Snapped in the parent and child parking

[seize]

Juggling my 3 month old from their baby carrier trying to get them into the car seat, a car pulls in and asks me to close my door, while I’m halfway into getting my baby in their seat.

Out hops a child in school uniform about 10 years old, not help needing any help to get out, my face must have had an expression of surprise. Someone in need of this space being asked to stop what they’re doing to allow someone not in need of the space to use it. The adult said “ignorant” loudly at me. So I snapped back, “these spaces are for people with babies and children that need help getting in and out, they aren’t for older children” she snaps something back at me about not knowing how old their child is (the one that is in school uniform, fairly tall, that needed no help getting out and is now safely stood in a car park without the adult needing to have them in their line of sight) and the bratty child screams “yeah!”.

I’ve had it with these spaces, they aren’t a convenience for people that happen to have a person under the age of 16 with them. They’re for people who genuinely need the help getting them in and out and need the extra space.

I’m not the one yelling “ignorant” at a mum struggling to get a baby into a car seat in a space designed for this purpose simply because I wanted to go about my business faster.

Is the kids up to 12 really a thing? The spaces in my local supermarket (I call them parent & toddler spaces) show a parent with a buggy. I've always assumed they're for babies/toddlers.

My DS is 11 and literally just today had surgery to remove an external fixator from his leg - he's been in a wheelchair all summer. I wouldn't dream of using a parent & toddler space for him even in his current condition. I think he was under 24 months last time I used one!

Sure but presumably a blue badge place is tie first port of call. In all the car parks round us here are always loads more empty disabled spots than P&C.

You being unreasonable doesn't make her a nice person. But you shouldn't have stopped what you were doing in the first place, just to allow her to go about her business faster

I know that MN probably has a disproportionate number of parents of disabled or children with additional needs but the blunt reality is that there are a lot of pisstakers and general lazy arses who park where they shouldn’t.

All those parents are doing is ensuring that they get away with it with this narrative - and that’s not good for your kids either.

Snapping usually does involve some degree of behaving outside of one’s normal limits.

I don’t really understand - so she asked if you could pull your door in a bit so her child could get out and you said no? Or you ignored her?

I still use parent and child spaces with my 8 year old, and she’s fully able to get in and out of the car herself.
if someone tried to pull me up on using them I’d probably tell them to piss off to be honest - unless it categorically stated a younger age.

Something tells me those who meet that criteria are less likely to pick fights, tell someone with a baby to stop what they’re doing for their convenience and yell ignorant at a stranger to start a fight.

They could, but equally so could the person taking longer. Same principle as letting someone with a couple of items go ahead of you at the checkout when you've got a trolley full.

Well you need to consider that there is a limited amount of spaces and if your child can independently open a door, slip out safely through it and follow instructions to stand still to navigate the car park with you. Then you are taking a space away from someone who genuinely needs it, especially if they are juggling baby paraphernalia like prams, carriers and baby car seats.

That's your choice, they are for any parents with children who need them. Children usually have to sit in a car seat in the back, if you have 3 doors only it often means you need more space to open the door wide enough for them to get out. They aren't just for babies and toddlers.

I don’t ’need’ to consider anything.
if they were purely for the situation that you described they would have a younger age limit than 12, wouldn’t they? And as I said before, if they clearly started that they were I wouldn’t use it.
and you were wrong in your op…they ARE a convenience.

you didn’t confirm - did you say no or ignore?

Wait till you see people with no children park in them

I got on with the job I was doing which took a few seconds, because my 3 month old baby is more important than the stranger barking abuse at me.

I am saddened by your attitude, you exemplify what is wrong with the world, the saddest part being that you’re bringing up a child with the same sordid attitude as you.

Yes, it’s annoying. Those spaces are meant for getting car seats or younger kids in and out the car but but some people just don’t think (or care). If the shop says up to 12 then technically nothing you can do. She was rude though! If an older child with additional needs genuinely needs more space then their parents/carers should apply for a Blue Badge.

Gosh I think if you are getting this wound up about a parking space then you must have little to worry about. It's a small inconvenience, that's it. First world problems.

Spoken like someone who has no idea how hard it is to get a blue badge.

There are many people who have mobility needs that sadly don’t meet the threshold for a blue badge.

😂(missing the instant response Laughing Emoji!)

That's a little harsh, it's only parking in a parking space for the use they are designed for. Hardly a sordid attitude.

So did you reply and say ‘one sec?’

or ignore?

because if you ignored her, she’s right…you are ignorant.

I’d calm down a little if I were you…using a parent and child space when you have a child under the specified age limit really isn’t sordid.
do you never drive to places that don’t have p&c parking? How on earth do you cope then?

Depends on the store actually. My local retail park has labelled them parent and toddler bays and fine anyone without a toddler or baby.

Oh don’t worry, I do know how hard it is to get a Blue Badge — my disabled daughter actually has one. We applied because she genuinely needs the extra space.

Regardless of whether they needed room, asking you to close your door when you were in the middle of transferring your baby was a bit ridiculous. YANBU.

It was a pretty bad the way the other person spoke to you. I have always waited for anyone who is juggling a little one into the car, regardless of whether it is on the road or in a P & C space.

However, YABU for arguing they should not be using the P & C spaces. They are for children under 12 - so as long as you stand by what you are saying, and stop using them when your children are a bit older and walking, then I will retract my YABU.

As other posters have said, children have a habit of swinging the car door open, and parking in a P & C space gives you that little bit of extra room.

You are 100% in the right on this and don’t let anyone tell you any different!