn
it’s something like statistically male embryos tend to develop faster than female embryos, and (I think?) on average have a higher grade compared to female embryos. But I’m asking whether this translates to people’s experience or just a statistical thing, let’s say it’s 51% boys vs 49% girls, that actually makes very little difference in practice

Why do you have a preference for a girl?

I'm with the "give your head a wobble" poster.

As someone who had four IVF miscarriages I just cannot comprehend the gender disappointment mindset.

This.
What the actual fuck.

Thirded.

@BilingualDoggo
despite being a strong reason, they don’t allow testing for gender in my country for any reason. So the reason doesn’t play a difference.

How about you just wish for a healthy baby? Too old fashioned?

I don't know the technical answer OP. But it seems you are saying that actually you are wanting to avoid the IVF bias towards boys, rather than activity select a girl? That seems fair. Effectively you're being offered an embryo which is almost certainly a boy, and you'd rather more balanced odds, like everyone who conceives naturally? If that's the case I think you're getting an unfairly hard time here.

But you're setting yourself up for failure. Be deliberately selecting a lower grade embryo, you're putting yourself through it all for a greater risk of no baby at all. Is it worth it?

My 4AA is a girl. I just wanted a healthy baby and the clinic selected which embryo would be transferred.

Ffs. I'm 2.5 years into ttc a sibling. 2 failed FETs and 4 blastocysts left. This is the most insensitive and offensive thing I have read. Those embryos aren't a selection box of chocolates where you pick your favourite. Any child is a blessing. I would just want one to implant

Is that true because literally everyone I know who had IVF or other fertility assistance had a girl? How heavy is the bias?

I think a healthy baby has to come first. And a viable pregnancy.

If you'd rather have no baby than a boy, don't do it.

You’re right according to my research, I have a 5AB son. I found a paper which said

“A total of 72% of blastocysts attaining the highest morphologic scores (5AA and 6AA) were found to be male, compared with only 40% of grade 3 embryos”

What was the strong reason? You want a girl?

Think AAs have a approx 60% chance of being a boy, overall IVF is skewed towards boys at a 55% rate so not that significant. I honestly think give yourself the best odds possible! I know someone who had 4 boys from one embryo collection at all different grades.

Also - I overall do not understand gender disappointment (after MANY miscarriages it seems unfathomable to care) but I don’t think it’s fair to say OP shouldn’t experience it because it’s IVF. I’ve had so many people say I shouldn’t find aspects of parenting hard because I did IVF ( eg ‘oooo don’t complain about sleep deprivation, remember how much you wanted this!’ Etc etc) and it’s grating.

Gender disappointment stuff aside this is really interesting!