Inheritance

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Inspired by a currently active thread, surely there must be some MNetters out there who haven't inherited anything from grandparents or parents? DF is still alive - I'm pretty sure DM, who passed away a couple of years ago, left everything to him, and I'm not holding out for any inheritance from DF as I feel it is safer to assume any assets could well be eaten up by care home fees or any unexpected events. I inherited nothing from any grandparents. Yes, you bet I am jealous of those who have been more fortunate than I in this area! Is it just a Mumsnet thing where people expect to, or have received, an inheritance?

I had an inheritance but not from parents and not expected. An aunty with no children passed away and left her house to me and my sister. She lived abroad in a house she owned with 2 family members and the stipulation is that we can do nothing to the house while any named family members are living in it. There was no inheritance tax as such, but a transfer of deeds fee had to be paid as a percentage of the house value. My Aunt was cash poor, so my sister and I are now in some debt due to the property value being high. If we hadn't paid we would have lost the house and made other family members homeless. My parents have no assets and are also cash poor. Due to the age of the family members still living in the home, my sister and I are unlikely to see much benefit but our children should be ok.
Whilst I really appreciate what my aunt did, it has unfortunately left me and my sister financially worse off!

I got £500 from my late DNana and £2000 from the estate of my late DGran, which we put in savings for DS. I expect my parents house to be sold to pay for their care and their money to go on that, and that’s fine with me. I want them having the best care possible and I’d rather they were around to enjoy their lives for decades yet. My DPs have never had much financially anyway.

DH’s parents have earned well and lived in a cheap part of the country but always spent everything on holidays and home renovations. They paid for the boys rent at university, but no house deposit help to us (except a £12k loan) and no help with our weddings etc. though they’ve saved BIL thousands on childcare costs by babysitting two days a week and I expect anything they do have left will go on holidays and their own care when the time comes. And that’s fine, it’s their money and frankly not my business and we’re not entitled to it.

We are saving for our own DCs and going without a bit to ensure we can help with house deposits/weddings/uni costs etc.

That's rather scary, OP. I gather great strides are being made in Alzheimer's research. Perhaps some of us should give some of our inheritance money / savings to the Alzheimer's Society.....

Who are the relatives living in the house? It's nice of you to let them live there.

Everyone expects to have great care in their old age, while having 100ks sitting in the bank and valuable houses. They expect society (ie everyone else) to pay for the care while they pass hundreds of thousands on to their kids.

Of course if anyone proposes raising inheritance tax to pay for this care the same people go berserk.

I have inherited and stand to inherit more, but I find the situation we have today very worrying. People who say 'But it's only right that if you need care, you pay for it yourself if you can afford it' aren't entirely wrong. But equally, it feels wrong that younger generations' financial stability/security of housing is dependent on the double lottery of having parents who have accumulated wealth to pass on and who have avoided health problems that require a care home. Personally, I'd like to see a much higher tax on inheritance, to be put towards the cost of providing decent care for the elderly, and to make access to housing more meritocratic again. People on here say again and again that you can't rely on inheriting because you don't know what will be left after care home fees. Let's just take the uncertainty away and level the playing field a bit.

I’m sorry for your loss, but plenty of people’s parents drop dead far too young without anything to leave. It’s not an either/or.

My paternal grandfather is (was) in Kiiv and there is probably not much left from trying to manage during war. Other grandfather gave everything to his son by second marriage, didn't even mention my mom in his will.

My grandmother is likely to need care, so I don't expect anything.

My other grandmother didn't even pass on her set of bells which I really wanted as a memory from my childhood (not valuable or anything)

It's not a case of letting them live there. It was stipulated in the will that the house cannot be touched as long as they are alive and want to live there.
However, even if it wasn't written in, we absolutely would not have made them move out. We are a very close family and our Aunt died much younger than expected, and no doubt expected to outlive the two relatives living in the house. Unfortunately life is crap sometimes and doesn't go to plan!

I didn't inherit anything from my grandparents, apart from a tea pot and some costume jewellery. My dh has inherited from his parents, who in turn inherited from theirs. Potentially I might inherit something from mine but I don't expect anything. It's their money to do with what they want.

Nothing coming to me and the same for my children.

Both mine and DH's parents were poor and rented. No inheritance from either side, I paid for my parent's funerals. Doing well enough now and able to help our DC buy a property. It pisses me off that everyone I know got a hefty sum and take it for granted.

What really gets up my nose is people (I see it quite a lot) asking how they can protect parents’ assets (house and/or savings) from care costs - in other words, they want to fiddle it so that the taxpayer picks up the tab.

In reality, they don’t seem to realise that investigations into deprivation of assets will be very thorough - anyone who thinks it’s going to be easy is sadly deluded.

Where people get caught out is when they give away the assets or set up a lifetime trust at a time when there is a reasonable expectation that they may need care i.e they don’t do it early enough. Personally I plan to spend as much as I can (I don’t have kids).

This is true.

Part of the reason people get so aggressive about inheritances these days is often it is the only route for them to afford secure housing.

Everyone should be able to afford decent housing without having to inherit in order to do so.

We'll be quite well off when all of my in-laws pass. There won't be anything from my parents.

A friend of mine found out recently that the money left in a signed will to her by her grandmother was taken by her Father. He was the Executor. It wasnt a huge amount (£20k) but he took it all. She only found out after he passed when she was going through paperwork.

Some people dont have any shame or seem to convince themselves THEY deserve it more than you.

I have never received any inheritance, there was no money or assets. Never been a problem. My parents legacy is priceless

Trust me, approaching 70 and dreading putting the heating on or paying for physio isn't much fun.

For most people with ordinary incomes and modest homes, if they live long lives with poor health and need care it seems likely that inheritances will be small or non-existent. For people in that category who do inherit something, it’s likely because their parents died younger than the average. Yes, money is helpful, but losing your parents early is often very challenging for a number of reasons.

Our whole society seems in imminent danger of toppling- only those who inherit will improve their material standing, graduate jobs are being decimated by AI, climate-provoked migration and struggle for resources (usually water) is creating huge problems… the whole thing is a nightmare.

😂 good for you!

Unless your parents have loads of assets the only way to have much left over is to have them live with you instead of a care home. A care home may be needed for the last little bit , if nursing or dementia care is needed but often the early years of care could be done in the family.

Nothing for us, and nothing to come. Dementia and care homes took the lot on both sides, which does not bode well for DH and me. Therefore have got together house deposits (not enough, £25k each) for dcs and handed them over. Not much else we can do except refuse all healthcare screening (ie. cancer) and hope something other than dementia takes us first.

We’re all doomed

My parents never inherited and neither will I or DH. What I have seen is some very toxic behavior from my mother’s sibling where she has orchestrated fall outs to the point where my grandmother has been manipulated into leaving that aunt the sole estate. However my grandmother now needs care but my aunty is refusing to put her in a home (which is what would be best) as she doesn’t what what she is entitled too to be eaten away at. Some aspects of inheritance being about some shocking behaviours.