to think people get to het up about the word stupid

[2shoes]

of course to use it again and again would make a child abit
but to class it as a swear word seems.......well stupid
IMO there are a lot worse words out there. and I find the whole "stupid" thing weird.
and ds how many more words are going to become taboo.

Stupid is a word that small children do understand, so in some ways it is worse than swearing, which in general they don't. Also most swearing is fairly meaningless. I wold tell my child off if they said bugger in a normal sort of swearing context (dropped something, or had an accident etc) and I would be very cross if they said a "bad" swear world, but they would (and know this) get a serious telling off if they called each other, or an adult stupid. I'd do the same for ugly, and other derogatory words used in that context. Having had ds beat himself up for being stupid (his words) I can see that it is a term that is very loaded and can cause a lot of hurt. But the word itself is not IMO taboo, just using it to hurt others.

SofiaAmes
you must be incredibly stupid if you have nothing better to do than pick people up on spelling mistakes.(insert apropiate swear words) very childish imo.
I am asking a question as things have changed since ds was little.

2shoes, I'm sorry you missed my point and I think it's a pity that you feel that it's appropriate to call people names and I don't think that if I met you in real life I would chose to associate with you or your children.

I'm about as un PC as they come but I don't agree with anyone using derogatory terms to anyone. it's completely unnecessary small-minded and frankly lazy.

Surely an adult should know the difference between those two words and use them correctly and must be stupid if they don't.

your words not mine. call me stupid I don't care. but I do find it childish to pick people up on their spelling. as for your last words. well.........

Do you mean me saying that DS has an issue with it - he says it is mean and makes him feel sad!

right so
lets pretend a child called fred has done something stupid(i know bear with me)

so do you say
a) fred don't be stupid
or
b) fred that was a stupid thing to do

or can you not use stupid at all?

I wouldn't use it at all.
I would say 'thoughtless, silly, careless, dangerous, hurtful, unkind' etc, but not stupid ? No, because in a child's mind, and most adult's for that matter you are calling THEM stupid not their act, no matter how you phrase it.

B

have to add here. ds is 16 so yes I do call him stupid sometimes but I think at that age he can cope. but would advoid it with dd as she has sn. just want to get it right in my head for the future.

I think I agree with you there kitty.

I do wonder if we are kidding ourselves that our children distinguish between "you are.." and "that was..."

yes TFM, what they hear is "STUPID"

try saying it out loud a few times. it is a really silly word

You are missing the point. You obviously don't like being called stupid for having made a careless mistake. Why on earth do you think that a child would feel good about being called stupid?
I would never actually call anyone stupid; I said that to you to make a point and it has clearly made the point...it's not nice to have someone call you stupid. You don't like it, so don't do it to someone else.

tis me who refers to it as a swear word!!!

and IMO I think it is, but my children do know the difference between that and true swearing, but as quickness and to teach them, I call it swearing.

there are lots of words out there that I do not like tho, and also words that I will use and others do not like, each to there own and all that.....

but

for me and mine, I find they get it if I tell them it is swearing, and when they get older, they start to learn the difference.

their......

SofiaAmes i couldn't give a fig if you call me stupid but I do think you were very childish to pick apart my spelling just to make a point.
if you read my posts on here you will see that I was trying to find out why people objected to the word so much. most people have just answered me. not dissed my spelling and my family.
please grow up.

Psychomum5 thank you for explaining that. it makes sense now.

I say 'derbrain' . Makes ds smile.

I think if it's something serious I would say 'that was a dangerous/silly/annoying/rude thing to do' though. Wouldn't use stupid or variants.

Actually, I think SofiaAmes made the point rather brilliantly. I'm sure she doesn't care at all about your spelling or grammar and would never normally call anyone on it. Also she can't know if you are clever or not without knowing you. But you were clearly very hurt and upset about having it pointed out and being called stupid , which does indicate that it is extremely an extremely hurtful word. Not a swear word, no, but an insult, and I think that an insult is probably much more harmful than a swear word.

And I speak as someone who has found out her child with special needs has been called 'stupid' and 'embarrassing' at a party by another kid.

ffs I don't care that she called me stupid. I would expect that on a thread about the wrod stupid. but i do think it is ignorant to pick people up on their spelling then slag of their family.

The comment about 2shoes's children was .

As rude as calling someone stupid IMO.

But it hurt you, didn't it, to be called stupid? It is hurtful. I know my poor ds with Aspergers was upset to be called 'stupid' and 'embarrassing' by another child. I'd rather he was told to fuck off, frankly. You can shake that off easily. Being called names really gets under your skin, as this thread shows.

I think that its an awful word and possibly worse than a swear word in many ways because its so hurtful.

We don't use it in this house - its a dreadful put down and it really makes me wince when i hear it