Page 13 | Territorial dispute in swimming pool

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 11:57

Cycleaway · 26/08/2025 11:43

I know they don’t. I completely accept the possibility in that a busy or somewhat populated pool that that could very plausibly happen with absolutely no ill-intent. And I’m sure that your son swims very respectfully. I don’t remember questioning that

But that isn’t what this is. It was one woman swimming. A man got in, who was very likely put out that he couldn’t swim in his normal lane, and instead of shrugging his shoulders and moving to a different lane just this once, he swam right under her.

You can rationalise this all you like, justify his behaviour with a 100m swimming badge, whatever. But I personally feel that if the person who was actually there tells you how they felt in that situation then maybe, just maybe, you should believe them.

And I’m not an idiot

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He swam under her to get out of the lane.

He didn’t enforce his right to be there and get in her way. He moved. Then moved back when it was free.

Thats totally the opposite of forceful intimidation.

The OP just doesn’t like the fact he went in that lane because she wanted it to herself and went back because he also wanted that lane to himself.

Of people have such an issue with sharing a space with people who may or may not behave as they feel they should they should book private spaces.

The real world doesn’t work how the OP wanted it to.

I watched a whole pool full of swimmers for 1.5 hours ( at stupid o clock this morning 🫣😂) and it’s amazing how 20 kids aged 13-21 both make and female managed to swim without the drama MN likes to find. Even changing lanes when a certain set wasn’t their strongest or dropping under for someone to overtake because it’s their week stroke/drill.

If a bunch of kids can do it so should a couple of grown arse adults be able to. 🤷‍♀️

ilovesushi · 26/08/2025 12:00

He sounds like a twat. No need to swim so close to you - and to swim under you - what!!!!

I've just started swimming again and the politics of the lane thing confuses the hell out of me. Last time I went there were two lanes labelled fast and medium. I would have gone to medium but there was a woman doing a very strong and fast front crawl up and down. She was the only one in the lane and the fast lane was empty. I was feeling a bit awkward anyway being quite new to the pool, so ended up swimming lengths in the public swim area, which was fine but required a bit of dodging around people.

PhuckTrump · 26/08/2025 12:03

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 11:37

Who knows? It’s like why do people park next to you in a car park when there’s millions of empty spaces elsewhere?

Im guessing because most humans aren’t MNers and manage to live their lives with the presence of others quite happily without it becoming a drama 😉

I mean we are talking about the place where someone cannot visit without a 6 week warning and calender check, text to check it’s happening, text to say they’ve left , a window at which it’s suitable to arrive in etc.

Meanwhile in the real world ……

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It is also a dickhead move to park right next to a car in an empty carpark. They may have bags or small children to load. Common consideration.

dizzydizzydizzy · 26/08/2025 12:05

I was a lifeguard for several years. It is usually but not always men who think they own a lane and get VERY offended when a woman overtakes them. I have had to sort out arguments about this in tbe past.

Since it was a hotel, I'm guessing there might not have been a lifeguard. If the pool is nearly empty and somebody gets in the same lane as someone else, I used to tell them to switch lanes.

Lifeguards should promote good etiquette. Eg tell swimmers to wait at the end of the lane if the other swimmers are faster than them and have caught up.

KrisAkabusi · 26/08/2025 12:06

RightOnTheEdge · 26/08/2025 10:53

I think swimming under you instead of waiting two seconds was awful, I would have hated that and felt really uncomfortable.

I don't really care if club swimmers do that all the time. Do it at your club, but it's very rude to do it to random, unsuspecting swimmers in a public session.
It's especially ignorant if it's a man doing it to a woman. I suspect he wouldnt have done it if the OP was a man.

He swam under her to get out of the way. What were his other options? If he had waited two seconds she would have swum into him.

"I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. "

I still can't see what he did wrong here. As soon as he realised she was swimming towards him he got out of the way and out of the lane. Considering he's been accused of being a perve multiple times in this thread for swimming under her, I'm sure he'd be accused of the same thing if he hadn't moved and she'd crashed into him.

JackKillianthenighthawk · 26/08/2025 12:06

tamade · 26/08/2025 07:46

it's the moving back into lane 2 as soon as I got out though, I get not wanting to swim next to a wall or ladders but lane 3 is also open on both sides so why not continue there after I got out? my conclusion is that he lane 2 is his fave and he made a passive aggressive play for it right from the off.

I could be wrong but I like to work out how peoples minds work

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Presuming both lanes 1, 2 and 3 were empty? sorry if you've confirmed this later.

That is weird behaviour. I would have been annoyed at that. So it's like he expected you to leave lane 2 when he got into lane 2 and the big underwater push-off was to make a point. And him returning to lane 2 after you left confirmed this. Bit dickish. Keep swimming lane 2 😂

I used to go to a gym where I liked a particular treadmill as I felt I could keep going on it longer 😂so would go right next to someone in a row of 8 treadmills when there were others free 😂 wouldn't do that now. People must have wondered why I did that at the time.

thinklagoon · 26/08/2025 12:09

Alwayssnacking · 26/08/2025 08:43

Nothing to do with him being a man 🤣. Totally random adding that In. His actions are odd, why go into her lane in the first place ??

