Ungrateful Teens on Florida holiday

[WatermelonWaveclub]

I brought my 3 teens (18, 16 and 13) to Florida to celebrate my eldest's 18th. Honestly it has been a nightmare. Every morning they refuse to get up. We end up leaving for the day's activity hours late. At least one usually refuses to come. Then we end up rushing around with the youngest upset we don't have time to do everything they want. When we get home late and I just want to sleep I am expected to sort food for whoever stayed back at the hotel. Then they stay up late keeping me awake. I'm exhausted!

The main thing they seem to want to do is stay in bed on their phones! Noone seems to worry about wasting a lot of money on activities they don't attend or any thought to making the most of a holiday they are very lucky to be on! No care about me missing out on things I'd like to do or their sibling would like to do. They were fully aware of what the holiday would involve and said they would like to go on the holiday. For example they knew there would be a lot of swimming. One has point blank refused to swim and the other 2 will swim hypothetically but have not once been in the hotel pool with me in almost a week and both just layed on sunloungers on their phones at the water park yesterday.

How would you deal with this situation?

Perhaps it is all a bit much and you need chill out days in between activities? Or let them have more say about what they do and what time you leave?

Personally that kind of holiday, theme parks, thousands of people steaming hot humid weather I'd find knackering and it would fairly jangle my nerves and make me want to lie in a dark air-conditioned room for a bit. And half a day doing that after a chilled out morning would be ample.

I wish people would stop saying that all teenagers want to do is be on their phones. My son can be glued to his but if I took him to Florida he would not be lazing around refusing to do stuff, he would want to make the most of it. OP you do need to build in some down time and not expect to start too early but yanbu to expect then to engage especially given the cost and that they said they wanted to come.

You need to re-think the plans - one day off (for the teens - you and youngest can still do stuff), one day on. And on the 'on' days, those phones are confiscated / rationed and they should be told to buck up, stop wasting your money and enjoy the world around them.

Just drop the rope with the older two. Get up and go out with your youngest and enjoy the day. Don't even call them to get up. tell the hotel that they are not allowed to charge to the room - be very clear on this. leave 20 dollars for food for them. It is their loss.

Maybe because taking someone's phone away over choice of activity on holiday and throwing people in the pool, and warning them of "consequences when you get back" on holiday would be supremely utterly fucking shit parenting and really make for an absolutely delightful atmosphere on a family holiday? Just an idea.

Ungrateful and lazy wankers. Don’t beat around the bush, let them know this is the case.

Clamp down early and you don't need to resort to extreme measures. OP has two DC out of three who are creating what sounds like an absolutely delightful atmosphere on a family holiday. She has come to MN because she doesn't know what to do about it. I've added my suggestions. Like you, OP is free to reject them.

For typo

Don't take such disrespect from your own children.

I disagree. It sounds like those kids need to know their mother has had enough!

I would try and find early flights home and would never take them away again

This sounds like a wind up. Who is their right mind would choose a holiday like this at this time of year for this age group 🤣

Well that’s a bit silly

Why are you taking them away at the start of the school year?

i would tell them how you feel about their behaviour!!! and impress on them that if they don't change then it will be last holiday u take them on (all 3 ) no change then have fun with your 13 year old and forhet the other 2 certainly if they don't join in then no food let them starve they'l soon come round !!! don't forget its your holiday too enjoy

Are you an easily amused parrot by any chance?

Why are people giving the OP a hard time about the kids being out of school?! My parents took me out of school to go on holiday all the time. It didn't stop me from getting a first class degree.

You need to take their mobile phones of them until they get home Epcot centre is a great place universal studios and Kennedy space centre you need to engage them and find out what they enjoy they obviously don’t like swimming pools

Missing the start of the Autumn term is hugely disruptive to a child. They return and everyone else is settled with friendship groups and routines established. It’s the worst time of the year to be taken out for a holiday.

Do your own thing and resolve to charge them rent to repay asap

I've voted YABU - but only because you sound like you are being a Martyr. Waste of money for the kids - yes, of course - but this can't be new behaviour, so let them do what they want to and you and your youngest do what you want to do. Otherwise they are spoiling both your holidays. Don't cook for them if they don't come with you. And leave if they aren't ready when you told them what time you will be leaving. You can't MAKE them enjoy themselves, so leave them to it.

Worse, a PBP (previously banned poster) that is trying to bait people into engaging with them. Just ignore.

We came back from Florida a few weeks ago.

You need to adjust your expectations a bit (and they need to adjust theirs).

Plan for what's happening over the next 2 days. Make it clear that anyone who stays at the hotel will be expected to sort their own food (are you at one of those apartments that have cooking facilities? If not leave them the price of a meal at the hotel).

Eldest is old enough to organise an Uber to come and meet you later if they want. If they want to lie in then make an agreement that if they get up and out early with you tomorrow, the day after they get to lie in. Or go out later in the day and stay out later.

What on earth are you doing waiting around for them to get up. You tell them all the schedule the night before. You tell them that at 9 or 10am you will be leaving to go to ... Then you leave with whoever wants to come and is ready, having first got their own breakfast. Then some days you could return to the hotel/pool in the afternoon and join them if they didn't get up. If you wanted a full day out with your youngest, then don't feel the need to hurry back and take your youngest out for a nice early evening meal. Hand them a loaf of bread/stuff for sandwiches and let them sort themselves out. Use earplugs to get off to sleep.

Jet lag ✔️
humidity ✔️
Scorching days ✔️
walking around and queuing in parks ✔️

A Florida holiday is hard work.

There is more to Florida than Disney though, for those that want theme parks.. Universal, Seaworld parks. Those are both more geared towards older children, teens and adults.