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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think people who say they cant live without there car are stupid ?

345 replies

lins1uk · 31/05/2008 00:37

havent got a car yet, my dp is taking lessons and will be getting a car when he passes but people who say they cant live without there car are surely stupid ?
havent they heard of the bus or tram etc ?
i have two kids and one on the way and i will still use public transport when we have a car!
plus i walk 25 mins to school and 25 mins back twice a day i just think people who rely on there car for everything are just plain lazy,
i agree it is nice to have a car but its not everything!
sorry if you feel diffrent but thats how i feel!

OP posts:
HonoriaGlossop · 31/05/2008 17:56

that's a good point of janni's, having your life set up locally of course makes things alot easier. I am constantly trawling the papers for jobs near my home!

unfortunately when you need a certain amount of money to make ends meet there are not that many options locally (we don't live in a city).

I have a little dream of myself working at DS' school as a teaching assistant; no stress, no travelling, being able to use our local high street instead of driving past the shops morning and evening when they're closed! If only that sort of job were paid at a decent level.....

tortoiseSHELL · 31/05/2008 17:57

In a society which assumes you have a car, you can't manage without one.

For example, the children go to a gymnastics club on a Wednesday. They have to be there and changed for 4:00. It is 3 or 4 miles to get there. 3 children can not walk 4 miles in 30 mins, there is NO bus to get there. Now maybe it is a luxury for them to go to gym. But they love it, it is good for them, the leadership is inspirational, so I would be loathe to stop them going.

But if society (and specifically the council) didn't assume everyone had a car, then there would be a reliable bus route to get there. We have a bus stop just round the corner from our house. But I would have to go to the out of town shopping centre! And nowhere else...

Dh cycles every day to work. I walk whenever possible. But I COULD NOT manage without the car.

For example, part of my work is playing the organ at a church, 3 miles across town. I have to be there at 8:30, I simply CANNOT rely on public transport to get me there - there is none. And if I don't get there, then the service doesn't happen.

HonoriaGlossop · 31/05/2008 17:58

oh Gawd I am going to put myself in a box so I can't offend anyone else

'no stress' for a teaching assistant?!

I meant no stress in terms of being in twenty different locations in one day and dealing with traffic, etc

hunkermunker · 31/05/2008 17:58

I don't really feel the need to justify our single car ownership on here, but suffice to say our lives would be impossible to manage without it and no, I'm not stupid.

wulfricsmummy · 31/05/2008 18:07

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Message withdrawn

WanderingTrolley · 31/05/2008 18:10

Can someone give a quick summary of this thread before I rant gently put my point across? Pretty please?

cory · 31/05/2008 18:16

blueshoes on Sat 31-May-08 17:19:07
"OP, you only say this because you don't have a car yet. Of course, at this point, you think you are doing fine. It is like wearing blinkers. Until you take them off, how do you know what you are missing?"

I don't want to associate myself with the OP in any way; I found her post very arrogant and self-satisfied.

At the same time, I do want to point out that there are those of us who feel that if we can organise our lives in such a way that we don't need a family car, then we are happy to be able to do this for environmental reasons. In that sense, I'd rather wear my blinkers. I don't need those extra horizons. I had rather pollution levels were kept down than that I found myself some wonderful new options to do.

Though admittedly, if dd's disability worsens, then we may eventually have come to the end of the road on this one.

Enid · 31/05/2008 18:20

lol this is a wind up surely

we have a bus 1 x week

and am 3 miles from nearest shop

and I have three children

sarah293 · 31/05/2008 18:22

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Message withdrawn

WanderingTrolley · 31/05/2008 18:23

Is it a troll?

