To think working parents get more workplace sympathy than single, childfree staff who are expected to pick up the slack?

[PlainTealCrow]

Parents get flexibility and understanding when life is hard. Childfree staff? Expected to stay late and cover gaps. AIBU to think this double standard is rarely acknowledged?

🥱 🥱 this gets trotted out by troublemakers all the time who seem to forget that the flexibility needed whilst your children are young is a very small portion of your complete working life.
You could say that those who are yet to be parents support those that have become parents as a more positive look at the same point so nothing to do with the permanently child free...a bit like NI contributions, our contributions before becoming parents offset our contributions for the few years we need parental flexibility.

This was explained on another thread a couple of years ago but i will do it again Grace has two children and yes its a short part of working life but as her kids get older Deborah who has a five year old boy starts working for the company then James who has a two year old starts there etc etc..............It might be a small portion of your working life but the trouble makers my inverted commas arent working are usually covering for MORE than one parent over the years of working for a company.

No not in my workplace.

@JenniferBooth so what about the time before they were working parents the individual company they work for at that point is irrelevant, people move companies, they are still working and contributing (and working more than parents according to the trouble makers)

But if you have to collect kids from nursery etc. and genuinely can’t get there in time without leaving a bit early and flexing hours, you have to. It’s not an option to just leave the kids - these are small human beings who can’t be left alone! It’s not really a choice!

DH had to go to work 30mins late last week as I was travelling with work so couldn’t do school run I usually do to drop kids at breakfast club. His employer kept saying “oh we’ll see if that’s ok and let you know” but never did confirm despite chasing. Well, when the morning arrived guess where DH was - at home doing school run. Because what other choice does he have (we do use breakfast club already, so it’s not like we aren’t already using all the available other options!)

So whilst it might seem like lots of favourable treatment and flexibility….. it’s not really a choice. Kids need caring for and you can’t exactly just decide they can fend for themselves whilst you finish off a work report in case your colleagues think you’re slacking! IME parents end up working such late hours in the evening to ensure they’re not seen as slacking tbh.

Im just pointing out it doesnt end when Graces children get older.

@JenniferBooth if every parent had children at the same point in time then you might have a point, but they don't it's a continuum so as one parent needs flexibility another (parent or parent to be) is available to be more flexible because people don't all have children at the same time

But by that logic no one asks to be born and it's only because of parents we're dumped on this planet and forced to care about any of this in the first place.

EXACTLY

Yes so your point doesn't make sense

I give up

I must say your boss sounds delightful!

I don’t envy you working under such a controlling person.

I previously worked somewhere that non-parents were banned from taking leave during the summer holidays.

That really pissed me off.

Fucking horrible post, I am infertile shall I just kill
myself now ?

No, maybe staff with very young children as unavoidable issues crop up with small children.
I don't mind someone needing leeway once they pull their weight.
Ime it's probably the male members of staff who get away with more, ignoring the finer details.
You will find good and not so good workers across society with or without children.

Odd over dramatic response. It’s not all about you. Looking at it coldly and economically we all do rely on there being a next generation. Surely it makes sense to offer some support to those ensuring there is a next generation?

You sound utterly utterly insufferable and without any compassion for someone who is struggling tonight

I think it's brilliant that some (but sadly not enough) employers are genuinely flexible towards parents and try to accommodate their needs. All companies should be offering part time or job share options and support for last minute leave requests etc. for parents (and carers, for that matter) in emergencies.
However, in my last job everyone in my team bar me had childcare responsibilities and finished at two. As our team looked after a very busy public phone line, 9 to 5, I was the only one who covered the phones later in the day, which meant I could never take advantage of the company's Flexi policy and leave early.
It feels like good employers (I'm in the CS) do sometimes overlook business needs and the full time workers can bear the brunt. But of course that's not always the case.

Agreed. And that poster seems to have forgotten that those who can’t have children nevertheless support the lives of other people’s children.

Definitely. That's because mostly people are thinking of the child in the scenario, who is ill and needs their parent, or wants their parent to see them in their play or be there on Christmas Day, so the concession to the parent is due to adults being largely predisposed to think the happiness and welfare of children is a priority.
Its exactly the same as any other 'perks' people with children benefit from, extra benefits, higher places on housing lists. It's aimed at children, and their parents are indirect beneficiaries.

I work in HR and have found the majority of employers to be incredibly understanding (mainly since Covid) of ALL peoples work-life balance and offer flex to all, regardless of parental status. There is much more emphasis on wellbeing and mental health. Perhaps I’ve been lucky. But if people aren’t happy in their work situation, they should seek another.

In my experience, workplaces either give zero slack to anyone, or they are understanding of a variety of personal circumstances.

In my experience also, parents are often working as hard as anyone else, but unseen hours. E.g. thinking of a project where everyone was in the office to 9pm, except the woman with a young child. However when we were logging off at 9pm, she was logging back on and working until midnight.

But frankly, no one should be facing pressure to work beyond their contracted hours routinely.

Maybe at your workplace but that didn’t happen at mine. I was childfree at the time. I left after having children because the job wouldn’t be a great fit with our family life.

TBF, many people have directly/repeatedly experienced things like parents believing they get priority on summer and Christmas annual leave because they "deserve" it more. And weak managers enable this, which perpetuates the issue.

And like it or not, having children IS a choice that is not relevant to your employment or employer. I have two working parents (babies/toddler ages) in my own team and they get the same flexibility and consideration as the non-parents, because the demands, emergencies and other random issues that crop up are equally valid and important to the person they affect.