To think maybe my NDN is a murderer?

[notanoccultexpert]

Ok, I'm going to try and make this as short as possible, but at the same time, not miss any details out. Lived in our house for 30years - about 16 years ago, a family moved in next door. Mother, Father, 2 sons and 2 daughters (who all appeared to be in their mid-late 30s). 2 daughters drove and worked, 2 sons don't drive and have never worked.

Due to his future behaviour, we nicknamed one of the brothers 'Hulk' (he's also quite stocky), so to make things simple here, we have Hulk and 'Gentle' (his brother).

Incidents when my kids were young:

1. Hulk told me he was keeping a log of when my children made noise in the house
2. Hulk splashed bleach on my ex's car when he parked outside their house for literally a minute whilst picking the kids up
3. Hulk shouted at my young son for knocking to ask for his football, and when I saw him and Gentle next, I had a go at him for it. Gentle was 'holding' his brother back, like he would attack me.

My other neighbours don't like them, THEIR neighbours don't like them.

Over the years though, I got in the habit of saying hello and it became friendly enough. Time passed and the father died, then the mother died, one of the sisters died. I knew all this because they either told me, or, in the case of the sister, they had a big funeral procession, the hearse was parked outside the house for a while, and Gentle told me she died from kidney disease.

ALL through this time, I only EVER saw Hulk out in the garden with Gentle, gardening. Only ever saw Gentle and his sister go to shops, or laundromat. Literally the only time I would see Hulk is if he was with his brother out in the front garden, or gardening in the back garden. None of them go out a lot, but if one of them was walking down the street, it would only ever be Gentle.

Last year my daughter and her partner had a bit of a parking dispute with our other neighbours. They are nice but a bit fussy, and they always asked my daughters partner to move his car when he came over...he never parked outside their house, but they felt like they needed 'more space' for their daughters car. So he would move it, out of courtesy. Until one day he didn't, which resulted in their daughter 'having' to park outside Hulks house (she really didn't need to, plenty of space outside her parents house) - so an argument between them two occurred. A few weeks later, Hulk had asked us about the back yard fence, and we noticed some vines coming through from his side. He denied it, so I opened my back gate to show him. My daughter was also there, as was his sister, and he was stood about a foot away from me (I couldn't back up cos our cat run was behind me). Because he kept rambling, i eventually said, anyway, I've got to get on...and he literally just stood and stared at me, no expression for about 5 seconds....after about the 5th 'I've really got to go', i managed to end the convo and get him the hell out of my yard. Me and my daughter were really weirded out by the way he just stared and ignored me.

But, during this convo, he kept bringing it round to the parking dispute - telling my daughter re our other neighbours 'don't let them dominate you' - not kidding he kept coming back to it, and he must have said this about 6 times...so weird. I mention this because his language was so strange...it was a parking dispute and a small one at that.

So after this strangeness, I realised I hadn't seen Gentle for a very long time. And once I realised it, I started noticing that now only Hulk was doing gardening, and it was only Hulk who went to shops with his sister (they ALWAYS go out together).

And then we (my kids and me) started talking about their back garden. It's not a huge garden, but they already had two sheds side by side at the back. The rest was really lovely flowers. Until Hulk razed the flowers, concreted over and put a massive shed on it. If you look into their garden from our bedroom window, that shed takes up about 70% of the space, then the two sheds at the back as well. There's literally no garden space left, so what he's keeping IN the sheds, no idea.

But where is Gentle? Shed went up after Gentle 'disappeared' because he wasn't helping like he usually would have. I liked Gentle. He would even knock on the door if he needed help with council or anything. I find his brother weird. Now you'd think if Gentle had fallen ill, Hulk would have mentioned it to me during that conversation. The family dynamic is very strange anyway, but I can't stop thinking about what happened to Gentle.

So, what do you think? My kids were saying maybe call the police - but what would I say?

YABU - probably just ill or died
YANBU - he's definitely killed his brother

Definitely agree with your plan to raise your concerns with authorities. Maybe double check with other neighbours to see if anyone’s seen him first?

Please definitely do this!

