To Air Tag my son?

[Cluborange666]

Son is 15. We live in Manchester which does have a rough element, also the bomb is still at the back of my mind. DS has just got his first girlfriend from the other side of Manchester and they meet in the middle.
I bought a box of AirTags as my elder son (who is AuDHD) will be travelling to university every day with his brand new and expensive laptop (and he has massive form for forgetting bags).
I had the idea of making my younger child carry an AirTag in his pocket whilst in Manchester as a safety precaution. He says no and my husband supports this. I feel like it’s a good idea. Not because I will spy on him but in case he runs out of money or loses his phone and can’t get home. I’ll put it to the jury.

Your son and DH have said no. So that’s your answer. Your views don’t trump theirs.

So he'll learn to carry cash when he's going far from home 🤷‍♂️

You can't pre-empt every single scrape he might get into and 'fix' it before it happens.

This is how useless men are formed.

They're used to everyone doing everything for them and never learning responsibility.

Good point about phone boxes, haven't seen any for years! The ones I have seen I can remember being repurposed with defibrillators in them or some such

Ask him to give his GF your phone number in case he loses his phone or it runs out of charge? Bee network buses do take cash btw.

Think about how we coped back in the day.

Does he know your mobile number off by heart? If he lost his phone then he’d be able to borrow someone else’s phone to call you. If you work in a place with no phone access or whatever then you need to make him learn a second number.

If he loses his phone then how would he get back? You mention being in Manchester so I assume you would physically go to his location or send an Uber and pay from your phone.

An AirTag shows the location of the AirTag not of your son who might take off his coat and leave it somewhere or if he unzips the pocket it’s in on a cold day to take his gloves out, it could fall out. If he was going to tag himself then his shoes might be better as he’s less likely to take them off. I would say that a smart watch is less obvious.

Personally I didn’t location monitor my kids because they didn’t like it and I said that I wouldn’t on the proviso that if I call, they contact me as soon as possible. They abided by that rule so we were all happy. I understand why your son doesn’t want to be tracked and I think that you should respect his wishes. They give a false sense of security and a lack of belief that ds2 can deal with being out and about. Better to have an emergency fiver in a small wallet in his coat plus your mobile number just in case.

How do you think it will help?

He’s said no, so he doesn’t consent to you tracking him. I wouldn’t either.
Kindly, I think you need to manage your anxiety differently and let him have the freedom to take risks so he learns how to manage them. You’ll always worry, which is natural, but you need to let him have his independence or he’ll end up resenting you and so will your DH.

Remember that “mistakes” are often learning experiences and that it’s not the end of the world if he ends up in situations like accidentally spending the money he needs for the bus home. This is the perfect age to make mistakes like that because he has you as a backup plus you live in the same city so can help in person too. He could be across the country at uni in 3 years time when you can’t pick him up if he’s stranded.

I know it’s nerve wracking but it’s important to learn all that.

@Snorlaxo ·
Think about how we coped back in the day.
Does he know your mobile number off by heart

I was actually wondering about this the other day, how we all used to remember each others phone numbers as we had to physically input them into phones.
Nowadays we just press a button and it does it for us.
Would my teens know my number if they lost their phones? Or any family ones?! I'll have to ask them and if not, get them to memorize it!

My DD has this too, imo better safe than sorry

Love this. When my kids have phones, that is what I will say/ do

Dh had has the same mobile number for 8 years now, and I couldn’t tell you what it is for all the money in the world.

But I can still remember phone numbers of my friends in primary school.

My kids are a lot younger so I don’t have personal experience (although I do air tag my non-verbal ASD DS age 6).

I don’t think it’s an unreasonable request or unreasonable to worry and to want to have a way to check in if your son is, for example, out later than expected. But without your DH support and DS consent it’s not possible.

I like the idea that another person had about making a tracking app a condition of paying for the phone/ phone bill for peace of mind, but I don’t think this can be enforced after they’ve had the phone first without it— saving this for future!

I completely get your concerns but I think your boy has to learn how to cope and be independent too. Obviously talk to him and ask him if x and y happened would you know what to do if you got into trouble. That will instill far more trust between you rather than hiding an airtag. I get it though you'd do anything to protect him but him actually knowing he can ring you, or tell you things are wrong is the most valuable asset. If you lose his trust, that's when it'll be very hard

There is a payphone in Manchester, it's just near the Museum of Science and Industry. However I don't know anyone's mobile number including my own

That made me laugh. I'm the same. I know my mam and dad's number from childhood but haven't a clue about my husband's 🤣🤣

I genuinely don’t understand why people think tracking their teenagers is a good idea and in what circumstances they think it will help. Obviously, it will reassure a parent to know where their child is-but apart from that….

No. My 12 year old takes a 20 min train and then a bus to school, and has airtags in his school bag and his PE bag. but they are for the bags, not for him!
Very handy to get a bag back that he accidentally left in the train though.

We all managed without being tracked and tagged! And I grew up in the midst of IRA bombings and attacks. A friend of mine was in Manchester the day of the IRA bomb and she wasn’t wearing shoes. Because she was going through a hippy phase! A police officer carried her over the broken glass and rolled his eyes at her 😂

I remember being places with no money and having to work it out. It builds resilience and problem solving.

Yes, and 081 811 81 81 😁
I mean what the fuck does my brain still need to remember that for 🤣

No please don’t, part of parenting is trusting them and letting them go. Set age appropriate boundaries and expectations, then let him go

My childhood phone number was Bampton 374. And it was a manual exchange handled by Mrs Gullidge in the post office. I did not grow up in Greendale…..

Oh that’s helpful. Thanks.

Manchester? The Bee Network, i.e. all the buses, take cash. Single fare is £2.
https://tfgm.com/tickets-and-passes/ways-to-pay/cash-and-card

No, because having an AirTag won’t provide him with money or a phone if he’s lost either.
I am curious as to your reasons for him having one upon his person.