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It’s not HER lane! Perhaps he usually swims somewhere with lanes by speed and lane 2 is usually his speed. Perhaps it was habit. Perhaps he didn’t see OP. Once he did, he moved out of the lane without interrupting her swim.

viques · 26/08/2025 12:09

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 26/08/2025 07:50

The only dickish thing men do at my local DL pool, is a very noisy, splashy, inexpert front crawl. Whenever I hear the racket it makes, I just know it’ll be a bloke.

In our pool the splashy noisy front crawlers often have to have a little ( 5 minute at least) rest at the end of every length as they have used up all their precious testosterone in one go.

I love people watching at the pool, there is one poseur who you rarely see swim but is often to be found doing fancy handstands or complicated stretches to get in or out of the pool. He does have a very shapely body I have to admit. Then there is Mr Half a Length who is prone to stopping suddenly, so watch out for him. The Bouncing ladies who stand and chat at the side while bobbing up and down . I also like seeing Miss Prep, who spends at least ten minutes sorting out her hat, her goggles, her ear buds her funny swim faster flippers……

Who says swimming is boring!

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 12:14

PhuckTrump · 26/08/2025 12:03

It is also a dickhead move to park right next to a car in an empty carpark. They may have bags or small children to load. Common consideration.

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They may. But if the car park was full they’d still have those kids and bags and have to deal with it!

I refer you back to people wanting others to follow some unwritten rules rather than a need.

It annoys me when people park next to me when there’s others spaces but I accept they have as much right to be there as me and don’t assume it’s because they are a dick.

In fact the only people I label dicks in car parks are the ones who are “just gonna be a minute” in disabled space’s (without a BB) because ds cannot get in and out the car with his wheelchair in a normal space.

Most if not stems from the change in humans behaviour whereby everyone feels they are entitled to have a space how they want it. Tolerance of anyone else is dwindling.

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 12:15

KrisAkabusi · 26/08/2025 12:06

He swam under her to get out of the way. What were his other options? If he had waited two seconds she would have swum into him.

"I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. "

I still can't see what he did wrong here. As soon as he realised she was swimming towards him he got out of the way and out of the lane. Considering he's been accused of being a perve multiple times in this thread for swimming under her, I'm sure he'd be accused of the same thing if he hadn't moved and she'd crashed into him.

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👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Exactly. But why let the truth and a sensible solution get in the way of a good man bashing thread?!

BoogieBoogieWoogie · 26/08/2025 12:17

PrivateMusic · 26/08/2025 10:11

She was already using it ffs!

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Until she wasn’t. And yet she still found an issue with him moving into the empty lane

MzHz · 26/08/2025 12:19

GleisZwei · 26/08/2025 11:10

I've swam loads.
As a female I often find fellow females more annoying than males.

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I’m a swimmer in a competitive squad. If I’m ever in a public pool session it’s so often ruined either by a bloke unable to cope that a middle aged woman swims far faster than him (Even worse when I was fat AND old) or a woman getting into the lane im in, who wither can’t judge speed, or swims heads up breaststroke because there is a bloke in the slow lane.

i have told blokes that they might be better suited to a slower lane, it doesn’t go down well. I hate public swimming sessions

i Find that club swimmers in public sessions DONT behave like this. But they do get pissed off if they’re rightly in the fast lane and some wannabe triathlete in baggy swim trunks gets in their lane. The best way to deal with people like this is to swim fast, don’t stop and make the point that they are in the way.

what this bloke did to @tamade is idiotic

what swimmer in their right mind will LEAVE an empty lane they have all to themselves to get into a lane with another person in it? Answer: none. A lane to yourself is perfection itself to a swimmer.

this dick was doing it on purpose because he wanted @tamade lane. Which he could have had first if he’d been there earlier and if it was free.

I think I’d have said, “mate I’m training here, there are 3 other lanes, we don’t need to share”

MzHz · 26/08/2025 12:20

BoogieBoogieWoogie · 26/08/2025 12:17

Until she wasn’t. And yet she still found an issue with him moving into the empty lane

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Only because it confirmed what she thought; that he was trying to bustle her out of the lane she was in.

Bonden · 26/08/2025 12:31

If she’d said, “I was sitting on one of three empty benches in a park … man came sat in another bench for a minute then sat on same bench as me then went back to his first bench”, the nasty nature of his behaviour and old be far clearer to all. He’s a turd

BoogieBoogieWoogie · 26/08/2025 12:39

MzHz · 26/08/2025 12:20

Only because it confirmed what she thought; that he was trying to bustle her out of the lane she was in.

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Maybe. Or maybe it just confirmed it’s his preferred lane (just as it is hers) and once it was empty he moved back into it. Who knows 🤷🏼
Wonder if OP would move to her preferred lane if it later became free

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 26/08/2025 12:40

I think swimming under another swimmer in a lane in a swimming pool is either a bit aggressive or a bit showboaty. I wouldn't have liked that at all. The normal thing to do would be to wait a few seconds for OP to get out of the way. But I really hate lane swimming anyway (being too fast for the slow lane but slightly too slow for the medium lane) and it's one of the reasons why I swim outdoors as late in the year as I can.

