Things you wouldn't admit to in real life

[TwinklyFawn]

Light hearted. I dislike my mum's boyfriend. I am sick of his constant grunting when i ask him a question. It is like he is incapable of saying yes or no to a simple question. He is a terrible bus driver. He drives like he is on a race track.

My dad is quite serverely autistic, I have pretty pronounced autistic traits and I used to assess children for autism as part of a research project. While I understand that getting a diagnosis of autism can be clarifying and allow a child to access help, I'm really not sure what a diagnosis does for an adult or child who is generally doing well but has difficulty in some areas. My DS has autistic traits - he stims, he obsesses, he has some difficulty socially - and he said he was ND and might want a diagnosis (he's a teen). I just said he's like everyone else in my family, he has these traits, some are a bit difficult to deal with but I can help and a diagnosis won't make any difference. I think there is a serious problem with people getting a diagnosis then basically hiding behind that for the rest of their lives. It's limiting and also very annoying to be on the receiving end.

My adult children give me no joy.

Not my child, not my problem, but yes this is my private opinion.

MMm I am not so sure.

I know someone who is ill, but nowhere near as ill as she says. It has been an ongoing theme all her life, I have lost count of the times I have taken her to hospital and she has mysteriously improved when invasive tests have been mooted. Now retired she gets PIP, has a blue badge and assistance at the airports with her whole family. Her life is one long hospital appointment and she enjoys her ill health.

With regard to your comments about house buying, again, I disagree, all of my young adult kids are on the property ladder and have been since they were relatively young. They saved and in a couple of years had enough for a deposit.They didn't all start out as high earners either, they just prioritised saving. IRL I just smile and sympathise, but my kids can't be unique.

@HappyNewTaxYear. Simply 50% or more of the patients did not have POTS as evidenced by objective specific diagnostic tests. This news was never well received by pt or her dmum/ dad.

and it’s a young health care recipient who may incorrectly interpret your facial expression or words and be upset with you the messenger when it’s the message they are unhappy with

@youalright You can test negative (meaning no evidence) of POTS based on multiple objective tests and still be very unhappy you are unable to be diagnosed with POTS So where many people would be happy their biopsy is negative or their echocardiogram is normal most POTS pts are not happy to be “negative. And over 50% do not meet objective criteria irregardless of their subjective symptoms

Never implied it was your problem

Just pointing out the arrogance to think you know better than a child psychiatrist re an autism diagnosis 🤷‍♀️

Being 'in love' is a transitory thing and also no preparation for marriage or long term living together. I loved my second husband. I fell in love with my first - we got divorced because when the shiny lovey thing was done it turned out we didn't like each other much (I don't think he liked me at all and he hated my w/c family). Second husband much, much better and now much missed.
Thing I can't say in public: I am bitter that my ex-husband is still alive and has survived several heart attacks (at least 2 with my help) whilst my second husband died suddenly of a cardiac arrest and there was no way to save him.

Or they have naturally small appetites, or are uninterested in food or eating, or have a condition or illness they don't wish to share....
What you say about slim people deliberately rationing what they eat may be true for some but definitely not all.
And the attempt at an analogy with sporting cheats reads as nothing more than an excuse for a return to fat shaming. It's almost as if you're jealous of formerly fat people who are now thinner due to WLIs. Odd.

I think FND is made-up nonsense, the fashionable ‘unexplainable’ illness du jour and is often suffered by those who buy funky resin walking canes as a fashion accessory and are questioning their gender identity. <Ducks for cover>

I effing hate where I live. The people are beneath me and I’m ashamed every day at the choices I made many many years ago.

Glad to know both my DC are malingerers with made up illnesses. One with an FND diagnosis, and one with a MH condition. I wonder why both are choosing to live incredibly restricted, and in one case painful, lives rather than just enjoying their 20s?

I kind of get this. You have a child who has a physical problem that has a wide spectrum of symptoms. You are referred for an assessment and are hoping that this will be the beginning of getting a diagnosis, treatment actual HELP and are then told that the assessments say nope its not that. I could see that would make patients and parents unhappy same as in any other circumstances where a suspected illness cannot be confirmed by assessment.

@TwinklyFawn
I am sorry that you did not have a happy relationship with your parents but I think it’s a bit unfair to project that onto @LoveWine123who was only trying to help you.

You see - this in itself had annoyed me. So you're not actually mute - just attention seeking. That's annoying and things like this annoy me. Just grow up and speak.

Did they buy in London??

I make myself cum most mornings in the shower while my DH lies in bed the other side of the wall, it’s my secret daily treat. It sets me up for the day!

Ooooh what do you know: I’m intrigued

I understand what you're saying but my diagnosis made me feel so much better about myself.

I had always felt that there was something wrong with me, that I was 'wrong' for not enjoying social occasions, and that I had to have a couple of drinks in order to be relaxed enough, even with family.

I wondered how other people could manage to work all day and still be awake enough in the evening to cook, exercise, socialise or even just watch TV.

I wondered why I am so terrible at keeping friends, why I actually have no friends at all from school, university, or previous jobs. Why I have only been to weddings of family members, never been to a hen do or been a bridesmaid. Why I have never had or been a best friend to anyone.

I felt a bit embarrassed about all the little things I did to cope, like rehearsing what I was going to say to people, make endless lists, have routines that I had to stick to, look up images and maps of new places online before going, etc.

So being diagnosed made all that make sense. I am very good at masking with other people, but this leaves me utterly exhausted. I need to go straight to bed when I get home from work. It also made sense of the fact that I used to drink too much when younger in order to cope with nights out. With hindsight I know that I didn't have to go out, but I thought that it was just what everyone did.

And ultimately, I am not a bad person, a horrible, unkind person, a bad friend, bad daughter etc, it's just that my brain works in a different way to other people.

I have been able to forgive myself, and actually feel sympathy for the younger me.

I don't even like his dog.

When a woman gets married in a beautiful white dress and they have big black tattoos down their arms I think it spoils the whole look. Big black tattoos look manly to me.

I can relate to a lot of what you say but I am not on the spectrum. None of those things make me a bad person either. I'm glad your diagnosis makes you feel better about yourself, but you didn't have to feel bad about yourself in the first place, in my opinion.

But I did feel bad, that's my point!

Because obesity is all down to fast food.....

Also what are your stats for obesity rates in various African countries compared to various European ones and the apparently lack of availability / money for fast food outlets in African ones...?

They may not 'literally' starve but it would take an obscene about of mental energy to overcome the biological factors that would push them to eat more.

I mean plenty of smokers quit without Nicotine patches. Doesn't mean those who use them are cheating or just not trying hard enougg.