AIBU to send DC to private school funded by the LA

[missrachelsavesmedaily]

I was taken back by best friends response to my DC getting a new school setting come September.
we have been friends since we were children and tend to discuss a lot of things that I would not discuss with ofhers.
we struggled to find a school setting for DC come September when they start secondary school.
I have 3 children and we are financially comfortable I could pay the fee for private school for 1 but not 3 without it effecting our lives too much although 100 percent would not be able to do the same for the others.

DC starts a private school that was named on EHCP in September and we are extremely lucky to have been granted the school without tribunals.
we have accepted the place and the LA accepted the cost - I didn’t really think anything of it to be honest there was no other choices of schools such they are entitled to an education funded.
she got quite opinionated about the fees being covered !
should I be offering to pay towards the fees ?

@fizzwhizz1 both SALT and OT can be included in EHCPs. Although you may have to appeal to get provision detailed, specified and quantified in F.

This.

Do I blame or judge the OP for taking the space. No.

Am I troubled that a small minority get a huge, disproportionate amount spent on their schooling whilst every school I see is struggling. Yes.

I get you but if the state are not providing appropriate environments what choice do the parents have especially as they are normally cheaper than specialist. What does trouble me greatly are some specialist independents charging LA’s up to £100,000 a year plus transport. Even more troubling is that every kid I know who has gone to one has had s failed placement.

My cousin works in a private school in a rural location. They have a lot of LA funded spots because it is cheaper for them to go there than be bused to a state school. I don’t know the specifics, but apparently it’s a lot of these children cope and perform well and they could cope in mainstream.

at op, are you rural? I think you shouldn’t feel guilty about applying through the system and being awarded the option they feel is most appropriate. You don’t make the rules.

Nobody wants children with SEN in mainstream school, s either
There are loads of threads with posters complaining about children with SEN disrupting classes and you get all that their needs don't Trump other children's needs
So where do you want these children to go?🤔

I think people dont actually understand how much supporting a child at mainstream can cost compared to private. They assume private is more and its not always the case.

They also dont understand why private might work and mainstream with support might not work. It could be layouts of facilities and classrooms, access to a pool for physio exercises, the way timetable are structured with more time in the day for movement around the building. Etc

They also dont understand that special schools have a type of speciality and your child might not fit that mold either. The availability is poor and varies area to area.

I think people dont actually understand how much supporting a child at mainstream can cost compared to private. They assume private is more and its not always the case.

Absolutely yes. It was going to cost our LA substantially more to put DS1 in the local comprehensive than it did to place him at at a specialist independent. None of the LA special schools could remotely meet need (and neither could the comp, though they tried their best to place him there).

I agree.

Those who resent funding EHCPs also fail to realise DC who do not have their needs met as children and young people will cost the state more in adult life.

I think those that resent the spending think it's not worth it, and that their DC could achieve amazing things if it was spent on them instead. Particularly with DC like my DS3 who they'd view as naughty; they'd not want him in mainstream but probably want some kind of punishment provision, locked in a room writing out lines.

Even if they wanted the DC they perceive as naughty locked in room, that group of CYP will become adults. Without support now, many of them will need a greater amount of support throughout adult life.

A significant proportion of them would end up in residential placements or in contact with the justice system. Both of which would cost significant amounts of money. That figure could be greatly reduced by providing appropriate support as CYP.

Even for those who don’t need residential placements and don’t end up in the justice system but aren’t independent, support as a child and young person can be the difference between 2:1 support in the community and 1:1 support as an adult. Or the difference between 24/7 support and support for only part of the time. For some, it can be the difference between working and not working.

It is short-sighted of those who resent funding SEN provision when they fail to consider the long-term implications.

Oh I agree with you, just my RL experience about the cost has never been concerns on the government spending, but what is perceived as unfairness to their own kids.

When a person receives money from the government for any reason, tax payers feel uneasy as they benefit the least from the government money pot, while paying the most.
I don't know how you didn't know there would be animosity.
I'm sure you'd feel a little miffed, if it was a friend in this position.
I'd have kept the news to myself.

@PennywisePoundFoolish they wouldn’t swap, though, would they?

I have heard both arguments. Some people really resent the cost of DS1&3's EOTAS/EOTIS packages. I have been told many times it is far too much for the LA/government to spend.

When a person receives money from the government for any reason, tax payers feel uneasy

Do you ‘feel uneasy’ about all those DC, with SEN or not, going to state schools? Or is it just disabled DC who can’t be educated in mainstream state schools you ‘feel uneasy’ about?

My dc went to an expensive private residential special school funded through his EHCP. It cost over £100k a year including all the travel expenses. I didn't share the cost or the fact it was funded with anyone outside of SEN circles as I know people can be rude about it. But I also felt no guilt in taking the place as it was a legal requirement for the LA to meet my dcs needs, and no other school could meet his needs. Every child has a right to an education, and if the only suitable education is a private school, then that is what has to be funded. I viewed other children whose needs could be met in mainstream or a local special school as being lucky not to have such severe needs as my ds.

In your position I don't think it's unreasonable to take the place and for the LA to fully fund it, but I wouldn't share any information about the funding or any DLA and discounts you get. People will refuse to understand and it's not worth getting into discussions about it.

And your friend is sore because your kid got 'free' private schooling??

I don't think my friendship with this person would recover from that. Maybe she'd like her kid to experience all the difficulties yours does in return for a private education?

I feel unueasy a out a lot of things relating to my tax. Mainly wastage or vanity projects, and increasing amounts of for-profit companies delivering public services. There is an issue with that in the SEN sector and social care with private companies and there are calls for profits to be capped at 8%. Witherspack got 28% post tax profits.

But a lot of private schools are charities so noone is making a profit.

And the problem isn't the child recieving it.

Of course not @flawlessflipper. Ironically one of them was actually shafting social housing, with an undeclared property abroad(!)

I'm still waiting to hear from the LA about DS3's provision for September. So much about school attendance and fines if DC don't attend school on the 1st day back in September. But it's fine for DS3 to have nothing in place 😑

are you just selectively reading what I’ve put? What’s your point.

@x2boys is saying people don’t want these DC in MS, yet they also resent/are troubled/feel uneasy about money being spent on an appropriate education for these DC. People can’t have it both ways. If they don’t want them in MS and don’t want money spent on them, where do they want DC to go?

@PennywisePoundFoolish it is the same with things like blue badges and motability vehicles. No-one ever wants everything that goes with a disability.

She's jealous. Bit cheeky of you when you say you can afford the fees. She's a taker

All DC are entitled to an appropriate education made for them via the LA regardless of their parents’ financial situation. That isn’t cheeky, it is the law.

Do you think state school places should be means-tested?

Improving the quality of life for kids with disabilities and their families is something I want my taxes to be spent on! Ignore this ‘friend’ - hope your son thrives good luck to him. I am so pleased he will get the support he needs.

No you shouldn’t pay. Your child has the place at the school fair and square according to the current rules. You wouldn’t offer to pay extra Council Tax because you could afford to.