Was I unreasonable to take my daughters with me to get my nails done?

[OrlaMcCool]

I changed my name for this because I’ve told other people about it.
I was planning on getting my nails done for a special occasion today and I went to a hotel spa I’d been given a voucher for.

I have taken my daughters (5 and 9) with me to a walk in nail bar before and they sit with snacks and their iPad.
No one has ever complained and some customers and the technicians seem to have enjoyed having them there and chatting about colours and designs. If it’s too busy for them to sit next to me then they sit in the waiting area.

The only suitable appointment was today at 4pm so after school. I had no choice so took my girls with me planning to do the same and let them sit and wait with their iPad.
When I arrived the woman on reception said in a really shitty tone of voice that kids weren’t allowed inside not even to wait quietly.
I said they would be really good but she said absolutely not because there were people in rooms having treatments and they wanted to keep a relaxing atmosphere.

I do understand this and didn’t realise that they did nails by the treatment rooms, I asked if there was anywhere else they could sit and I was practically begging.
Another woman came over and said she was the owner and said I needed to make another appointment. I explained I didn’t have a chance and that my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off, I was nearly in tears because I was embarrassed and frustrated.

The owner said that no children were allowed in the spa under any circumstances and was hostile and standing like a bouncer at the door. I left because I didn’t want to make a fuss but I was holding back tears and thought the way she spoke to me was rude and unfair.

I know it wasn’t ideal and I probably didn’t think it through properly because I’m used to taking my girls with me to the usual place I go to.
I think they could have been a bit kinder and let them sit in reception but I suppose they didn’t know that they will actually sit and behave nicely.
I’m not asking if I was unreasonable to take them, I want to know if I’m unreasonable for expecting the staff to have been less aggressive and for speaking to me that way in front of my children and making them sound like a nuisance.

I was going to complain to the hotel that rents the space to the spa but my sister said I was being ridiculous and told me to post for opinions on here.

The fact that you said you would turn the iPads down!! They had no head phones. Hell no do I want to go to a Spa and listen to that.

Yabu. Your response should have been more like "I understand. When can I rebook?" Rather than begging and nearly in tears

How is saying “sorry but no kids are allowed in here so you will need to change your appointment” (which is what OP quotes the first time the salon commented) being unkind or rude?

I home educate my children so they nearly always have to come with me to everythint

howevr I always ask in advance and they’re a lot older and teens now so they can go walking now but when they were younger I always asked before I made the appointment

if there is a no kids policy. Then that’s it

they don’t seem particularly rude to me about it though. 🤷🤷‍♀️

@OrlaMcCool in addition to clients not wanting kids around or ipad noise, the owner is doing your kids a favour. Nail (and beauty) salons are full of pollutants and irritants. The volatile compounds from formaldehyde, toluene and other chemical compounds, dust from nails and acrylics, etc are nasty and children would be especially vulnerable. i appreciate this may be a once more but just thought its worth flagging it

They probably wouldn’t have been insured or if a safe environment, also why you expecting people to baby sit your kids. You’re entitled and the fact you pushed and pushed after you were told no shows how ridiculous you were. I’m not surprised the staff got annoyed at you.

If I'm having a spa treatment the last people I want to see or hear are kids ffs!

I think you're being a somewhat entitled to assume it was ok to take them. Next time ask in advance when you're going for a treatment.

It’s a spa which generally are for adults so it would be better to check in advance. Also I don’t think an iPad is sufficient to keep a 5 year old solely entertained. Plus if I pay a lot of money for a spa day I appreciate that it’s child free and I have children.

Your kids go around admiring other people's nails and approaching other customers? They like to help you pick out your colour? They sit on iPads with no headphones..and you think this is ok?

They were right to send you packing.

