Dada always doing nursery run, is he single?

[ByDandyTurtle]

Aibu in thinking he must be single as I never see a woman drop of the child

I want to approach him but unsure

Maybe he has full custody or his wife passed away?

If his child has a different sports day, how do you know the mum isn’t there? Do you see him every day? Otherwise maybe if the mum does do the occasional pickup it’s at a different time to you & unless you saw her with the child then you wouldn’t recognise her?

Teacher, nurse, doctor, retail, sales, police, thousands of jobs she/he could be doing that don't allow time off for sports day, or include travel. Endless list of readons they might not attend. She might be disabled. Doing the school run with their other 6 children, before work.

I couldn’t even tell you who my child’s key worker is? DH does everything nursery because he WFH and I do 12 hour shifts at the hospital. On my days off he still does nursery runs and I do school run for my older child because they are in two different directions.

my youngest starts school next week and NGL I would piss myself laughing if I bumped into a nursery parent who thought DH was single all this time

Maybe she is a teacher. I can’t drop my daughter off at nursery because it opens too late and I am unable to take time off to attend anything in term time.

I know 2 people right now who are very close me/in my life, who recently gave up teaching, last year and this year - both mid to late 30s, and both after about a decade.

One is working for the Government now, and the other is working in management for a big hotel chain (so one has stayed in public service, one has left.) They both get paid more, have full sick leave if they need it, and have much better mental health, and a lot less stress!

And it wasn't because of the children that they left!

You can tell who the posters are on here who know fuck-all about being a teacher. I would love for them to try it for a couple of years. Such rude and ignortant comments (from some!) The 'teachers only work 6 days a week and 37 weeks of the year' one is a favourite of mine. And the idea that they all clock off on say 22nd July, and have 6 weeks of stress free chilling, and then rock up around 5th September, all fresh-faced and raring to go after their massive holiday! Oh, and 'they only work 5 and a half hours a day when they ARE at work too!' 😆

Farcical how little people know about being a teacher. You just KNOW these people would last 5 minutes as a teacher!

I think OP wants to jump his bones so that would be fine!
Op I think you'll just have to start a conversation with him and see if he can reciprocates. Make sure he's single though- one of my dc's friends dads ran off with another school mum, and he would do drop offs as he started work late!

Well good luck to you op. There are some loonies on here.
There were times when my dh wasn't able to do any pick ups etc, but he was still probably known to others.

I mean - my husband has done 99% the drop offs and pick ups as I travel extensively for work and work in different time zones - the mums assumed we were divorced - but no - I just had a very very full on job and was lucky enough he was flexible. It was funny when the mums said they couldn’t invite me out as they already invited my ex husband tho….. 😂

So what. Who cares. Only you it seems.

Seriously?!

My husband did the school run for our son all the way through primary.

He works for himself, flexibly, whereas I teach in a school which is absolutely not flexible.

It isn't because I don't exist! It's because I am working and my hours didn't fit the school run.

Maybe his wife/partner is the same.

Has the OP answered if she assumes that any mum that does all the drop offs, stay and plays, and sport day are single? Or does this only apply to men? She is so conditioned to think that these are mum jobs that she can’t see any alternative.

DS was SAHD for 8 years and did all drop off and collections. He would have loved it had some of the mums been more friendly. Most seemed unwilling to even have a basic chat.

FFS the OPs child is at nursery not school so a teacher could do drop off and picks ups no problem. My sister and BIL, both teachers, do drop off and pick ups from nursery

OP I do think it's unusual for only 1 parent to ever do pickups, sports days etc. The only way to find out is to start talking to him or see if you can get a bit of info from other mums/Internet sleuthing

my brother went to a school nursery, the year before he started school. As did my cousin.

those hours were the same as infants.

My husband does all primary drop offs, and is the one that attends show work days, assembly's and sports days. He is not single 😆

The year before you start school is usually called pre- school, not nursery. Nurseries are open 7.30 - 6pm as a general rule

...and schools usually have breakfast club provisions from 8am. I know several teachers who manage at least some school picks/drops. It's not so weird. While it's wonderful that the dads are so involved, it is slightly unusual to never see the second parent. I was in between jobs fr 3 months, so technically free all the time, but my husband still did some just to get out the house/if I had an interview/something social

And God forbid a “women” wants to initiate friendly contact with a man 🙄

How exactly do you think people get together? Are you so archaic you believe only men are allowed to approach women? Or do you think that online dating is the only allowable way to meet someone?

There’s some ridiculous comments on this post. Yes, it’s entirely possible he’s single. It’s also possible that he’s not. OP there is no harm whatsoever in striking up a conversation with the man to find out more about him, that’s how life works. Ignore the craziness on here.

This thread is ridiculous and there’s an air of misogyny about it too. Of course no one would be saying it’s ‘odd’ if the mum did all the nursery runs, but because it’s a man doing it then suddenly there’s judgement on the mother?! Such bollocks.

OP all you can do is strike up a conversation. General chit chat at first 🙂 Ask questions that would leave it open to mention partner/spouse. There is nothing wrong with finding someone attractive and wondering if they are single when you are single. Think you are getting a bit of a hard time tbh !

At least you'll know and can move on if it's a no go !

She's not intending to initiate friendly contact though, is she?

OP hasn't even said she's intending to do this (so this isn't a criticism of her) but striking up a "friendship" with someone when your sole intention is sexual/romantic is actually predatory behaviour. It's something men do to women and is called out a lot on here (and in real life) and rightly so. It's the attitude of "I was nice to her so now she owes me sex".

Regardless, the question OP has asked is whether she's unreasonable to assume, solely because he does the nursery runs, he's single. She is unreasonable to assume that because there are so many (far more likely) explanations.

My DP does 95% of nursery drop off and pick ups, not because he is single, but because I am the main earner and work longer hours in a demanding role. He’s also happy to do so!

I can guarantee you would not assume a woman was single if it was her doing all drop off/pick ups which is just another annoying example of casual sexism

Just checking "and frantically note taking" these serious rules on initiating contact with the opposite sex! Its so complicated these days, I guess the only way forward is the Internet, where you know them so well with their honest and true to life profiles right?

Its called chatting someone up?? Is that now predatory in this day an age? My God im sooo outdated with all of this!! 😫