If you didn’t send your child to nursery ?

[OJR]

What was your reasons? Did you get judged for it ?

I didn't send my kids to preschool or daycare because I think being home is in general better for them, and the job I had pre-children would have meant 10 hour days for them between work and commute.

No one ever said anything to me about it, but most would probably know I wouldn't care about what they thought.

I’d agree it’s essential for the functioning of a classroom. The reality is whether you agree with it or not, school is what school is, so why not go prepare for it.

Because they learn what school 'is' when they're there.

If all you want is for them to conform there'll be plenty of time for that, why start it any earlier?

Why the obsession with nursery being seen as teaching “conforming”, children can learn to sit down & play in a group in nursery and still have loads of fun - themes of the week, movie days, arts & crafts, trips out, baking, dress up etc

People seem to forget that there’s something called “Reception”…..

None of mine went.

The first one, we travelled a lot and he was going to be home educated anyway. He didn’t go anywhere until he started school age 9.

Second, no need. I was at home and she was a lovely, easy child. I ran all the local playgroups and activities , so she was out at them with me a few times a week and we had loads of friends her age. She went to school for reception.

3rd, she’s late August born. Again, I am at home, there wasn’t much point. She started reception a week after turning 4.

All have been just fine. No issues with any of them.

I was told I was going all sorts of damage by not sending them to nursery. Put my 23 year old, 11 year old and 5 year olds in a line up with children who did go to nursery and I’d give you a million pounds if you can pick them out from the ones who did go.

Yes.
Reception Year is meant to be the preparation for school.
My girl also did a year at Nursery Class in the school at age 3 (3 hours in the morning).
So nursery class at the school (aka Foundation Stage 1) was her preparation for being away from me, gain a bit of independence, hang out with her peers etc.
Back in my day (early 80s) that was called "going to playgroup" and many 3 year olds went. The only difference was it wasn't 5 days a week - probably twice a week.
Then you have Reception (aka Foundation Stage 2) and this is the more formal school style setting where children start getting "school ready".
In my day this was called "still going to playgroup" until the term after you turned 5 and off to school you went.
Foundation Stage IS the preparation for school. You don't need preparation before that.

Mine went to their school pre-school class at three for half days are we counting that as nursery?

As babies I worked part time, DH worked compressed hours and my parents had them a few days a week so no need for nursery but if I had to use it I would have and wouldn’t have cared one bit if people judged me or not.

Never went to nursery I was a SAHM to my 4. They went to playschool term time 5 mornings a week September before starting school.

Bit different if parents are present though

When I first opened the thread I thought I was going to be about not attending nursery) preschool etc until school age.

I was replying to the broader theme of the exchange - a poster who was saying that preschool is essential to get children 'classroom ready' and that schools are they way they are so why not get them used to it early.

We didn’t send our daughter- I choose to take 4 years off work. During that time I planned my business. My husband also reduced to part time (he is a consultant so choose his hours) so he would take a project for a few weeks and then take a few weeks off. Our daughter is now 10 and she speaks 3 languages fluently and is 2-4 years ahead of expected academic levels for her age depending on subject. She has just started senior school and had no issues when she started school. It was the best decision we made and we were financially comfortable enough to do this- and I would never swap those years. I never got judgement to my face from people we know but didn’t stop random strangers. I wasn’t anxious I just thought I could do a way better job of caring and educating her than a nursery or childminder. But I have never passed judgement on others choices by BF got a nanny and went back to work at 3 months and that suited her and her family.

Interesting thread. DD doesn't go to nursery at all. I work part time 2 days a week (my DM has DD those two days). My DM and husbands DM were both SAHMs and we always planned that I would do the same. We might send DD to preschool once she turns 3 just for the social aspect but that's still TBC.

How did people manage to grow into socialised human beings in the times when nursery wasn't something that existed yet?

They grew up in a more communal environment and families were larger.