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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Probation extended, I’m worried

51 replies

Hendion · 12/08/2025 23:38

My partner has been told his 3 month probation is being extended to 4 months, because his manager has been off work for the past 3 weeks. He is 2 months into the job.

They said there are no performance concerns and they are happy with his work, they just want him to have finished his project by the end of probation.

Does this sound like an excuse? Is he at risk
of being fired? I’m worried sick.

OP posts:
andthat · 13/08/2025 00:36

Hendion · 13/08/2025 00:00

Thank you all? So you think he might be safe? He worked so hard to get this job and has given it his all, I’m so worried and upset for him.

Kindly @Hendion, you are catastrophising. There’s no need to be so worried/upset/so stressed you could be sick…he hasn’t been sacked! He’s been given a reason for the extension and told it’s not performance related. So chill!!

Hendion · 13/08/2025 00:38

Thank you! Sorry I just don’t know whether to believe the reason they’re giving. I worry it actually is performance and he’ll end up failing his probation

OP posts:
nam3c4ang3 · 13/08/2025 00:40

Honestly - you need to chill out. I get the nerves but it won’t help your partner and it’s making you over think for no real good reason. If they say it’s to accommodate the manager being away - then so be it, why would they lie? Has he been away? If yes, then no issue.

GloriaMonday · 13/08/2025 00:44

I've had a probation extended because my boss was on holiday and it turned out to be OK.

Hendion · 13/08/2025 07:24

GloriaMonday · 13/08/2025 00:44

I've had a probation extended because my boss was on holiday and it turned out to be OK.

Thank you. Were there performance concerns aswell, or was it actually just your boss being away?

OP posts:
StillweriseLH · 13/08/2025 07:30

Calm down! They documented the reason, they have confirmed it’s not performance. If you’re so adamant he works for a company which would lie so directly why do you want him to stay there?

processes such as these need evidence documentation. If they’ve written the reason as manager abscence, they aren’t fools- if it’s poor performance they need to write that to have a hope of fulfilling the need for evidence later on should they want it.

UsingAMansNameInAWomensWorld · 13/08/2025 08:33

I think the one thing that's sure is it's not performance based

squashyhat · 13/08/2025 08:35

Imveryold · 12/08/2025 23:52

Reads like an AI answer.

And yet you still decided to quote the whole thing.

AuntyDepressant · 13/08/2025 08:41

It does seem unfair to suddenly move the goal posts and I think I would be saying that to them because it's not what he agreed. The manager being off is a separate issue and nothing to do with your boyfriend.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 08:44

Peaceandlabradors · 12/08/2025 23:47

An extended probation period can be concerning, but it doesn't always mean you'll be fired. It could be a sign your employer wants more time to assess your suitability, or that they've identified areas for improvement. Focus on understanding the reasons for the extension and addressing any concerns to demonstrate your commitment and potential for success in the role.

Here's a more detailed breakdown:
Possible reasons for extension:
Insufficient time to assess performance:
Your employer might need more time to evaluate your work, especially if they've been busy or haven't had enough opportunity to observe you.

Areas for improvement:
They may have identified specific areas where you need to develop your skills or knowledge.

Organizational changes:
Changes in the company, like restructuring or new responsibilities, might necessitate a longer probation to ensure you're adequately trained and integrated.

Lack of clarity:
Your manager might not have been clear on their expectations, or you may have needed more guidance.

Company-specific factors:
Factors like financial position or workload adjustments can also influence the decision.

What to do:
Ask for clarification:
Don't hesitate to ask your manager or HR for specific feedback on why your probation was extended and what areas need improvement.

Focus on areas for improvement:
Once you understand the specific issues, create a plan to address them and demonstrate your commitment to learning and growth.

Be proactive:
Seek out opportunities to learn, ask questions, and take initiative to show your eagerness to succeed.

Stay professional:
Even if you're feeling discouraged, maintain a positive and professional attitude.

Consider your options:
If you feel the situation is untenable, you may want to explore other opportunities.

Document everything:
Keep records of performance reviews, feedback, and any communication related to your probation.

When to be more worried:
Lack of specific feedback:
If your employer provides vague reasons for the extension or can't articulate what you need to improve, it could be a red flag.

Unfair reasons:
If the extension is based on discriminatory factors like your age, gender, or ethnicity, it's a serious issue.

Unclear expectations:
If you're unsure of what's expected of you, it's crucial to get clarity and documentation.

In short, an extended probation period can be a chance to prove yourself, but it's important to understand the reasons behind it and address any concerns proactively.

Gosh. The promtitutes come out a lot earlier these days.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 08:45

Imveryold · 12/08/2025 23:52

Reads like an AI answer.

That’s because it is.

Unfortunately it’s failed to point out that probation is a red herring anyway, because you can be dismissed for no reason (bar discrimination) within the first 2 years with no come back anyway.

dogcatkitten · 13/08/2025 08:49

They may want to see how the project gets finished off before a final decision, sounds reasonable it's difficult to judge on part completed work. And if the boss has delayed that, by not being there to supervise that could well be a real factor.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 08:49

StillweriseLH · 13/08/2025 07:30

Calm down! They documented the reason, they have confirmed it’s not performance. If you’re so adamant he works for a company which would lie so directly why do you want him to stay there?

processes such as these need evidence documentation. If they’ve written the reason as manager abscence, they aren’t fools- if it’s poor performance they need to write that to have a hope of fulfilling the need for evidence later on should they want it.

Not with less than 2 years’ service they don’t!