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 12:43

Bonden · 26/08/2025 12:31

If she’d said, “I was sitting on one of three empty benches in a park … man came sat in another bench for a minute then sat on same bench as me then went back to his first bench”, the nasty nature of his behaviour and old be far clearer to all. He’s a turd

See I wouldn’t give that headspace either!

Id just carry on with what I was doing - usually drinking a coffee with my kindle 😂

itsgettingweird · 26/08/2025 12:44

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 26/08/2025 12:40

I think swimming under another swimmer in a lane in a swimming pool is either a bit aggressive or a bit showboaty. I wouldn't have liked that at all. The normal thing to do would be to wait a few seconds for OP to get out of the way. But I really hate lane swimming anyway (being too fast for the slow lane but slightly too slow for the medium lane) and it's one of the reasons why I swim outdoors as late in the year as I can.

But he swam under her because the OP herself said he suddenly saw her swimming directly at him so he went under and into a different lane.

I mean - he could have stayed put so she swam right into him.

That thread would be interesting 😉

GleisZwei · 26/08/2025 12:50

MzHz · 26/08/2025 12:19

I’m a swimmer in a competitive squad. If I’m ever in a public pool session it’s so often ruined either by a bloke unable to cope that a middle aged woman swims far faster than him (Even worse when I was fat AND old) or a woman getting into the lane im in, who wither can’t judge speed, or swims heads up breaststroke because there is a bloke in the slow lane.

i have told blokes that they might be better suited to a slower lane, it doesn’t go down well. I hate public swimming sessions

i Find that club swimmers in public sessions DONT behave like this. But they do get pissed off if they’re rightly in the fast lane and some wannabe triathlete in baggy swim trunks gets in their lane. The best way to deal with people like this is to swim fast, don’t stop and make the point that they are in the way.

what this bloke did to @tamade is idiotic

what swimmer in their right mind will LEAVE an empty lane they have all to themselves to get into a lane with another person in it? Answer: none. A lane to yourself is perfection itself to a swimmer.

this dick was doing it on purpose because he wanted @tamade lane. Which he could have had first if he’d been there earlier and if it was free.

I think I’d have said, “mate I’m training here, there are 3 other lanes, we don’t need to share”

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Public lane swimming isn't for 'training' though. Sounds like you're the issue.
HTH

JifNtGif · 26/08/2025 12:57

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 26/08/2025 10:12

It makes it already occupied.

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Please don't make this political

limescale · 26/08/2025 13:22

i Find that club swimmers in public sessions DONT behave like this. But they do get pissed off if they’re rightly in the fast lane and some wannabe triathlete in baggy swim trunks gets in their lane. The best way to deal with people like this is to swim fast, don’t stop and make the point that they are in the way.

Don't worry.....I know my place.
I don't wear baggy swimming trunks and I am not a club swimmer. I am relatively new to swimming (I'm a runner really). I am keen and I do train for various personal challenges (an open water swim, a couple of sprint tris, the Serpentine swim next month) but I am not very fast - I'd say between the fast and middle lane speed.

I like to swim up and down without distraction. If the fast lane looks suitable then I will get in there. Suitable means maybe 3 or 4 other swimmers who are well able to accommodate different speeds if they abide by the lane rules. Sure someone might have to wait at the end for a few seconds but that's the nature of public swim sessions.

If a club swimmer jumps in and catches me up in the space of a single length and makes a point of me being in the way then it really pisses me off. Give me a chance to get to the end and duck under to the middle lane.

BallerinaRadio · 26/08/2025 13:52

I bet the bloke would be astounded this 'incident' (🙄) has hit 13 pages on Mumsnet. Like I said above he probably didn't even realise anything had happened.

If anything he probably thought he'd been graceful in moving lanes.

We need to find him get his point of view instead of all the clairvoyants on here 😂😂

Tankinthegarden · 26/08/2025 13:56

Maybe the gentleman concerned was neuro divergent and trying to cope with a change in his plan?

Active13 · 26/08/2025 14:10

tamade · 26/08/2025 06:54

I am lucky enough to have a proper lunch break and at least three times a week I go to a nearby hotel and swim a mile, sometimes 2km.

Today I was alone in the pool and started swimming in lane two (of four) which is one lane away from the side closest to the changing rooms entrance. About 30 min later a man got in and stated to swim in lane 1. Five minutes after that he changed into my lane. I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. Not long after I finished up and went to get changed. Before exiting I looked back and sure enough he had moved back into lane two, which I presume is "his". And based on that I believe that he was trying to claim lane 2 when he initially moved in.

He is another regular I have seen him coming as I am going although we don't usually use the pool at the same time.

I think this is knobish behaviour

I agree....knobish behaviour.
Particularly as he swam underneath you when there was no need.

Widower2014 · 26/08/2025 15:35

Had exactly the same when a woman got in the same lane as me,. complaining I was swimming too slow when there was 3 other lanes available.

Guess it's entitlement