You're being unreasonable I wouldn't bother complaining to be honest. You rocked up there with 2 kids in tow without even checking if they'd be ok with them being there. Then upon being told they don't allow kids you've begged them to be allowed to sit at reception on their iPads. Their receptionist isn't an insured or registered childminder. If anything happened to your kids you'd be first to kick off at the company despite knowing they aren't there to mind your kids whilst getting your nails done. You're meant to be teaching your kids boundaries and that no means no yet you're showing them that you can pester people to try and get your own way. I bet you wouldn't tolerate that behaviour from your kids without telling them off for it

I think the fact you said about turning volume off as though you were making a concession tells me everything. If there’s one thing I can’t stand its kids on iPads - kids on iPads with volume up instead of headphones in public with awful cartoon voices playing at full volume drives me insane. On trains etc I can almost put up with it but I’d complain very loudly if I was paying to be at a spa and there were kids there on their iPads. Of course it’s unacceptable and good for the spa to tell you firmly and not back down.

My salon allows kids to get their nails done & charges a children’s rate . I don’t mind as long as they’re being good and quiet .

I would never take my kids to sit in a nail salon.

If the nail technicians need to wear masks to protect them from the dust and other fumes and irritants it is no place for my children.

My nails are au naturel. Life goes on.

I nearly did this once with my DD . She would have been 5 or 6 at the time. I almost took her with me to get my eyebrows done, thinking it would be fine as I’m sure I saw someone else’s kids in there once . I got some childcare at the last minute. Later I found out, of course, they had a no child policy.
It’s fair enough.
No one wants kids in a spa, we go to get away from our kids.
I’m someone who would have been polite to your kids but internally would have been rolling my eyes.
I think the main problem here is you didn’t back down and were begging and I dare say, arguing with them. You really should have done, but lesson learnt.
Go when they are at school, get an hours childcare, or a mobile nail technician.

I have only had my nails done once and I took my kids with me. I did book them in too tho.

I have absolutely no concept of the difference between a nail bar and a spa. i don't know where I went
They had peach towels.

So i don't think you were unreasonable, but I don't think you should complain. You just didnt get it.

Id just forget it and move on.

It sounds like they were perfectly kind and polite the first 2 times but after the third time you asked them to make an exception for you, the "guarding the door in a hostile manner" happened.

So I don't think you can fault them for not being kind enough to you. No one should have to tell an adult 3 times that their policy is no kids.

I also wanted to comment on your view that as long as their ipads could not be heard in the treatment rooms, then it was ok to have them. All clients would have had to pass through the reception area, where your children were. Thats not ok.

@OrlaMcCool was it in the Leeds area by any chance?

OP please stop making excuses.

No kids were allowed. It’s a spa - you would know that.
Kids who don’t wear headphones in public places never mind an adults only spa is rude. Even if it’s low.
Taking your kids to a relaxing adults only location is entitled. There may have been others around and there is nothing worse than children animated iPad noise.

So depute all that they told you no kids. You didn’t like the answer and ‘begged’ them to have your children stay and were close to tears. Your behaviour is either of someone who gets upset because they don’t think the rules apply to them and isn’t used to hearing the word no or completely overreaction.

The spa also lost the appointment (which you don’t seem to understand they lost money because of your mistake).

You are complete in the wrong and you don’t complain just because you don’t like the rules and didn’t like them being enforced.

@Snorlaxo If your kids had heard some adult conversation eg about sex then I’d bet you’d be the first to complain.

Women go to nail spas to have conversations about sex...? What.

Every spa I’ve seen (and nail service is part of the ‘spa’ experience usually) doesn’t allow under 18 yr olds in.

Nail salon on it’s own and nail salon in a spa are two different things

You were so unreasonable and I cannot believe you let your children watch their iPads in public places with the "volume down low". Gah you are my nightmare!!!!

" If people can’t cope with a 5 minute chat with polite children then that’s their issue."

You go on and on about "be kind" but you are not being kind to the other people there. The nail techs are having their jobs made harder by having to entertain your children and the other customers are being bothered.

How will you feel when your children are upset by a customer completely blanking them? So far you've been lucky but one day that luck will run out. By not teaching your children socially appropriate behaviour you are being very unkind to them.

@arcticpandas

are you saying that women who get their nails done aren’t intelligent??

intelligent woman don’t put down other women.

@shuggles

women can talk about whatever they want in a spa, including sex, they don’t have to censor themselves because they are in an ADULT ONLY environment (or it should be).