Old-ish man on the route to the Co-op who keeps saying hello

[RogueFemale]

I moved house last week and already have noticed this man. He lives on the short (7m) walking route to the local Co-Op. He's maybe mid 60s, tall, heavy build. He is always standing outside his front door, and he loudly says hello every time I go past. I ignore him.

I'm 60 and am used to being invisible.

So it's not a leering hello. I also thought maybe it was accidental he was standing outside before, or something, and just a cheery 'local' hello.

But I went past twice today (to Co-Op) and he was there both times, hello-ing, and I'm finding it quite weird, that he's always standing outside his front door.

I'm going to be going to the local Co-Op a lot, so what do I do?

AIBU to continue to ignore him and just doggedly go past for years pretending he's not there?

She doesn't have to.

But he's on his own property and not doing anything wrong, so she has the choice of ignoring, saying hello and carrying on, or changing route if she's unhappy.

What does that question relate to in this thread? I’ve read the quotes leading up to it and can’t understand what this was in response to.

Did you ever think he might be socially isolated & standing at his door is his only form of social contact & by you ignoring him is possibly upsetting him deeply ! He’s just trying to be a cheerful chap saying hello & your being a miserable old fart who needs to stop being so fucking up yourself!!

But the “behaviour” is saying hello. It’s up to the OP if she doesn’t want to engage with that, but this is hardly a case of harassment.

Have you always been a misandrist or did it happen after some sort of trauma?

If you say hello and keep walking or simply wave in acknowledgement, how does it encourage a dialogue?

So not only are you exceptionally rude and a transphobic bigot you are also misunderstanding the reference. The Crucible is a play about innocent people being accused of witchcraft. With absolutely zero evidence, you are suggesting that a man is a creep and might break into your home and rape you based on the evidence that he says hello when you walk past him. Nobody is calling women witches.

Just carry on being rude and ignoring him and I’m sure he will realise you are not worth saying hello to soon enough

Wow!!!!! thats a big assumption. Perhaps he lives on his own and spends a lot of time outside his home just trying to strick up conversations with passers-bys. You could say hello, then explain that you just like to keep yourself to yourself and just give a wave to him when he shouts hello and carry on walking.

just say good morning/Hi.

we have an older neighbour who stands & sits on deckchair outside his front door with his elderly Alsatian in good weather speaking to all who pass by.

Find a new route, or a different time

A lot of people where I live say hello if they're standing outside their house and I'm walking past. Just say hello and carry on.

He's saying hello from his front door, not getting close up to her and invading her personal space. If she wants to pretend she hasn't heard him she can of course do so, but he's done nothing wrong.

@RogueFemale have you been eaten by the BFG saying hello? Or are you stuck in the Co-op?
is there an update for today?

It's quite common where I live for people (particularly those who've retired) to spend a lot of time standing at the front, chatting to neighbours and whoever else goes by.

Saying "hello" doesn't mean he's mentally ill.

Just say hello back, be polite for goodness sake.

Obviously then you assess any future conversation from there, you can always say you're in a rush if you don't want it to go beyond "hello".

Some people are genuinely friendly to their neighbours.

If this a real post and not just a troll looking for an argument, then it sounds like OP has a personality disorder and posted this purely for validation and attention. And WTF was the random “trans identifying man” comment about?

What a drip feed. Started with a 60 year old man standing out and saying hello. Now he’s turned into a giant who rapes women on the way to coop.

you have had a lot of trauma with SA and rape which you may need to have some
therapy for as is it’s not all men.

there was a man by us who used to stand outside all day. He said hello. Never left his front garden. He was autistic and his elderly mother cared for him. I very much doubt he knew which end of the penis to use. Then he was gone one day as his mum died.

you must walk past men on the way to the coop. How do you cope?

solution is to go on deliveroo as they deliver from the Coop.

A cant be the only one that found this really funny , 🤣 especially all the say hello back answers.

I’m the most likely person I know to avoid greeting randoms in the street, and even I would say “morning”
in reply to him, even if I didn’t give him eye contact.

This thread is bizarre. NOBODY needs to respond to unwanted interactions particularly not from unknown men. @RogueFemale, carry on ignoring this man. He is not your problem.

Yep, not your responsibility. You don't have to go around ppl pleasing.

Sorry, this made me chuckle 🥰

OP, I don't suppose you live in the Southwest, only there is an elderlyish man who lives on the road of my local Co-Op, who stands outside his door to talk to anyone who passes by 😄

I'd avoid people I know in the street if I thought I'd get away with it - I can't bear small talk - and even I would say 'morning'.

I know several people locally who have psychoses and always say hello. Why wouldn't you?

I find you rude for not saying hello back. It’s nice manners when someone says hi or hello to respond. Maybe next time he should stick his finger up at you