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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Territorial dispute in swimming pool

487 replies

tamade · 26/08/2025 06:54

I am lucky enough to have a proper lunch break and at least three times a week I go to a nearby hotel and swim a mile, sometimes 2km.

Today I was alone in the pool and started swimming in lane two (of four) which is one lane away from the side closest to the changing rooms entrance. About 30 min later a man got in and stated to swim in lane 1. Five minutes after that he changed into my lane. I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. Not long after I finished up and went to get changed. Before exiting I looked back and sure enough he had moved back into lane two, which I presume is "his". And based on that I believe that he was trying to claim lane 2 when he initially moved in.

He is another regular I have seen him coming as I am going although we don't usually use the pool at the same time.

I think this is knobish behaviour

OP posts:
pestowithwalnuts · 26/08/2025 06:56

So where's the dispute ?
He just swam in the same as you for a bit and then swapped to the one the he prepared after you left it

KrisAkabusi · 26/08/2025 06:56

And? What a non-event. Man goes into your lane, sees you're still using it, so leaves.

Original poster
tamade · 26/08/2025 06:58

I think he expected me to relinquish it to him

OP posts:
Billybagpuss · 26/08/2025 06:58

Always men. I was swimming up and down by a lane rope in a pool where they didn’t have full lanes set out just a mid way divider to separate kids play are from swimming area. A bloke watched me do probably around 20 lengths then got in and started swimming towards me on the same line, he literally did 2 lengths then stopped at the wall and man spread himself across my turning area. I’m cross with myself for not saying anything. Roll on winter when they go back to the indoor pool.

Mom2526 · 26/08/2025 06:59

Yes I had a similar experience with a man who got in after me swimming at me, I think trying to drive me to the edge of the pool where the ladders are. I think he thought I would just move.

Blueuggboots · 26/08/2025 06:59

But he moved?

Icedlatteplease · 26/08/2025 07:17

He moved.

Yes men can be a dick in pools but doesn't sound like he was. Most pools have a faster medium slower (depends on the lane number of lanes in the pool) sounds like he was adjusting where he swam based on the relative speed which appears your pool has the same system. If you were going that much faster than him, sound like you should have been in the fast lane in the first place.

I'd have been fuming if I'd been forced to swim in the slow lane because someone who was swimming fast lane pace decided this was their lane and they were sticking to it

JifNtGif · 26/08/2025 07:21

Could you book lessons to improve technique if too slow ?

Hiddendisability12 · 26/08/2025 07:34

In our lanes in the pool you have to swim anti clockwise which I was doing prior to a man getting in the pool. I take a slow breast stroke and wait at one end for someone to pass if they are faster then me. This cretin gets in and starts swimming wih a powerful front crawl directly at me. I let it go a couple of times then thought no fuck this I'm tired of men thinking they take up all the room so I stood my ground and ploughed straight into me and shouted at him to watch where he was going he got out of the pool stupid dickheads.

BallerinaRadio · 26/08/2025 07:37

There's a lot of assumptions here for a fairly innocuous... Well it's barely an incident never mind a dispute.

If anyone was being territorial I'd say it was probably you being in lane 2 of an empty pool, why not lane 1?

SisterMarie · 26/08/2025 07:38

tamade · 26/08/2025 06:58

I think he expected me to relinquish it to him

Probably not as he moved....youre just assuming he thought that.

CliantheLang · 26/08/2025 07:39

SisterMarie · 26/08/2025 07:38

Probably not as he moved....youre just assuming he thought that.

Show quote history

He shouldn't have been in her lane, at all.

Fifthtimelucky · 26/08/2025 07:41

JifNtGif · 26/08/2025 07:21

Could you book lessons to improve technique if too slow ?

If the OP is swimming 1m - 2km in her lunch break she doesn’t sound particularly slow!

But I agree with some others that this was a bit of a non-event.

RhaenysRocks · 26/08/2025 07:41

Icedlatteplease · 26/08/2025 07:17

He moved.

Yes men can be a dick in pools but doesn't sound like he was. Most pools have a faster medium slower (depends on the lane number of lanes in the pool) sounds like he was adjusting where he swam based on the relative speed which appears your pool has the same system. If you were going that much faster than him, sound like you should have been in the fast lane in the first place.

I'd have been fuming if I'd been forced to swim in the slow lane because someone who was swimming fast lane pace decided this was their lane and they were sticking to it

There was noone else there though.

Original poster
tamade · 26/08/2025 07:41

Icedlatteplease · 26/08/2025 07:17

He moved.

Yes men can be a dick in pools but doesn't sound like he was. Most pools have a faster medium slower (depends on the lane number of lanes in the pool) sounds like he was adjusting where he swam based on the relative speed which appears your pool has the same system. If you were going that much faster than him, sound like you should have been in the fast lane in the first place.

I'd have been fuming if I'd been forced to swim in the slow lane because someone who was swimming fast lane pace decided this was their lane and they were sticking to it

There were only two people in the pool, before he came I was alone. The lanes are not graded.

OP posts:
GCAcademic · 26/08/2025 07:42

Were you a faster swimmer than him OP? That does seem to make some male swimmers very angry indeed.

Largeherbivore · 26/08/2025 07:43

Lane 2 is obviously the superior lane if everyone wants to swim in it. So the pool is at fault for not having more second lanes. They should replace lanes 1,3 and 4 with more 2s.

BallerinaRadio · 26/08/2025 07:43

CliantheLang · 26/08/2025 07:39

He shouldn't have been in her lane, at all.

Show quote history

But it wasn't 'her' lane. Like I say the only bringing up territory is the OP. Everything else is just assumptions.

GreenWheat · 26/08/2025 07:44

This all seems rather petty. You had four lanes between two people!

nellly · 26/08/2025 07:45

JifNtGif · 26/08/2025 07:21

Could you book lessons to improve technique if too slow ?

See this is why I’m not worried about AI taking my job 😂 I’m guessing this is a bot comment and it’s failed to understand… any of the post.

She wasn’t complaining about speed but about his apparent intrusion into her space. She was faster than him that’s why she caught him up.
But it is a comment about swimming I suppose so not the worst I’ve seen

Original poster
tamade · 26/08/2025 07:46

SisterMarie · 26/08/2025 07:38

Probably not as he moved....youre just assuming he thought that.

Show quote history

it's the moving back into lane 2 as soon as I got out though, I get not wanting to swim next to a wall or ladders but lane 3 is also open on both sides so why not continue there after I got out? my conclusion is that he lane 2 is his fave and he made a passive aggressive play for it right from the off.

I could be wrong but I like to work out how peoples minds work

OP posts:
SisterMarie · 26/08/2025 07:46

CliantheLang · 26/08/2025 07:39

He shouldn't have been in her lane, at all.

Show quote history

"Her lane"
😂

Its a public pool and he moved

Boing98 · 26/08/2025 07:48

Some people just love looking for drama when there isn't any

rwalker · 26/08/2025 07:48

Non event
I’d get out of lane 1 soon as possible as being next to side that’s where people get in.

no idea why you think he was trying to force you out of your lane
he just used your lane to get across to the next empty one

then after you got out he move to an EMPTY lane
I think you were over invested in him

PigeonPie · 26/08/2025 07:49

‘Why not lane 1?’

Any lane by a wall is usually really hard work and slower (hence why the best lanes in competition swimming are the middle).

I never choose a lane by the wall if there’s another free lane.

OP - it isn’t just men though - there’s one particular woman at my pool who seems to choose exactly where I’m swimming if she’s there at the same time as me - regardless of how many people are in the pool!