To think most rich people don’t understand how the rest of us live?

[MyAmusedOpalCrab]

I keep seeing advice from wealthy people that is completely out of touch with reality - things like “just buy a house instead of renting” or “take a year off to travel and find yourself.” Even when they mean well, there’s a lack of awareness about how difficult things are for the average person. I’m not saying all rich people are like this but it does seem that extreme wealth can create a bubble where they forget what it’s like to struggle.

AIBU to think that most rich people genuinely don’t understand how the rest of us live? Or do you think this is unfair?

But those on lower incomes have those costs as well. You don’t have to earn 100k to have a mortgage but you do have a bigger cushion.

I would imagine they live in a significantly nicer house in a significanlty nicer area than people on much lower incomes who also have to buy food, pay for fuel, (my gas and elec now account for 15% of my income) water (up by 55% where I am this year), council tax (as a single person in a Band A house I pay more than if I was part of a couple sharing the council tax in a Band D). Less well off people do pay income tax and have child care costs too. I have never known anyone who earns £100K but I am sure their life is financially better than someone on the median UK salary of approx £37k.

Agree with this.

Not necessarily, and no, those on lower incomes do not have the same costs also. Higher earners pay 40%+ income tax, often have high student debts to pay off if having spent longer in education, and will receive zero handouts from the government. Any mortgage fluctuations can be higher too so the cushion you think is there is actually much smaller than you think it is and in fact the cushion to lower income households is often more reliable when hard times hit than it is with higher earners.

I know right? Why work at all if you can just sponge off the government for the same if not better lifestyle.🙄

I think baity stories and posts online don't help. People see stories about "single mum not working going on holiday abroad and buys all new furniture regularly" and it makes them assume benefits give people enough to live in the way people with decent wages do, and that anyone not managing that must just be overspending.

The one thing I don’t have sympathy for is private schools- that’s very much a choice , rarely a total necessity - I also feel some of life’s choices can be easier if on your own - yes there’s often less money in the pot but you don’t have to go along with someone else’s lifestyle expectations - it can be difficult if at some point you are in a long relationship and somehow aren’t really now on the same page with how to prioritise what money you have /don’t have . Lifestyle creep with some is a big thing - I have this situation and so does a friend of mine.

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I put my hands up to this.

One example springs to mind immediately:

I remember learning on Mumsnet that people want to be paid quickly rather than a few days/weeks after doing a task. It made no sense to me and would never have occured to me had I not read lots of people complaining about it.

In my mind as long as the money arrives eventually what difference does it make? Why not just save a little for a few weeks so you have a buffer, then you won't stress about the timing of payments? And not waste your energy getting angry at people like me who take a few days/weeks to pay while the task works its way up our to-do list. I wouldn't worry at all about a delayed payment (as long as it does eventually arrive) so why would anyone else?

I KNOW from reading Mumsnet that people hate this and therefore I do try to pay promptly. But I still have to consciously remind myself every time

Personally I think the requirement for politicians should be they have worked in a meaningful job full stop - e.g. not just PR or career politician / unions etc. Most people do by definition start out by working in a minimum wage job. It's when it's your whole life that it's a nightmare.

This post is woefully simplistic. There are stupid assumptions made by all sorts of people of all sorts of educational levels / wealth. As much as I object to dumb rich people advice, I also object to the idea that only working class people can ever really know how it 'really is', or are the only ones with morals as is often floated about here.

The most intolerant person I know when it comes to judging people in straightened circumstances is my DH. Born and brought up in a violent very working class family, on one of the worst estates in the country, and went to one of the worst schools (since shut down). He describes half the people he went to school with as lazy nogooders and if he could do well so should they have.

Angela Raynor? Can't say her life experiences (and choices) made her a good politician

On one forum a landlord posted that if Rachel Thieves imposes NI on his earnings he will simply pass it on to his tenants. I asked him "Who are they supposed to pass it on to? They are already paying their own NI and your mortgage. So you are content to allow them to pay what should be your personal taxes as well" His attitude was if they objected they could go buy a house of their own. I see this kind of attitude from a lot of landlords. They speak as though its a hierarchical social relationship rather than a mutually beneficial business arrangement. Im the lord of the manner your the dirty rascal sort of thing.

