Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To Air Tag my son?

163 replies

Cluborange666 · 09/08/2025 13:52

Son is 15. We live in Manchester which does have a rough element, also the bomb is still at the back of my mind. DS has just got his first girlfriend from the other side of Manchester and they meet in the middle.
I bought a box of AirTags as my elder son (who is AuDHD) will be travelling to university every day with his brand new and expensive laptop (and he has massive form for forgetting bags).
I had the idea of making my younger child carry an AirTag in his pocket whilst in Manchester as a safety precaution. He says no and my husband supports this. I feel like it’s a good idea. Not because I will spy on him but in case he runs out of money or loses his phone and can’t get home. I’ll put it to the jury.

OP posts:
bigageap · 09/08/2025 15:34

Robin67 · 09/08/2025 14:43

Love this. When my kids have phones, that is what I will say/ do

Show quote history

It was mandatory from his first phone! No stress or arguments and he now says it’s super handy if I’m picking him up late from a friends to see how close I am and he meets me outside

ChristmasFluff · 09/08/2025 15:46

This is one of those situations where it can seem that having an element of knowledge and control will ease your anxiety, but actually the reverse is true.

It's healthy for him to gradually be increasing independence - and for you gradually be increasing your trust that he can deal with the world himself.

I echo those who are saying he needs to learn your phone number off by heart. that will be far more useful in the long run.

VickyEadieofThigh · 09/08/2025 16:53

FoxRedPuppy · 09/08/2025 15:16

We all managed without being tracked and tagged! And I grew up in the midst of IRA bombings and attacks. A friend of mine was in Manchester the day of the IRA bomb and she wasn’t wearing shoes. Because she was going through a hippy phase! A police officer carried her over the broken glass and rolled his eyes at her 😂

I remember being places with no money and having to work it out. It builds resilience and problem solving.

I was at university at Lancaster back in the late 70s and one Saturday, my boyfriend and I hitched to Manchester to go and see United. We took very little money (we were 18 and clearly, very stupid) and couldn't get a lift back at all. We ended up persuading a coach driver at the bus station to take us all the way for free (I had to cry to achieve this), promising to go down and pay the fare on the Monday morning. I made my boyfriend go as I believed it was all his fault.

ClassicalQueen · 09/08/2025 16:55

Find my friends or life360. An AirTag becomes a bit of an intrusion, it’s for items not people.

VickyEadieofThigh · 09/08/2025 16:58

JellyBeanSpring25 · 09/08/2025 15:33

No, because having an AirTag won’t provide him with money or a phone if he’s lost either.
I am curious as to your reasons for him having one upon his person.

Scene: the OP'S house. She us peering anxiously at her phone.
OP: Our Nimrod hasn't moved for 4 hours and he's not answering his phone. He seems to be in the middle of Deansgate. I'm off to pick him up.

OP gets to Deansgate. No sign of Nimrod.

Scene: OP'S house. Nimrod walks through the door.

Nimrod: Where's Mum? Just seen she was calling me but I had my phone switched off. I lost that air tag, no idea where...

BeefBoogyOn · 09/08/2025 16:59

My DC is a bit young currently, but I work with kids and DH works with criminals/young offenders, our DC will be tracked as soon as he's old enough to be out and about independently. Life 360, air tag, Iwatch, whatever. We're Salford/Manchester too, it's dangerous.

VickyEadieofThigh · 09/08/2025 16:59

HollyGolightly4 · 09/08/2025 14:21

Buses in Manchester take cash 🤷🏻‍♀️. It's literally £2. Make sure he's got £4 tucked away for emergencies.

I think it's fair your son tells you where he's going (ie. City centre/ her area) but I think an air tag is a step too far.

Remind him of general safety and responsibility for phones. Surely his girlfriend has a phone? You could tell him to save your number in her phone just in case (or he could learn it, but none of us do that these days 😂)

Just checked and yes, they do.

CurlewKate · 09/08/2025 17:14

BeefBoogyOn · 09/08/2025 16:59

My DC is a bit young currently, but I work with kids and DH works with criminals/young offenders, our DC will be tracked as soon as he's old enough to be out and about independently. Life 360, air tag, Iwatch, whatever. We're Salford/Manchester too, it's dangerous.

Why? What benefit will it bring to whom?

PinkChaires · 09/08/2025 17:42

Cluborange666 · 09/08/2025 14:09

The buses only take cards/phones. Not sure what cash would achieve? It’d be £30 for a taxi. Are there still any pay phones?

In manchester? I dont think so- i paid with cash myself at piccadilly the other day?

BeefBoogyOn · 09/08/2025 18:00

CurlewKate · 09/08/2025 17:14

Why? What benefit will it bring to whom?

Show quote history

We'll know where he/his phone/the bag that he's forgotten he had is and can retrieve if necessary.

CurlewKate · 09/08/2025 18:21

BeefBoogyOn · 09/08/2025 18:00

We'll know where he/his phone/the bag that he's forgotten he had is and can retrieve if necessary.

