AIBU to be a little sad at the idea of dd not believing in Father Christmas anymore?

[Readyforslippers]

Dd is in Year 3 at school (all aged 7/8), she absolutely believes in Father Christmas at the moment. How many more years am I likely to have? I feel perhaps someone at school may spill the beans soon?

I understand some parents don't agree with it, but for me her belief is something quite magical and I feel a little sad at the idea of that ending. AIBU to feel this way and to try to make this year a little extra special just in case? I suppose the problem is that I could end up saying that for several years.

She's growing up too quickly, it's like I've blinked since she was tiny and she's now in key stage 2!

Ha, I love the way her mind works, that's actually very clever!

You can still do the bits of it you enjoy.

We still sneak in with stockings for the kids (they are teens). It became a game. We’ve had a lot of fun “pretending” Father Christmas was doing something or needed something and the kids have loved being part of that joke.

Haha thanks... she asked me "how does he know how old I am and what I like?" And I said something like "he has a list" (like in that song Santa Claus is coming)...

And then she was like "oh right that must be a long list on the computer then" and that was it, FC is just a team of bureacrats to her now lol.

Let's be honest, in this age of Deliveroo and Amazon Prime, getting a present appearing at your house doesn't require magic any more! Haha

He is real after all - he is just now called Amazon prime. How depressing!

Yes! Friend of my daughter told her aged 6-7. Kids know it can’t be real and play along, I think.

Numerous things may or may not contribute.
friends with older children, her friends having older siblings, being suspicious herself.

my step kids were 10 (told not to spoil it for others, younger one didn’t work it out til 11 nearly 12. my eldest worked it out at 8!!! No siblings spoilt it, just him having worked it out for himself!

we were lucky that a lot of his friends were the eldest too but those that did have older siblings hadn’t had it ruined by them.

honestly, mine loved the fact he became a “Santa” too because he knew the secret 😉 (he never spoilt it for anyone either!!!)

You might have a few years yet!
I worked with someone who genuinely believed in Santa until she was 14 and with a Mum who didn’t have time to wrap some gift in Santa’s special paper. She was distraught when her brother scoffed at her still believing. She was 12.

It’s genuinely liberating to give up lying to the kiddos. I’m not great at the duplicity. Loved when dsd stopped around 10. Roll on ds who is now 3. Hopefully he gets there sooner with my incompetent lying.

I can't believe people are calling innocent kids 'horrible ' and 'arseholes' for saying that Santa isn't real when, well in fact he isn't real and they are right.

My daughter was asking questions last year, aged 9. I asked her well what do you believe, she said I think he's real and we left it at that. This year her best friend told her but she seemed more ready to realise and accept the reality and demanded a direct response so I had to admit all. The same for tooth fairy etc. She took it well but it is sad that she wont believe this year. She's promised not to spoil it for her little brother aged 7. I hope to get a couple more years of Santa magic with him before it ends.

I feel the same as you with my Grandaughter who is the same age and also in a class with some boys and girls who are 10 months older.
I’ve decided to take her to Lapland to see the “real” Santa clause because I know time is running out. Her siblings, mum and dad have all been. I know she will be excited and we’ve decided to keep it a secret untill we fly.
My DD has lovely memories when i took her and hopefully she will too.

My 14 year old and I had a conversation about Santa only last Christmas. She had pretended to believe until this point! I am fairly sure my 10 year old is pretending too but we aren't mentioning that!! I told my daughter that now she knows the secret she gets to join in and be Santa. She picked someone and we bought a gift for them and gave it without them knowing who it was from. Without telling us, she then popped into a posh chocolate shop on her way home from school and spent her own money on some little chocs for me and her dad and left them under the tree labelled from Santa! She is loving the thought of helping me choose the stocking presents for her sister which is lovely too! There's a new kind on magic in them being big so although it's a bit sad to think about, there's plenty to look forward to as well!

I hear you. I was so sad when both my kids knew the truth. When my son was going into high school, so 12 he was, I had to actually tell him. I know some kids pretend to still believe, in case Father Christmas just doesn’t come, but my son 100% still believed. We couldn’t let him be ridiculed in high school, so we took him for ice cream, and told him, he was devastated! His little sister told us about age 8, she knew Santa wasn’t real. We went along with pretending he was, til she was bout 11. It’s hard because the magic seems to disappear. But, give it a few years, now we are loving having young adults (plus their add ons!) share Christmas with us, and I love it.

I knew by that age. All my school friends did.
It's only parents who try to pretend it's real-which I always think is a bit sad... for them and for their DCs.
Peddling a fantasy (lying) to children when they know something isn't real but they pretend to believe it to please their parents doesn't seem healthy to me.
Christmas is about so much more than a pretendy man in a suit. Family, sharing, fun, being kind to others are WAY more important ultimately than feeling sad about a fairy story🤷🏼‍♀️

This. 100%👏👏

My daughter (just 8) said she knows it’s us recently.

Strikes me clinging on to the Father Christmas fantasy says more about the adults' needs and less about the children's' tbh.
Why is it sad if an 8 year old realises the truth? They are still able to love Christmas and all the fun and pleasure.. isn't it more sad to expect a growing child to believe in something which ultimately is untrue?
I, and most of my friends, knew by age 8 that Father Christmas isn't real-but it didn't stop us loving the day.. presents, family, food, decorations. We still do! We just know the truth. It didn't kill us, it didn't spoil Christmas. What WOULD have spoiled Christmas is a sad adult peddling a fantasy which we had to play along with to make that adult feel happier.
Honestly-don't lie to them. Roll with it. Don't be sad..adapt and move on!! Christmas is magic.. if it only relied on belief that a fantasy character was real it would have died out years ago!

Because it’s not fair on other kids. Life is crap enough, let them have some magic in their childhood FFS!

Of course I did that. But I was still annoyed that another kid was going round the class saying Santa isn’t real. Once the seed of doubt is sown there’s no going back.

And you think a 5 year old is talking about it out of a desire to ruin this apparent magical childhood? Rather than just talking about something new as children do? Because unless you do believe they're doing it with vicious intent then there's zero justification to be furious with a child.

This. Once the cat’s out the bag it’s hard to go back.

They might well have been doing it with “vicious” intent. And if they weren’t, then how do they know Santa doesn’t exist? Clearly from their older siblings or parents, who if that is the case are to blame for telling them too young.

Edited to add: And ruining it for everybody else!!

There’s zero point asking this question on a forum. You’ll get people saying you’ve done well to get to 7 with them still believing, others saying you have another year or 2, others saying secondary school age, others saying 14, others saying you should never have told them about Santa in the first place. Your child will believe for as long as they believe and it isn’t impacted by what other people have experienced or think.