Enid · 31/05/2008 18:24

anyway I couldnt live without driving very fast with loud music on

one of life's underrated pleasures

sarah293 · 31/05/2008 18:26

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WanderingTrolley · 31/05/2008 18:28

Has anyone said wind yer neck in/mind yer own/why is your dp learning to drive when you can give him a lift on yer high horse there?

sarah293 · 31/05/2008 18:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Enid · 31/05/2008 18:31

riven we cope by using our car less or car sharing

Quattrocento · 31/05/2008 18:32

lol at buys hummer

Mamazon · 31/05/2008 18:33

I always thought i couldn't survive without a car.
I live in a new town so although there are buses they aren't as regular as in the large cities and they are very expensive.

I have a 7 year old with autism so its hard when its busey as he gets very upset with large crowds, he isn't very good at waiting and he just cannot sit still for any length of time.
plus i have a 3 year old who is a typical pre schooler who just doesn't want to sit quietly.

DS's school is 4 miles away and the equivelant of a 40 minute walk with DS as a lot of it is up steep hills.

BUT i have been without a car now for 2 months....and we are still managing. its not easy and i have had to change the way i shop, the places we go and the things we do, But we have survived.

It is possible

jingleyjen · 31/05/2008 18:33

I could live without a car.. I don't want to...
I am within 5 miles from several supermarkets so I can get delivery.
I have a village shop and DS's school is 1 mile from the house.
HOWEVER, I want to be able to get out of the village, and the bus route is crap.
We have cut down our car usage as the petrol prices have gone up and guess we will have to cut down more as it rockets further.

sweetkitty · 31/05/2008 18:38

If you have ever stood in the pouring rain getting soaked and watched 3 buses drive past as none of them will let you on with a double buggy then you would know it's not as easy as all that. Or walked for 40 minutes each way with a toddler in the rain?

Sod that I will drive and ignore people like you.

kittywise · 31/05/2008 18:47

cars are useful but we should WALK whenever possible, make more time to get places more slowly by walking.

A bit more walking might get rid of some of the horrible muffin tops wobbling around the place.

Mind you with oil prices the way they are I think people will be walking a lot more than they are now. ( good)

cazboldy · 31/05/2008 18:48

riven - I wonder how rural dwellers will cope too

especially ones like us with oil ch aswell.

and we live in a tied house that goes with dh's job

this month I have spent more on diesel than on food

and my oil DD is £212 a month

the diesel and oil dd is currently a third of our income............

Our only saving grace is that we pay no rent or council tax

hunkermunker · 31/05/2008 18:52

I live in a London suburb, btw.

I am looking out of the front of the house and I can see nine cars just moving my head side to side. One is ours.

But without getting us all up at 5am and not getting home till 8pm, we need the car.

Or should I move house/jobs/schools in order not to be called "stupid"?

It's legal to have a car. Until it isn't, I'll take grammar/spelling ability over non-car-ownership any day

hunkermunker · 31/05/2008 18:52

Make that ten cars. There's one peeping over a hedge at me, cheeky little devil.

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 31/05/2008 18:57

Yes well.

I live in a rural area and doubt there is a tram in a 50mile radius. I work shifts in a hospital - there is no way any public transport will get me there at 7:00am or take me home after 10:00pm.

8 miles would be a bit far for me to walk or bike.

My dy commutes for 1hr20 (each way) from one rural area to another rural area - again no public transport links at all.

We don't all live in a metropolis you know.

I think you're been quite precious and very naieve.

mylittlepudding · 31/05/2008 19:01

Lazy and uneducated maybe. Stupid, erm, no.

We don't have a car, and I have a 'professional' job. I am sick of people looking down on me for it. I get an hour and forty minutes aerobic exercise a day, and during the week I am effectively a single parent. No way could I do that otherwise. I can save for my DDs higher education. I am also saving to take unpaid leave when my mum becomes terminally ill (probably won't be long).

How do we get this? By choices. We choose to live and work in areas that are commutable. We choose to budget for taxis if they are required to get us to our nearest and dearest. We choose to live near enough to the hospital required for my health issues. I would love to live somewhere rural and commute by car... or would I? Maybe I have chosen, for my family's sake, to prioritise different things.

I don't look down on anyone else's choices... but it sometimes angers me if some people claim not to have them.