To have ended it over this?

[Ubspp]

I probably am being dramatic.

DP of three years has always said he didn’t use Facebook or Instagram. Tonight I brought dinner in and saw him on it. I said oh are you back on social media then. At this point I didn’t think much of it and he started talking about reading the local area update on it. I do the same thing so that was that.

Around half an hour later I just said we should connect on Facebook and Instagram as it feels a bit strange not to. He then went into detail about how he doesn’t use it, why would I want to do that and he’s a private person etc. He basically refused to connect with me. This then made me feel confused and upset (I realise that sounds like I’m a 13 year old!). But something in me just switched and I asked him to leave. He said he didn’t want to but eventually did.

I haven’t heard from him since. Thoughts?

Same, I use social media to follow bands, events & organisations I'm interested in. I haven't connected with any family/friends & would feel the same about a partner.

@Ubspp to slot it sounds childish as social media is nothing but trouble .
However he clearly has something to hide .

Trust your gut he’s not trustworthy .
Id go as far as to say he’s had social media all along and you have just been blocked .

I don't post on any social media - Facebook, Insta ,X etc - but I do use them a bit, like your DP to check up stuff in the local area eg our residents association has a favebook page only.

I wouldn't want to connect with any friends or family on social media, as I don't want to have to follow and engage with them on those sites, we connect via whatsapp.

OP I think you're reading way too much into your DP not wanting to connect with you - it doesn't mean he has a secret life on social media, he just doesn't want to engage with it.

I was on Facebook for a few months years ago - I just couldn't stomach the false positivity. The demands for validation from some people was too much for me, and it was putting me off some friends, so I left. I have a very boring life, no secrets that I'm keeping from anyone!

Ditto. I use FB to find out what music events are coming up and to post the odd photo.
Most of my fb friends are people I don't have regular contact with - I don’t have any family on there and I never followed anyone I was dating, including my ex H of 25 years.

I don’t get what value there is adding close friends and family that you speak to regularly or a partner you are in constant contact with anyway. It all seems pointless and immature to me.

My exh did this. He was having an affair with a 24 year old and didn’t want her to see his wife and kids.

Your reaction is quite strong... Do you think he's hiding something? The fact that your reaction was to get upset and ask him to leave, suggests that - in your gut - you suspect something's up.

Did you read the bit where he allowed her to look through his phone?

Does that bring down the 100 at all?

I dont have instergram but i do have FB only to read updates in my area.
My page is in a fake name my sister asked me to add her i said no i dont have friends on their i dont use it for that and i dont add people.
She was not happy with me and said i was hiding something.
Im not its just a fake fb profile that i read updates on and look at the migraine suffering page.
She still thinks im hiding something.
Still asking to add her i flat refuse each time.
Ive told her there is nothing on ther i dont post anything never have.
So i just let her carry on with her suspicions.

Bit strange to share bodily fluids for 3 years and not FB.

So, he has showed OP his phone and allowed her to scroll through his accounts. She has been able to see that he hasn't posted on them for years. He simply doesn't want to add anyone new because he doesn't really use it and hasn't added anyone new since 2012.

I think @CopperWhite's summary is pretty accurate
You want him do something completely meaningless that he doesn’t want to and as he won’t do it you end your entire relationship. That sounds like hes had a lucky escape from being controlled and manipulated because you are refusing to listen to his explanation.

The bit I was focused on was him saying he is not on Facebook, then op seeing him on Facebook and then him reiterating that he’s not on facebook. Why lie if there’s nothing to hide and why is he trying to gaslight her? Liars are hiding something. And no, it wouldn’t make any difference to my view that he let her look through his phone. In fact that would increase my suspicion.

I'm suddenly much more interested in your backstory than hers.

Well I am not sure what is in your mind, but it has nothing to do with my life!