Inheritance

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Inspired by a currently active thread, surely there must be some MNetters out there who haven't inherited anything from grandparents or parents? DF is still alive - I'm pretty sure DM, who passed away a couple of years ago, left everything to him, and I'm not holding out for any inheritance from DF as I feel it is safer to assume any assets could well be eaten up by care home fees or any unexpected events. I inherited nothing from any grandparents. Yes, you bet I am jealous of those who have been more fortunate than I in this area! Is it just a Mumsnet thing where people expect to, or have received, an inheritance?

Yes, I wonder if the funds could be withdrawn for her by the executor, or op could get an id.

The judge would take that into account when determining entitlement, surely?
Why don’t parents just divide it equally between their children /relatives, unless there is some terrible reason why they wouldn’t ? It would save a lot of heartache and resentment!

This is awful, I'm so so sorry.

I haven’t either!
When dads parents died, they left everything to him and his sister.
My mums mum is still alive but has already said her house is to be split between her 5 children (one of them being my mum, obviously). Neither grandparent left anything in their will for my brother and I.
My parents will leave everything to us, but hopefully that’s a long time off yet!

What do YOU think should have happened? Who should have paid for the care home? You and me the taxpayers?

How can it just be a Mumsnet thing? Mumsnet posters exist in the real world too.

I think there should be something like insurance packages available for care home fees, plus the fees capped, so that children don’t have their inheritance wiped out. The Tories were going to do this and it got kicked into the long grass.

When my grandad died, everything went to my grandma (my other grandad died when I was in primary school and his wife was in her early 50’s so I presume she had everything but he died without a will). She ended up in a care home as extremely depressed without him and didn’t want to be at home alone anymore, and didn’t want to live with any of her children. The care home used up all of their lifesavings and proceeds from the sale of their home. She died about a week after dropping below the savings threshold for the local council to cover her fees. All of the grandchildren got around £2k each in inheritance. Great grandchildren £500 each. I’m not sure if her 2 remaining children (1 of her sons died the year before she did) got anything or if it all went to the grandchildren.

When my last remaining grandparent died, everything was split between her three children. My parents chose to give my sister and I £5k each specifically to use on a family holiday, which we were incredibly grateful for.

But no - no massive inheritances here like you read of so often. No bank of mum and dad helping with house deposit etc either (although they’ve just done that for my sister and they’ll be amending the will to reflect what she’s had as they owned the house she lived in). My millionaire patents didn’t even help me out with tuition fees or textbooks at uni. I’ve just this year (at nearly 46) finished paying off my student loan though so that’s been nice finally.

Im not bitter, just stating the facts so you can see some people don’t have that leg up you see so often happening…. And that just because someone’s parents have money it doesn’t mean they are helping the kids financially.

Unless insurance is compulsory ( I don’t know - like national insurance for example) there will be plenty who want to not spend their own money looking after themselves but still expect someone too

Both my parents have died and didn't have any assets so received no inheritance.

I think a lot of people would take out this type of insurance, plus a cap on care fees would be a fair solution too.

Never had anything from anyone. MIL's assets depleting net of £1K a week for care home fees so doubt anything coming our way from DH's parents.

It makes me roll my eyes when people inherit but then say “but I’d rather have my parents back”. We all rather would, but dead parents and basically a lottery win of £300k is mint compared to dead parents and lumped with a funeral bill 🤣

I got 10k from a great aunt about twenty years ago. God bless her as it paid for a new bathroom when ours was awful.

My inheritance status is zero now.

My parents: loaded (grandparents were very wealthy) but I have been cut out of the will due to calling out my parents’ abuse of me and my now deceased sister. Golden child (who knows the truth) going along with parents’ version as he will inherit everything.

DH’s parents: divorced. Father remarried and left everything to his wife and new family. Husband and his sister got nothing. MIL remarried to a man only ten years older than DH and I. I expect both of them to go on for at least another 2-3 decades by which point (if there is anything left) DH and I would be in our 70s/80s - if we are actually even alive! I guess there might be something left to benefit the grandchildren.