MegaClutterSlut · 13/08/2025 08:59

The reason they have given could be a genuine one so calm down. You over reacting the way you have is probably making it worse for your partner and adding more stress on him

thepariscrimefiles · 13/08/2025 09:07

Hendion · 13/08/2025 00:00

Thank you all? So you think he might be safe? He worked so hard to get this job and has given it his all, I’m so worried and upset for him.

Is he in a union? If not, he should join one now. Does he have it in writing that the extension of his probation is not related to performance but because his manager was away for two weeks?

It sounds reasonable and it would be hard for them to justify letting him go at the end of the extended probabion period if they have specifically told him that there are no issues with his performance.

WelshBookWitch · 13/08/2025 09:16

I work in HR - if it is a decent company they should give clear reasons for the extension and put support measures in place to help, eg more regular check ins with a line manager.

Not all companies are decent though, so it is hard to say for definite.
There is not much you can do except accept their word that it is not due to performance.

I had my probation extended. I was in the middle of a divorce, moving out of my family home, now ExH was is prison for DV. I was definitely not performing as I should. Finally shared with my manager and I was given flexible working, more support and counseling. I passed the extended probation and it was fine.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 09:25

thepariscrimefiles · 13/08/2025 09:07

Is he in a union? If not, he should join one now. Does he have it in writing that the extension of his probation is not related to performance but because his manager was away for two weeks?

It sounds reasonable and it would be hard for them to justify letting him go at the end of the extended probabion period if they have specifically told him that there are no issues with his performance.

They wouldn’t need to justify it. If there was no discrimination, there’d be no case to answer.

Dangermoo · 13/08/2025 09:31

Hendion · 13/08/2025 00:06

My boyfriend is very stressed. He showed me the email work sent, and it didn’t list any issues at all. It just said they’re extending it because his manager has been away.

when he asked in person, the manager said there are no performance concerned. But I’m worried.

I don't think he's got anything to worry about, going by that conversation x

Limehawkmoth · 13/08/2025 09:34

Read his contract
if it defines probation period in a absolute number (I.e. it doesn’t say a “minimum of 3 months” ), I’d be taking this to HR and “reminding” them that legally his probation finishes at 3 months. No ifs and buts.

If there are no performance issue at 3 months, it is not his problem if mamanger was/is absent for some of that. Happens all the time. during bosses absence he is being supervised by someone- that is who should do review in boss’s absence. So those missingn3 weeks the feedback should be there from someone else.

also this reeks of it being only bosses decision . Surely boss is getting feedback on his new hire from multiple people before a decison is reached, along with a someone delivering objectives. Delivering objectives should be measurable that even your bf can measure, doesn’t make any difference that boss is absent.

this is frankly ridiculous- bosses will always be taking holiday. Going on paternity leave etc. they have someone standing in for them in a longer absence like 3 weeks. Company is very weird for allowing or suggesting probabtion is “paused” whilst boss absent . Bloody ridiculous and very unprofessional.

Limehawkmoth · 13/08/2025 09:35

Oh, and get him to join union. You too. Might not cover this if there is an issue, but working life throws up issues and you don’t know you need a union till you do and it’s too late.

CloudPop · 13/08/2025 09:40

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 08:45

That’s because it is.

Unfortunately it’s failed to point out that probation is a red herring anyway, because you can be dismissed for no reason (bar discrimination) within the first 2 years with no come back anyway.

Edited

Excellent point

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 13/08/2025 09:45

Limehawkmoth · 13/08/2025 09:34

Read his contract
if it defines probation period in a absolute number (I.e. it doesn’t say a “minimum of 3 months” ), I’d be taking this to HR and “reminding” them that legally his probation finishes at 3 months. No ifs and buts.

If there are no performance issue at 3 months, it is not his problem if mamanger was/is absent for some of that. Happens all the time. during bosses absence he is being supervised by someone- that is who should do review in boss’s absence. So those missingn3 weeks the feedback should be there from someone else.

also this reeks of it being only bosses decision . Surely boss is getting feedback on his new hire from multiple people before a decison is reached, along with a someone delivering objectives. Delivering objectives should be measurable that even your bf can measure, doesn’t make any difference that boss is absent.

this is frankly ridiculous- bosses will always be taking holiday. Going on paternity leave etc. they have someone standing in for them in a longer absence like 3 weeks. Company is very weird for allowing or suggesting probabtion is “paused” whilst boss absent . Bloody ridiculous and very unprofessional.

He has no rights in relation to dismissal, barring discrimination, for 2 years.

you really think shouting about legal rights (that he doesn’t have) 2 months into the job is a good idea?!

Peaceandlabradors · 13/08/2025 11:52

Imveryold · 12/08/2025 23:52

Reads like an AI answer.

It was! I put the question into google to see what it said - pretty good advice though 😀

iliketobereasonable · 13/08/2025 11:58

Is there any change in his benefits after the end of the probation? If so, I would be challenging the delay as it isn’t his fault his manager has been off the last 2 months and been unavailable to assess him.
In my current job, when I first started, my very busy manager overlooked doing the paperwork to complete my probation process. I got an automated message saying my probation was being extended and my benefits (health insurance, pension contributions) were also being delayed. I was furious! They sorted it out quickly. I’ve been there 5 years now. Sadly, lack of following process at this company is still an issue, but otherwise it’s a good place to work.

Cranberryavocado · 13/08/2025 12:53

From my experience, this doesn't sound great tbh. I would be atarting to look at a plan B but also it could all be fine. I feel like there is something up though, these sound like odd excuses.