Show quote history

Well, you won’t know where his bag is unless he’s carrying it. And you won’t know where he is if he doesn’t have his phone on him. And if he’s got his phone on him you can call him……

BetweenTwoFerns · 09/08/2025 18:24

Cluborange666 · 09/08/2025 14:09

The buses only take cards/phones. Not sure what cash would achieve? It’d be £30 for a taxi. Are there still any pay phones?

Someone said give him £20 for emergencies but you say it’s £30 for a taxi. So give him £30!Confused

My girls used to put £20 in their shoe when they went out for lost phone emergencies.

Nothankyov · 09/08/2025 18:26

I think this is highly dependent on circumstances. If he has said no and he is 15 then you shouldn’t do it. You can of course talk to him to see if you can change his mind but if not then no. I have tagged my kids before. But I do it on holidays when abroad not day to day.

VickyEadieofThigh · 09/08/2025 18:29

BeefBoogyOn · 09/08/2025 18:00

We'll know where he/his phone/the bag that he's forgotten he had is and can retrieve if necessary.

Show quote history

But you said it was "dangerous" as your reason - forgetting his stuff doesn't equate.

SaratogaFilly · 09/08/2025 18:30

bigageap · 09/08/2025 13:55

Use life 360. My 15 year old know if he wants us to pay his phone bill then his phone has that app!

This is us too - it’s a condition of paying for their phone bill, so no tagging necessary!

InsertUsernameHere · 09/08/2025 18:38

My DC have AirTags on their key rings - so they can find their keys. They are linked to their phones - not mine. AirTags also chirp if they are moved by someone who isn’t the owner (such as if I borrow my DCs key - it warns me there is an AirTag following me). We use find my phone - they can see me when I’m picking them up, and I can see how their journey home is going. However, they aren’t greatly reassuring as they are quite often inaccurate and reliant on wifi/mobile signal. In your instance - him learning your phone number and you having his GFs number seems more helpful. AirTags/findmy phone are no replacement for making arrangements/agreements.

CurlewKate · 09/08/2025 18:56

@bigageapand @SaratogaFillywhat benefit do you or anyone else get from tracking your teenagers?

Lemonadeat8 · 09/08/2025 18:56

Life360 app.

jolies1 · 09/08/2025 19:27

Make sure he takes 2 x payment methods with him.

Set up Uber so you can book a pick up on his behalf back to your home.

Make sure someone else has your number eg his GF, in case he loses his phone.

Ask him for an idea of where he is / what his plans are and ask he updates you if they change.

Set a reasonable curfew with the understanding that he must contact you if he is stuck and struggling to get home.

Make sure he knows you will always get him if he is in difficulties without judgement - if he calls and says “mum, I need you to come and get me,” you will be there / sort a taxi to get him home.

All reasonable. Air tagging him is not.

Cynic17 · 09/08/2025 19:38

It's an awful thing to do. Manchester isn't the wild West but, even if it was, there is no need. Your son is old enough to look after himself and doesn't need to have his mummy tracking his every move.

HonoriaBulstrode · 09/08/2025 19:39

Use life 360. My 15 year old know if he wants us to pay his phone bill then his phone has that app!

He'll tell you he's going round to Steve's house. His phone will be at Steve's house. Doesn't mean that he is also at Steve's house.

It's just a variation on 'friend as alibi' which is as old as the hills.

CosyMintFish · 09/08/2025 19:46

OP you need to allow your child some freedom to make mistakes and solve problems. Too many teens are sheltered from real-world problem solving and free to get into all sorts of trouble online. When you were 15 think about the freedom you had, and the confidence you gained as a result.

i remember my 16yo having to figure out a new train route for himself to get himself for a 150 mile trip: I was worried but he was just fine. The nerves when he went to an 18th birthday party in London and stayed overnight, international travel by himself. But all of those things are within the grasp of a teenager who’s trusted to take some decisions for themselves.

Funnywonder · 09/08/2025 19:58

The first couple of times my eldest went into Belfast City Centre on his own, at about 14, he agreed to let me track him temporarily on WhatsApp. I told him where to stay away from as there are some pretty dodgy areas. Once he gained some confidence and was a bit more savvy about where to avoid, he agreed to text me when he arrived and when he was leaving, so no more tracking. He’s 17 now and still lets me know when he’s on the bus home, particularly if he’s in town after the shops close. People are saying we all survived without being tracked, but why on earth wouldn’t you make use of a modern resource? There were no mobile phones when I was a teenager, but I’m not about to take my son’s phone off him just to replicate the good old days. I was caught up in many a bomb scare and the occasional explosion and am glad my son doesn’t have that to contend with. My mum must have been worried sick.

luckylavender · 09/08/2025 19:58

ninjahamster · 09/08/2025 13:53

I don’t think you can tag him against his will. The culture of knowing where everyone is all the time is getting a bit bonkers I think.

This

RedRiverShore5 · 09/08/2025 20:01

If he hasn't got an iPhone it will beep every so often and may show up on a friends iPhone as a lost AirTag, or something like that. DH has one but no iPhone so I can look how he is getting on in his running and long distance events and it beeps after about 12 hours or so of being away from my phone.