I had to do a welfare check on neighbours a couple of years ago. I used the webchat service for my county police force. I gave details and my contact details, but you don't have to. The service agent asked me several questions for clarification and I gave answers as best as I could. a police car came out within an hour. I was very impressed by that as a service. Of course, I was never updated with any results, but that is fine. But I am pleased I did the welfare check because less than a year later, neighbours, including myself, were visited by social workers as the gp practice had also reported welfare concerns. So that family is on the radar. Lots of oddity still.

That last line makes me want a 🤣 emoji. It as very “odd” - but i am invested and I want to know more! Bringing the chairs 🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑

I would say that this is a missing person. It's someone whom a next door neighbour hasn't seen for a while, with no explanation of where he is. The police should do a welfare check just to make sure.

Very helpful and informative, thanks. I am a bit worried that he will know it's me...but I can deal with that

You did the right thing OP.

Yep, pretty much that...but no, no smell, no, doesn't go in sheds, the largest shed (the one he built after laying concrete) doors are held together with one of those big clip things - And no they don't look like the kids in Deliverance - haha

Ask where his brother is.

If the family is reclusive with vulnerabilities in some way, it may not be as sinister as murder, although some of the details are interesting - sheds etc.

It could be an overwhelming- for them - scenario such as a deteriorating illness that they haven't sought support for, or even a "natural" death but they can't cope with the fallout, so the authorities are not yet aware, which would be hideous in its own way of course.

At any rate, a welfare check does seem in order - it might get them support they seem to desperately need.

These days nothing would surprise me, and truth is often stranger than fiction I've found.

I think it's really sad that people jump to such negative thoughts. Why on earth assume he's been murdered and buried under the shed??

We have a neighbour that is unusual. He doesn't talk, wears odd clothes, has unusual body language etc. A rumour went round that he was a paedophile and he was attacked. Merely based on his appearance. Poor guy was just a man with learning difficulties doing no harm at all. It took a lot of resources to effectively protect him. All because people's imagination went totally wild.

I suppose police welfare check is one option. But its far more likely the family have mental health/learning or ND issues.

Reminds me a bit of the Wycherley case in Mansfield some years ago - very quiet elderly couple, woman in particular rarely seen and always with the husband, went missing. It turned out years later that they had been murdered and buried in the garden by the daughter and son-in-law who continued to draw pensions etc.

I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt for the moment rather than thinking this is a poor attempt at a murder novel.

I doubt the police can do anything, unless any of your neighbours were on the SS register as being vulnerable. They are not going to believe you if you just rock up and say 'Billy next door hasn't been seen for a while and I think his brother has killed him.'

I think they all sound reclusive and vulnerable and it sounds like the parents took care of them and they all struggled when they died. I wonder if the sister who died didn't get proper medical care and that may be what's happened to gentle.

Why on earth assume he's been murdered and buried under the shed??

Because that’s what happened in Brookside (shed / patio 🤷‍♀️)!

I'd phone for a welfare check. I hope you are wrong. 😔

No one would put it like that. They would make some checks if OP tells them, there's a family of adults with vulnerabilities next door and I haven't seen one of them for a long time.

I would put money on this family being from the same ethnic background as me. Which doesn't make them any more or less likely than anyone else to have murderers in the family, but makes them slightly more likely to have hereditary kidney disease. I would guess that Gentle is indoors with a prolonged end-stage kidney disease.

Agree with you @sunshine244 It's very hard for someone to be ND on its own without all the horrible rumours and judgement over different behaviour. Most murderers are not ND (and can be very charming) though ND non-verbal or learning difficulties are incredibly vulnerable to false accusations.

Or, we’ll see a documentary 6 months from now

I don’t know whether to think of a witty comment to @Whatsthatsheila about borrowing one of her chairs, or to say I also remember the Mansfield case that @Clarinet1 said, and the other case where the parents were wrapped in ?mattresses? during Covid.

Speak to the police though.

I agree - ask for welfare check.

Express your concerns and tell the police what you've noticed.

Don't engage with the neighbours, don't ask where G is. Keep away.

Gosh, sounds like they need some support. Potentially gentle died of natural causes and they didn’t know how to handle it. You have definitely done the right thing OP, if nothing else comes of it at least the family will be flagged up as needing some support.

I cant even begin to find the words after reading this but its completely nuts, to jump to you think the person is murdered is highly unlikely and quite the leap!
Mind your own business OP

I would ask for a welfare check, but I'd probably also install a ring doorbell.