I’m 26, and I’m not saving for a house or planning to move out

[WeCouldBeNice]

And apparently that’s a very unpopular decision amongst certain family members.

I have grown up always listening to my mum and grandmother saying that they regretted not travelling more in their youth. So I’m doing it, before I can have any regrets.

i work a job that pays just under £25k. Moving out would be miserable. I’d exist to pay my bills and nothing more. I am unable to borrow enough to even purchase a flat in my local area. So I’m spending all my money on travelling instead. Short trips. Weekends away and longer European trips next year.

my older brothers are horrified by this (despite both doing it themselves). They think I should be moved out and renting by now.

my dad turned round to them yesterday and asked if they wanted to ever see their daughters struggling and unhappy. They obviously said no, so he asked why they expected that of me. They couldn’t really answer.

theoretically I could take the money I’m putting into my travel savings each month and use it to save for a house. But I’d never get a big enough deposit to allow me to buy anything even anywhere near decent to live in. And I’d then be bound to a mortgage and never be able to do anything other than sit at home.

is it really that bad to do this?

Unless your parents are both in care for several decades, five properties is going to be more than enough to cover care costs and you know it.

Living alone in my mid twenties, and dealing with all that involves- any money worries solely on me, sorting everything to do with rent, bills, things going wrong with the house etc myself, learning how to cope with loneliness- was definitely hard, but has given me so much resilience. I’m mid 40s now and married with 3 children, but that period in my life really taught me true independence. I would have saved more money had I stayed living at home, but I feel that experience I got over those 5 or so years was worth more than money. I will add that this was 20 years ago- and it is much harder for young people to afford even the little place I had back then, so I’m not making light of that. But I do think experiencing living on your own for a while is incredibly powerful, and I’d encourage my children to do this.

As in, if I was actually living with all of these family members, the middle aged Mum becomes the one with all the responsibilities in most cases.

That's very evident from OP, even on this thread.

I’ve lived alone. I enjoyed it and I’m sure I will
again. But it’s not really done much for me, far less than travelling alone has done for me.

You’ve just decided you dislike me because of my situation. You’ve been horribly judgmental of me, and multiple other posters who have adult children living at home.

Are you aware that a certain couple of generations tanked the housing market?

The whole purpose of the thread is that you haven't planned or saved anything for the future. So if you're not relying on inheritance then what are you relying on? Your brother taking pityon you? A rich man finding your experiences of 'travelling around London' and talk of your entry level NHS job irresistible?

So what IS your plan then?

and no one mentioning your younger isn’t misogyny, it’s because you haven’t said how old he is, and your thread isn’t about him

Yes, presumably it is that very fact!

Most people in their later 20s don’t want to be the child in the home set up, they want to be the adult. Even visiting your parents can turn you back into the child for the day (I’ve done it myself even in my 50s!)

OP, I don't see why you can't save for a deposit. You're only 26. Surely you would have enough for a good deposit by, say, the age of 30-32? (Many young people without a partner live at home until that age these days.) At least for a nice one-bed flat?

Having parents who don't mind you living at home is a real gift in terms of saving. I think it's a wasted opportunity to spend it all on travel. You can absolutely be saving for a deposit, especially as I keep reading that we're headed for a big financial crash, which will bring prices down and at least be good for first-time buyers, if no one else.

Don't waste this chance to save.

So how did you manage to live alone before being 26?

I doubt you were choosing between a night out with your mates and paying the rent or a mortgage or putting fuel in the car (which is what many young people do.)
Or calling a plumber to sort out a leak.
Or dealing with a difficult landlord.
Or choosing a new tenant to house-share and trying to rub along with them.
Or worried you might be made redundant and how you could afford the rent or mortgage.

I assume it was your parents who funded that and were a safety net.

If your parents have five properties, aren't they part of the problem? You literally have zero to worry about as your parents cashed in.

Absolutely.

But we are where we are. Blaming the previous generations is not going to let you off the hook about your lack of plans for your future.

Your parents are so rich they could sell one house and give you a leg up.

You could also move out of your deprived area, find a job paying more, and live with other people, on your own or even buy a house.

You don't have to live in the SW or some other run down coastal area forever.

Ah right
So you obviously have very wealthy parents,and they will most probably pass one of the houses on to each of their children
So yes you can afford to piss about and not be responsible, because the bank of mummy and daddy will back you up .
You should of said at the start your parents owned multiple properties,it would of saved people the waste time of bothering to reply .
Back in the real world,most parents encourage their DC to be responsible and look to the future because they can't afford to gift them a house ..how incredibly lucky are you ..did you start this thread just to rub people's noses in it

Best decision I made was not to bother buying a house and spending it all on travelling. I then got married to someone who already owned a house, so I’ve lost nothing! I did however rent but this was over a decade ago. More expensive now and pointless if you can live at home, which you aren’t really, you are travelling. The only thing I would suggest though is dump that job and go teach English in Japan for a year. You’ll earn the same, get accommodation covered and have much more independence

What nonsense @Theoturkeyfliesnorthwest - I had no family money. I rented and even had to give my parents money to avoid them taking out pay day loans. However I knew that owning a house would narrow my life and I was only in my 20’s. You just sound jealous.

Yeah, like your parents with their 5 properties. Maybe have a go at them?

I’d saved £26K by the time I was 26. That was 20 years ago, and I could have saved more if I’d stayed in shared accommodation, but I hated sharing. Back then it was still possible to rent a tiny flat on a £20–25K salary (which was what I earned in my 20s).
But people come from different backgrounds and different life setups, and that’s fine. None of my peers are in a total mess now (mid-40s), even though we all started differently. Some are better off (usually thanks to inheritances, yes) but nobody is suffering or stuck regretting what they did or didn’t do.
A few years ago I had a PhD student who spent her savings on a car because she couldn’t see herself ever being able to use it for a house deposit (it wasn’t much, to be fair). I felt sorry for her.
But honestly, life has a way of sorting people out, and often in a good way. That’s just my take.

When did you live alone? And did you pay your own (market) rent? I somehow doubt it...

The OP doesn't need to worry about it as their parents are loaded! They are following Formula one around for the culturally enriching experience!

What does this even mean?

@WeCouldBeNice

who do you follow F1 with? Who do you go to London with?

Coming from a mediterranean family that kids live with parents until they are financially stable, this is absolutely fine. Saying that though you need to have some kind of plan for the future. How do you see yourself in 10 years?! It’s good to enjoy now but I would be concerned if there is no plan to either up your income or move out. I moved out of home at 26 (to do my MSc) which is late for many British families (as I was exactly like you having fun, partying etc during my uni/gap years) but now I am 38 and I managed to have a career, buy a house in London etc. So a bit more balance will be good I think!