Teacher told my child that child is not a Muslim

[Jkam24]

My daughter has recently started reception and asked me today if our family are Muslims, to which I said yes. She then started crying saying her teacher told her that she (my daughter) is not a Muslim. Is it unreasonable to be angry about this?

My four year old once told me an in depth story of how he was being bullied at school.

I spoke to the Principal and much later found out it was a complete and utter fabrication.

I’m not sure how old your daughter is - but in my child’s age lying is a developmental milestone. As he was delayed with his development we had skipped this milestone so the first time it emerged was when he told this story so I wasn’t prepared.

Ask the teacher what happened and keep an open mind as to what occurred.

How about you read OP’s updates? There is a feature allowing you to filter just the OP’s posts and read them. Really easy.

Hi OP, sorry you and your child are having to deal with this. And horrible people on here! Don't mind them. Teacher was completely being unreasonable and you were right to question it. And to take it further. It's not for the teacher to decide and say. That's like denying your child's faith and beliefs. In Islam children are born into the faith whereas in Christianity it's decided by the child themselves when they are old enough to decide I believe. You could address this further I feel as the teacher may not respect your wishes going forward, if you say child can't eat xyz as it's not appropriate or your child is excited about celebrating Eid. And you shouldn't be made to feel you can't speak out and made to carry this. This teacher needs training around diversity perhaps tbh even if she meant it in a non-offensive away. Probably won't be the last you have of these experiences!

Wow I can’t believe the teacher said that- so inappropriate. Did she apologise to you OP? If I were you I would raise this further I think as this teacher needs some cultural awareness training.

Wow the Islamophobia in this thread is wild. If people only bothered to learn the true values of Islam. So much purposeful misinterpretation of the OPs original question. Obviously it’s outrageous for a teacher to say that. The daughter presumably asked the question at home, after being told something different to what she believed, by a person in a supposed position of trust.

Op this really is out of order, I actually do think you need to escalate it. It’s a terrible thing to say to a child and then defend to the parent. I’d wonder what she was like as a teacher tbh, I mean who in the world does this.

That is weird. If she had told my kids they weren't Christian and they'd replied they'd been baptised, what would she had said? No, you've not been baptised (obviously not true), or Yes you've been baptised, but your minister is wrong, it doesn't make you part of the Christian church? (mega-confusing for the child).

At the age of 4, my kids had been in church for many baptisms, so they knew what it was, and that they'd been baptised themselves.

@Jkam24 - the question in your final sentence? A) because you're Moslem, and B) because this is Mumsnet which has some not insignificant Islamaphobia.

My reception child has told me since he started school last week

• a bird flew out of the toilet
• miss lets him have 4 puddings everyday
• they do nothing but watch pokemon
• the TA slipped on a poo in the toilet
• all of another child's teeth fell out
• the head teacher only ever talks about Jesus all day (she said a prayer at assembly)

my point being why would you believe her?

I guess she meant no child is a Muslim or Christian or Buddhist (or atheist or pantheist or anything else). It’s their parents who are. The child isn’t old enough the decide what they believe.

I have heard this argument made by people like Richard Dawkins. The idea is that adults have no right to impose religious beliefs on a child. In fact, it should be considered a form of abuse, especially when it involves terrifying the child with visions of hell and divine punishment.

OP is a teacher too 😏

Love this 😂😂

@Jkam24 thats absolutely outrageous. I would find that really really dehumanising. My religion is a huge part of the culture of my kids’ family lives. We go to synagogue, we follow certain dietary restrictions, we celebrate religious festivals, sing religious songs, wear religious clothing (at times). It’s a key part of the map of who my children are. Who would a teacher be to come and say “no you are not Jewish!!!!!”. I would be really really cross and be following that up. You’re being very calm!!

The teacher may well agree or have similar opinions to Richard Dawkins about children not being of a particular faith

but her opinions in regards to this should not shared with the children she teaches given they are so young

Religion is NOT just about your beliefs. Especially if you follow a minority religion, there is a huge amount of cultural context these children will be participating in within their community and family.

Teacher was definitely inappropriate and shouldn't be voicing her opinion on such topics. Imagaine if she'd said your child isn't a girl because she doesn't believe children should have genders? The majority of people would be advising you report it. I don't see the difference between that or insulting your religion here.

I'd report it and let the school decide if her conduct is appropriate. If she's done nothing wrong there's nothing to worry about. If she's so willing to voice her opinion to your DC on this who knows what other opinions/influence she is having?

I'm struggling to envisage a situation where a teacher would not only tell a child they weren't Muslim but openly admit it to the parent and state they didn't believe children could have a religion.

It's such a bizarre thing for a teacher to say, Absolute professional suicide. Are they an ECT? Because I cannot imagine what their training was like if they think this is ok.

It certainly needs raising with HT.

I'm as atheist as they come but I think this absolutely needs reporting to the HT. It is completely unacceptable for her to say this in the classroom to a young child.

The Muslim children who attend the CofE school I work at opt out of the Christian assemblies so they most certainly DO have a religion and individual adjustments are made for that. Absolutely bizarre to claim otherwise and I wouldn’t be happy at all in your position.

So what the hell is a baptism then? All these Christian children - are they not Christians? Teacher is an idiot and unqualified to talk about religion. I’d also question the teacher’s suitability for the role of teacher.

I know you don’t want to take it further but you really should mention it to the SLT, it’s not ok for a teacher to give their opinions on other peoples religion/religious practices.

Pretty much all adults impose beliefs in a child to encourage good behaviour, that includes scaring the child with negative consequences.

'he sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good so...'

Sounds like the teacher used language your child doesn’t understand, ask for clarification.

I also believe that children are born without any religion. But, as with language skills and gender roles, parents will choose what their children are told and what they learn as infants.

But! I would have been much more diplomatic and asked are your parents Muslim/Jewish/Catholic as appropriate. If they said yes I would say 'Then yes you are'. If they were older, say secondary school, I would add that some people will choose to change their religion or to have no religion at all once they become an adult.

Abrahamic religions have a very strong patriarchal core. They seek to control 'their' women and girls to keep them from having power or freedom over their own life choices.

I believe that Islam is, by far, the worst of the three Abrahamic religions in terms of how it treats women and girls. But people can and should decide this for themselves.

I would recommend reading the Quran to determine its 'true values'. It is available for free to download, as is the Bible and Torah, on Kindle.

Ok, 37 years as a teacher, 20 as SLT and I've not come across this attitude, but I'm secondary, so maybe that's why?
I'm sorry that you've encountered this.