AIBU?? I have a 16 year old daughter who is an absolute delight! She is the loveliest girl, everyone comments on how lovely she is and she’s always with me. My DD gets involved in my work projects, church projects and is usually with me wherever I go.
I have never had a problem with her being with me all the time, she’s great company, very funny, can engage well with adults etc
HOWEVER… over the past 6 months or so she has become, on occasion, a bit disrespectful. She, I think, sees herself as my friend and therefore can sometimes speak to me as such; calling me by my first name, telling me I’m over the top, that I’m being too much, tonight she’s accused me “of shouting at her in front of everyone” I honestly don’t think that is true so when j asked her what she meant she said “oh I don’t remember but you always shout”. Honestly, I don’t think I do, and particularly not at her. It really upset me that she accused me of that, but also this is the second time now she’s said something like this. Tonight, I did not want to go to the social club that we are members of, I took the kids (on my own) away last week, I’ve had a busy week at work this week and none of the usual crowd were going to the club - my DD really wanted to go because she has friends there. I told her I would pop in just so she could see her friends but I didn’t want to stay- when we got there everyone was eating (they have special meal nights at the club). I said to her that it was awkward to wait whilst everyone else was eating and it was already getting late, it might be better for us to just leave. She immediately went for me saying “OK hunny bun we’ll just do what you want then” “it’s always about you” etc etc and I got really upset with her saying that it was never about me it was always about her- that is apparently when I “shouted at her in front of everyone”.
We are supposed to be going on a lovely treat weekend tomorrow just me and her, it’s a very expensive once in a lifetime thing, but when her DH said to her can you please be respectful tonight as you are going away tomorrow she basically just shrugged and said “Oh well, Mum will make out everything’s fine anyway”! Ugh! Really hurt right now!
Any advice? Or pearls of wisdom? Or should I just ride this nonsense out?
Have two boys who would never speak to me the way she does so may well be just Mum’s and daughters but would be good to hear other people’s views- first time posting in all these years of parenting so please be kind!