Sister went nuts over a cup of coffee

[CrashBambiCoot]

my sister visits my house around 3 times a week. Every time she comes she takes the piss out of my coffee calling it “half a cup of coffee” etc

She last visited Friday where I made her a coffee and she snapped “oh come on, fill it up for fucks sake” saying I’d only half filled the mug (I hadn’t).

This morning she turns up. I make coffee, as I was taking it into the living room she looks into the mugs and screams “half a cup of coffee”. I snap back “I don’t fill it to the top so it doesn’t get spilled! Nobody fills coffee right to the top” so she started dancing around me acting crazy shouting “ooo don’t spill it” etc before suddenly lunging at me and shouting in my face - coffee got spilt.

Now I’ve said I’m not making her coffee anymore. That’s it. Sick of the piss taking and ranting and raving. DH witnessed all this and basically joined in with her. She’s 42, DH is 50.

its not normal to fill coffee right to the top is it??? And the hysterics is certainly not normal is it?

A photo is required to judge.

She's not aggressive, she's lovely and fussy and anxious and eager to please and help - I think she was borderline panicking that we'd have tea that was akin to poison if it were allowed to taste of anything.

The fact that she does my head in with her fussing and seems to have no tastebuds (as far as we can tell) is absolutely my issue and nothing to do with her - she doesn't deserve to find out exactly how much of a dickhead I am.

I'm kind of jealous of her innocence - very few people have ever been unkind to her and when she's in her happy little bubble, I'd feel a complete shit to pop it on the basis of a crap cuppa.

wtf no its not

Of course it’s fine to decline a cup of coffee, but the sister isn’t doing that, she jumped up and danced around OP shouting, which caused the coffee to spill.

Stop trying to defend the indefensible. You are not owed a coffee as a guest, nobody is.

I always fill right to the top, and I usually spill it. It's one of the reasons I have hard flooring in my house. It's just how I do things, but I'd never judge someone else for not wanting coffee stains on their carpets.

God knows why this winds your sister up so much, but she is being a complete arsehole. I'd guess that this isn't actually about coffee, does she normally try to undermine or ridicule you? People who regularly do that sort of thing are insecure and need to bring others down to feel better about themselves.

Your husband joining in is a whole other level of fuckery.

They are both dicks, but a good big mug of coffee is the law

Of course it is. It shows you couldn't care less about someone else's preferences.

Generally, if you're the guest in someone's house, you accept what you're given even if it's not the way you really like it.

Different rules for close family and friends who are in and out of each other's houses all the time. Then you can be more honest.

Sounds like op is a chronic underfiller because she won't trust adults to drink from a full cup without spilling it. SIL seems to have repeatedly asked for a proper, full cup but is being ignored and treated like a child. As DH sided with SIL, that suggests that SIL has a point.

If OP's description of the SIL's behaviour is accurate and not exaggerated for effect and to gain sympathy then SIL was rude and out of order but I think that the unacceptable behaviour was a result of understandable frustration.

and to dance around and spill it is the way to go?

Why does she not drink it in the kitchen, then you don't have to carry it through?

She's dancing around and yelling and lunging at you over not filling her coffee cup to suit her? Lunging is a precursor to violence in my world.

Does she have mental health issues?

She's weird AF and so is your husband for joining in. Never make that bitch anything again. I wouldn't have her in the house, something's really wrong there. Husband, there's something deeply off there too.

I fill my mugs about 3/4" from the top.

Wtf is this whole thread? Some right weirdos. I mean I love coffee, but this is bonkers. Are you all drinking mugs full of instant coffee and therefore riled as you have to boil the kettle again? Surely with decent coffee from a cafetière or whatever in proper cups it’s irrelevant whether it’s 2/3rds full?

defend the indefensible

Dearie me 😂

This isn't the Nuremberg Trials, it's about someone repeatedly stating a coffee preference and repeatedly being ignored.

You are not owed a coffee as a guest, nobody is

Of course not, but if you are repeatedly offering the least you can do is listen to the preference of the person you are offering to. If OP preferred black coffee and OP's sis continually put milk in it every single time despite being constantly reminded, would the "STFU and drink it" thing still apply? No, it would not.

It absolutely is. Being a good host is about listening to your guests, not ignoring them.

@XDownwiththissortofthingX "To continually give someone an underfilled cup when they've repeatedly explained why they don't like that is just deliberately being disrespectful."

Oh come on, please, come on. "Deliberately disrespectful" - what about the sister's display of utter lunacy? Nobody in their right fucking minds dances around like a madwoman and screams in someone's face over a not quite full cup of coffee. Her behaviour was deranged.

Your sister sounds deranged, I’d be embarrassed for her. Whose DH was also being weird, hers or yours? If yours I’d be asking him if he feels unwell in himself. I’d not be making drinks for either of them ever again!

I don't get the not filling it to the top. I always do. But even then when I have anyone over I always bring cups and the coffe and let people pour for themselves because I find everyone likes their tea and coffee a specific way and I just provide everything you need to make your perfect brew to enjoy. I find doing it for others stressful

Aye, and if OP fills her cup properly for once then there will be no histrionics and everyone is happy.

I don't get the not filling it to the top. I always do. But even then when I have anyone over I always bring cups and the coffe and let people pour for themselves because I find everyone likes their tea and coffee a specific way and I just provide everything you need to make your perfect brew to enjoy. I find doing it for others stressful.

However can't she just have more coffee once she finishes her cup? Bit dramatic to be so ott over it

Yet another thread where the Op posts about a highly implausible scenario then disappears. Boring at this stage.

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Haha. My parents love a half filled cup. Cos they’re in their 70s and not always so stable in their feet. And I always jokingly ask what happened to the other half if they make it. I always fill it right to the top. Usually 1mm. Slurp the first cm before I leave the kitchen so I don’t spill. Then take the rest to where ever I’m going to drink it. If someone makes me a cup I’d expect to 0.5-1cm from the top for sure.

It sounds like OP’s sister is so desperate for a free cup of coffee that she is going around to OP’s three times a week. Plus shouting and jumping because she is missing 10ml of liquid in her cup of coffee. 🙄

No one is forcing the sister to go around.

Thankfully OP has had enough and won’t be having this ungrateful twat around anymore.

Her sister is 42 not a child, her behaviour is extremely odd regardless of how much coffee is or isn’t in the cup. Would you behave the same way?

I make it about 1cm below the rim. If I had a sister, and she didn't think the mug were filled enough, I'd say "pop.a drop more water in, but not too much otherwise it will spill".

If the sister than behaved in a bullying way and shouted in my face, she wouldn't come again. The DH shouldn't have joined in.

This thread makes me pleased to be an only child.