Everyone else I know is looking at 200k plus but it is what it is. I already had bad luck in being born to my parents and that bad luck has followed me in all sorts of ways since my birth. I am not the only one in that position, I’m sure. I’ve tried my best to earn my own money and so far I’m ok.

Good luck to everyone on this thread xxx

Some may mean it, but I bet a lot don’t, especially if they’ve had a terrible life due to them!

Of course not everyone inherits, not even everyone on Mumsnet. Thinking that you 'should' or 'will' inherit is a recipe for misery and resentment.
My mum died young and left me some of her savings and some to my dad. Dad very quickly started another relationship (which was why Mum directly left some money to me; she suspected he would), and at one point he changed his will in favour of his partner. Then they fell out and he changed it back shortly before he died, so I inherited for a second time. But I might easily not have, if he and his partner had made it up, or he'd met someone else, or if he'd needed long term care. People's circumstances and finances can change very quickly, so don't rely on anything.

How?

We live in an inheritocracy. All of my DCs friends have had parental help and/or an inheritance when buying their homes, and in many cases other parental help too.

DD was quite shocked when one of her friend's grandmothers died, and instead of inheriting something she had to travel home and help her Mum clean out the house as the council wanted it back.

Most people move in similar circles and I think those that don't inherit or have parental help probably have a lot less contact with those that do due to lack of funds limiting their life choices.

There’s a lot of luck involved as to whether you get an inheritance. I can understand some being resentful and jealous when they see someone receive a heap of unearned money, enabling them to buy a house, have lovely holidays etc, when they are struggling.

My aunt stole a ruby ring left to me by my grandmother. I always thought she loved me, but greed is a funny thing. It didn't affect my love for her (geographically not close, but i did love my glamorous aunt from afar), but after that, I felt sorry for her. She also stole things that had been left to her own parents. They asked my dad not to contest it. They were right. She lost more than she gained....

Never inherited a penny. My grandparents were poor, my mother died unexpectedly, naturally leaving everything to my dad, and when he remarried, he and his wife made mirror wills. He died a few years later, and she's been syphoning my dad's money to her own son, so I doubt there'll be much left by the time she dies. She hasn't remarried, but I don't think there's anything stopping her making a new will anyway. In short, I don't expect any inheritance.
DH will get one (parents both dead now), albeit a share of a modest estate depleted by care home fees.

You will inherit from your husband if he dies first!

I agree with you @GasPanic l always think of it as if you went off to live in a hotel and expected it to be free. Obviously it must be upsetting when a relative requires expensive care that depletes their funds. That is just the luck of the draw though. I inherited £5000 from an Uncle who was also my Godfather. A lovely man. It was donkeys years ago. I was very grateful as a single parent with bugger all at the time. Only other inheritance was a ten pound note in an envelope my Nan left me when I was sixteen.

It's a more of a mumsnet thing to be furious with anyone who expects an inheritance.

I've inherited my mum's house and that's what she wanted. I'd have been in a mess if she'd had to go into a care home and I know she'd have been very upset if her money had been spent on that. I was absolutely relying on that inheritance - of course I was because at some point I'd have probably ended up homeless if I hadn't inherited. But apparently that's not allowed.

It may be that at some point I'll give my house to my children while I'm still young enough for it not to be deprivation of assets. I want them to have as easy a life as possible especially as one has 'failed to launch'.

My parents are both only children and inherited nicely from their parents. My dad has spent years telling my sister and I that we will be 'well off' and 'lucky' when they die. My sister took this onboard and has never purchased her own home, I on the other hand am a pessimist and fully aware that life likes to throw in nasty curveballs so DH and I purchased our house when younger and have always been financially self sufficient. It has paid off because mum was diagnosed with dementia 8 years ago which is now in the advanced stages, sadly she is soon to go into a care home costing £100k per year and my dad is now showing signs of cognitive decline so who knows what the future will bring but I doubt any money will come our way.

I have never expected or thought I would get any inheritance anyway and it looks as though that will be the case.

When my parents w