To go on holiday without kids?

[Toskiornottoskii]

I want to go skiing. Really as a family. Problem is DP doesn’t ski yet. Kids would be just turned 1 and just turned 4 in spring. So they would just be in ski crèche.

My latest idea is to do a 4 day midweek break. Leave the kids with grandparents. DP can learn how to ski.

This is potentially not the best for 1 yo. But would be heaven for the 4 year old.

If we wait until next year then we have reception/ school to contest with and I feel like we should be at home then as I don’t want grandparents having to get eldest to school.

Is this a bonkers idea?

Of course it isn't, it's a choice to leave your children all the same, just for 2 days less in your case.

Not missing anything - you're openly being a hypocrite.

He didn't notice, because I was meeting all his needs, his tea, his bath, his playtime, his bed time. My husband works away and I work shifts, it was normal for only one of us to be here, it doesn't take 2 people to sort one 4 year old child out.
He didn't notice his dad wasn't there, just as when I was working he didn't notice I wasn't there.
Or are you the type of parent who can't parent on their own and always needs someone at the side of you?

But it's okay when she does it

Just because you are exhausted by having your grandchildren for one night doesn’t mean others are.

What happens if they get sick? Are you saying grandparents who sound involved can’t care for a sick child?

Perhaps, OP should go alone and enjoy some time to herself.

Good thing I don't have small children then.

I don't have small children, so you are openly wrong in your assumption.

Surely leaving children is either selfish or it isn't? When does it magically become selfless to go on a hen do for 2 days?

It doesn't matter. You still chose to leave your kids for your own selfish needs (hen do - very much optional, not "practically obligatory" as you try and claim) and yet you're judging another mum for doing exactly the same thing.

Her children are going to be well looked after, loved and cared for by their grandparents. She's not leaving them at an orphanage or in the care of a drug addled stranger

When you don't have small children. I think I might have said this around 10 times or so now.

I would take your 4yo and do to dry ski slope lessons here first. Leave baby with grandparents, go skiing the 3 of you and, if you can afford it, book a private instructor there for your dp and dd. You’re investing for future amazing winters as a family.

And what's your definition of "small children"?

And when did you leave your kids? Maybe we could all judge you too.

It absolutely does matter. If you think leaving a 1 year old baby for 4 nights is the same as leaving a 16 year old for example, you have an odd way of looking at things.

Do what you want but if DH is in his 30s and has never been skiing, he probably isn't that interested in skiing. My brother thinks like this- he loves skiing so everyone else will. Dragged his wife to Austria only for her to hate it.

I'd rather spend my money on things the whole family can and will enjoy, not something that half will get left behind on and half of the remainder might not enjoy.

Does that mean if you did have small children, you would've turned down this hen do which you claimed was an obligation? Or are you just fortunate it didn't happen when they were younger?

When is a child no longer a small child in your eyes?

Arguably it's worse to leave a 16yo as they know what they're missing out. A one year old doesn't care either way.

Presumably at whatever age this "obligatory" hen do conveniently occurred, lol.

Would I have gone on a hen do with a 1 year old baby and a 4 year old for 2 nights? No.

Ten.

You make a big assumption, you think that the kind of ski holiday you enjoyed will automatically be enjoyed by your family.
What if they hate it, it doesn’t come naturally, you place pressure on them to be good?
There are very few other activities where everyone has to do the same thing all day everyday. If you like different sports from your family you each go and do your own thing. On holiday you can opt to laze, to explore to do water sports.
Skiing holiday, everyone skis.
Can you not just round up some siblings or friends who share your love of ski holidays?

Why? Seems an odd thing to “not like” people doing

But why ten and not nine, or eleven, or twelve?

What changes between 9 and 10?

Ffs this says more about you than other people. I can’t wait until I have grandchildren. I’ll absolutely offer to have them so my kids can have some time on their own and 4 nights sounds the ideal length of time.

Probably jealous u from someone who can't afford ski holidays ( like e but I detest cold and so so don't care) or doesn't have anyone willing to look after kids so the can concentrate on their adult relationship

I don't think kids of any age should be left out of a big family holiday.