To not be fazed by job interviews and to find it odd how much anxiety they cause for others?

[DearPeachBiscuit]

I’m not saying I enjoy them but I just don’t get nervous. I prepare, I show up, I speak clearly and that’s it. It’s not something I dread or overthink. But I’ve noticed a lot of people talk about interviews like they’re this massive ordeal and it’s made me wonder if I’m missing something, or if others are overhyping the stress.

AIBU to think interviews don’t have to be that big a deal?

Do you truly not understand why people are nervous about a situation that decides if they do or don’t get a job that they really want? I think it’s more odd not to be nervous unless you don’t care about the job obviously.

I do get nervous but I get excited more than anything. Its like the adrenaline gives me a huge rush and I love acting and performing ( did it as a degree) and I have adhd so I almost go into it playing a part 🤣 which helps with the nerves. I probably am ravaged with nerves underneath all the masking but I bury it with the excitement and high energy. I do sit at home for hours after though ruminating on it and overthinking and feeling like an idiot! So there’s that!

I’m also not bothered by them, but as I contract I probably do more interviews than most, and I know that I’m really good at my job. So it’s a good thing I don't worry about them

I was nervous earlier in my career as a lot was riding on the outcome. They were generally jobs i really wanted and needed as I was out of work and there was a lot of competition

Now, im not nervous. In my last round of interviews, I wasnt that fussed if I got the job or not. I had a job already, I just fancied a different job. There wasnt huge competition for the roles and i have more awareness that recruitment is hit and miss so its not a fail to not be recruited. I also have more experience of rubbish employers so I am more of the frame of mind that I am interviewing them. Which people always say, but is now real for me.

It can also come down to age and experience giving you more confidence.

When I was a final year student going for interviews for my first "proper" job then, yes, I would get nervous. I did the preparation work, learning about each company, thinking of questions I could ask, preparing my answers to all the standard sort of questions but I would still have butterflies beforehand. I always found it difficult to talk about my strengths and so on. Lack of self confidence I suppose.

I then stayed in my first job for 13 years and when I left it was to a company that was a buy out from the previous one so I was head hunted more or less, rather than having a formal interview.

When that finally came to an end 6 years later I was 40 and hadn't really had to interview for nearly 20 years. I was convinced I would be up against ambitious youngsters with more up to date skills. So, nervous again. But I pretty soon discovered that my skills and experience were relevant and that self promotion, i.e talking up my strengths was no longer a problem. In short, 20 more years of life experience gives you a lot more self confidence.

I changed job a few times in my last 20 years working and found interviews a breeze. But I do understand why people starting out can feel stressed by them.

I hate them. I have ADHD and autism and I know I come across as weird. So I try to mask as much as I can which takes so much effort that I lose my thoughts altogether. And I know I do this so I’m up to high doh before every interview.

I am rather surprised you lack empathy so much.

Some people are just very confident. Maybe it's because you didn't care enough. For me, i've been in the position where I was down to my last few pounds, I had no food or electricity and had bills coming up, so I've been desperate for the job, any job. I was very nervous then as I had no one to rely on.

It's when you think you really want something or in many cases need it and you know you can do whatever it is. Selling yourself is a big personal thing IMO. It's so much pressure.

The one time I couldn't have cared less I got the job (and it was a shit show).

I’m a seasoned interviewer and pretty confident when it comes to being interviewed myself, but I don’t get the point of this thread. Interviews are well known for being stressful and it’s entirely normal for someone to feel anxious about it. A lack of ‘stress’ does not mean you are superior. It really depends what you’ve got to lose and how much you are counting on getting the job; not everyone will know what that’s like, not to have a safety net.

I'm not fazed either, and I'm generally good at them, it's quite natural for me. Likewise, no problem whatsoever with public speaking.
On the other hand, I'm unable to think straight if I see a spider or a dragonfly.

Feels like a bit of a silly post?
great, you think they’re fine but some people don’t - surely it’s normal life for people to disagree about things

Of course you’re not unreasonable to not find interviews nerve wracking or pressurising.

You are, of course, massively unreasonable to not have the vaguest idea as to how others do find them nerve wracking.

Sometimes a lot is riding on the interview going well, and that is the real cause of the nerves.

Why are there so many people these days who find the idea that anything outside their own lived experience is just so impossible to imagine - thoughtless or just stupid is my best guess…

I hate job interviews because i'm autistic.

Whether an interview is stressful or not and the degree to which it is/is not would, I guess, depend on how badly (or not) you want the job

When I was younger, the lead interviewer thought it was appropriate to ask me questions about my Sexual Assault.

Yep. I get anxious

What are your interviews like? My interviews can involve multiple stages, with presentations. Are you senior?

Full disclosure- I’m a retired HR lecturer with experience of teaching managers how to interview and coaching interviewees. So, I never got nervous but there are so many helpful techniques to help overcome nerves.

1. It’s a ‘conversation with a purpose’ not an interrogation’
2. Panels aren’t interested in what you can’t do, you can learn that. You may be not be able to do it YET
3. So many people are shy of ‘blowing their own trumpet’ but nobody can speak for your achievements better than you.
4. Be yourself. After a long day of interviews, you want to br the one that people remember positively.

People are different
HTH

YABU. Not everyone is good at them or feels confident. The more you do, the easier it gets though, certainly.

I don’t get nervous for interviews at all, but that’s because I’m going for the job because I want it, not because I’ve needed it. I always had savings to cover me for quite a few months or in a job at the time, so no pressure.

However, I get nervous about waking to the shops sometimes…..so horses for courses and all that.

Yes because the interview process in my company, like many others had changed and it’s now apparently “values based” instead of competency-based.

In practice this that they seem to ask you questions that have nothing to do with the actual job. As an autistic person this causes me a massive amount of stress and it means I have no idea how to prepare.

I KNOW I am competent and I have a track-record that speaks for itself; I always get great feedback about my work. But in interviews I’m asked questions and have no idea what the right answer is.

Last time I had an interview we were given a document to “help us prepare” which came in the form of a list of questions. I sat up until late going through the questions but they ended up having nothing to do with the interview which totally threw me.

I’m told I’m great at my job but these scenarios are hugely stressful and disadvantageous to neurodivergent people who just want to be able to give a straight answer to a straight question.

I mostly found them ok too OP, but I can understand why others find them stressful, especially when there's loads of competition. ✌️

Do you ever get the job though? 😂

Good for you.

It's like anything. It's nerve-wracking for some and not for others.

I have no fears about driving. I enjoy it, a 3-4 hour journey where I can listen to podcasts on all varieties of roads is something I positively look forward to. Doesn't stop me understanding that for some people that would be really scary, that some people find motorways overwhelming etc.