Territorial dispute in swimming pool

[tamade]

I am lucky enough to have a proper lunch break and at least three times a week I go to a nearby hotel and swim a mile, sometimes 2km.

Today I was alone in the pool and started swimming in lane two (of four) which is one lane away from the side closest to the changing rooms entrance. About 30 min later a man got in and stated to swim in lane 1. Five minutes after that he changed into my lane. I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. Not long after I finished up and went to get changed. Before exiting I looked back and sure enough he had moved back into lane two, which I presume is "his". And based on that I believe that he was trying to claim lane 2 when he initially moved in.

He is another regular I have seen him coming as I am going although we don't usually use the pool at the same time.

I think this is knobish behaviour

I think I should add that the lanes are not massively wide, about 1 or 2 feet wider than a full arm-span. So sharing is possible but not exactly convenient for passing. I can't see why anyone would want to share except during busy times.

Manspreading at its finest.

Surely it's easier to accidentally kick someone in the balls than in the face.

'These men'. 🫣

Actually no, it’s surprisingly hard to get an accurate punch, kick there, they just end up with an inner thigh bruise.

But he was a dick. He entered an otherwise empty pool, choosing the lane already occupied by a female swimmer. His intentions were clear, however she didn’t let him bully her out of the way so he moved. It was still a dick move on his part. The normal thing for him to have done would be select any of the other three available lanes.

That isn't what I meant at all. I mentioned his return to lane 2 because it is evidence that he prefers it or considers it "his". And if that is true it suggests that his motive was to get me to move lanes.

I would be willing bet that if I had started my session in lane 3 he would have gone into 2 and stayed there.

YANBU. I swim every lunchtime with a lot of very aggy swimmers. I find people do have a preferred lane, I certainly do, but if someone is already in it you don’t make their water more choppy by deliberately going in it (this is also why lanes have different turning circles). I vote he thought you would be slower and he could force you over to the other ‘slower’ lane (even if not marked) then had to move when he realised you were not. For those who think it doesn’t matter, in my 2 years of lunchtime swimming I’ve learned to spot the ones like this (always men) who more often than not end up causing crashes in the pool. One territorial guy literally swam at a lady doing a turn a few days ago, luckily no one was hurt or but it really freaked her out.

Well you seem to consider it yours🤷

He was being a twat. Men acting like this really put me off swimming. Also the ones who do backstroke and hit you.

He doesn't consider it his any more than you consider it yours.

Yes…these men.

The men who sit next to a woman on an empty train carriage.

The men who try to use the proximity of their (usually larger) bodies to edge us out of our spaces or to make us feel uncomfortable. And they are used to too many women doing what they want because women have been conditioned to “be nice”.

These men.

Women can be twats in the pool too.
Nobody owns a lane.
For the record, every single person who has backstroked into me has also been female. One actual took a chunk out of me with her too sharp nails.

Hmmm, how about 'these women', who make grand assumptions based on one territorial swimmer's anecdote.
Sigh.

Which has got nothing to do with two people in a swimming pool ,he moved out of the lane so going by your logic he's not one of those men.

He literally got into a pool with one swimmer and went into the occupied lane.

100% part of the these men brigade.

Have you ever heard of the lift experiment?

Research shows that when up to six people who do not know each other are in the same lift, they will instinctively arrange themselves in the same pattern as the spots on a die.

This is because humans naturally like to have as much personal space as is possible in the circumstances.

In situations where there is a small number of people in a large space, and those people are not known to each other and do not have any reason to need to talk to each other, one person choosing to position themselves close to the other person is unusual, unnatural behaviour, particularly if they are a man and the other person is a woman.

We all understand on some level that we do not want random strangers in our personal space and they do not want us in theirs, and most of us try to respect this unwritten social rule.

There are some exceptions. For example, if I was out running one evening and I saw another lone female runner, I might try to stay reasonably close to her for mutual protection, without necessarily interacting with her.

Honestly so what? Do you go looking for things to annoy and upset you?

Have you deliberately ignored every other aspect of what happened?

The lane isn't 'her personal space', it's a public space.

Such as the fact that he moved over when it became clear that the OP wasn't just going to move out of the lane HE wanted?

Are you being deliberately obtuse or does it come naturally?

The fact is that he moved over.
You added the rest.

What about my statement isn't factual?

And he got out of it very quickly .