I'm in this position, my son is very fortunate & would never be able to understand my upbringing (very poor, Council House, parents on benefits etc) but in some way's why would he when he's known nothing but a nice clean home, being able to put the heating on whenever needed, a fridge full of food, holidays, a car, a telephone etc. We should however be proud that we've been able to get out of poverty & create a nice life for our next generation, but it's a tricky balance to not spoil them too much x

I can't judge them for their world view based on their life experience 🤷‍♀️

Growing up, I didn't realise people didn't eat supernoodles for dinner every night and I was genuinely mindblown when as a teen i experienced "homecooked" food like pasta bake from a jar. I had no idea people ate like that because it wanlsnt my norm. I thought it was so exciting and posh!

I'm perversely embarrassed that my kid will grow up thinking that everyone lives in a nice house and eats soughdough as their usual bread and whilst I talk to her about other people having different experiences, I hope that noone judges her from my efforts to do my best, just as I hope noone judges me for what I thought was normal growing up.

All you can do is share your experience and hope that it opens someones world view.

Either way, i choose to see life as it not being about them, it's about being me and my choice to accept that others see things differently and not be oversensitive to others world views.

Yes, but I think thats equally true of everyone. I most probably have absolutely no idea of what it means to live as a disabled person, or a homeless person. All you can try and do is keep your empathy and try to 'get it' and keep reminding yourself that theres so much more to life than your own narrow experience of it.

On MN..your child should have a room, unsuiteswimming pool and room for a pony to themselves, when ordinary families are sharing, parents sleeping in lounges etc. see it all the time. Along with just move, ltb, relocate etc..
Like none of it costs money.

Agree OP, it gets me on property threads when someone says they are thinking of moving to a certain area and have a budget of £300k,and posters pop up saying oh no that area isdreadful, these areas are much nicer - then proceed to name areas which are way outside the OP’s specified budget. As if if the OP can magically produce an extra couple of hundred k from somewhere.

In my experience, most rich people don't even realise they are rich! My friend, who owns three houses and has children attending the most expensive private school in the UK, was moaning to me this morning that 'it would be nice to be rich enough never to have money worries.' My initial thought was 'well, if you put your kids in a state school and lived a little more frugally, you also would not have money worries!' Some people are simply too selfish to understand the realities of those outside their own bubble.

I was brought up in a very poor household, and have worked and probably had a bit of luck along the way and am now comfortable, but far from what I'd consider “rich”; that’s terribly subjective.

I would absolutely still advise someone to buy as soon as they can scrape anything together, the younger the better, even a hovel to do up. I wish I’d had someone to advise me similarly, instead of the implication being I should just get pregnant and get a council flat (as several of my contemporaries did).

A year off for travelling is solidly MC advice and requires far more money IMO than buying somewhere.

Perhaps someone on £26k should rent a room not a whole flat/house.

Wow. My husband is a removals and disposal/handyman/man with a van and sometimes when people take ages to pay we have to use his credit card to buy groceries, which we then pay interest on (that can't be passed on to the payers). God knows what we would do if he didn't have a credit card - saving is just impossible in this climate.

I agree that those on much higher income to most people are totally oblivious to how most people live. It is as if they do not watch the news. Food bank awareness etc. Life is a helluva lot more stressful on much lower incomes.

Of course it is, those threads are always 'why do I bother having this high stress job when I don't get xyz benefit, I could give up work and claim xyz' except they never do, because they know they are significantly better off. They just people 'getting something for free'.

I think some comes down to character but I agree that some people are completely out of touch, especially if they haven't experienced it.

Two examples come to mind:

• the journalist who suggested people eat porridge while she wearing a a pair of £600 shoes.
• A comment on FB where a person suggested struggling single parents forage for food that is "abundant" in the UK. She fondly remembers her nanny taking her to pick mushrooms and having mushrooms on toast for supper apparently. I wish Id screen shot it.

I think you mean ‘sponge off the taxpayer’.