To be furious that my neighbour ‘borrowed’ my garden furniture for her BBQ?

[2coolec]

Went away for the weekend, came back Monday afternoon to find our patio table, four chairs, and parasol in next door’s garden.

Turns out she’d had a BBQ on Sunday and “thought we wouldn’t mind” if she borrowed them. Was “going to return it”. Only I found out because by Monday evening it was still all sat there and I saw her teenage son and his mates hanging out on my furniture.

No note. No text. Just helped herself. I wouldn’t even have known if I hadn’t looked over the fence.

I’m honestly livid. It’s not a small thing to borrow and she didn’t even ask. What if it had got damaged? Or gone missing?

AIBU to think this is beyond cheeky and actually borderline theft?

@Mayanatalia

Okay - and the rest would not be?

No because they’re inside the house, it’s not a big deal if they’re garden items.

Leaving aside the revelation that you keep your barbecue indoors - ours wouldn't go through the kitchen door....

So, the criterion for you is that anything outside the walls of the house is fair game for borrowing without permission, yes?

I think that that translates as 'my position is about to become untenable - I'm off'.

Okay 😂

Why?

This is brazen and I would be v surprised but equally surprised at the strength of feeling here. I think I'd be more amused than anything, but I do get on with my neighbours.

I get on fine with my neighbours so wouldn’t have an issue with it.

It wouldn’t bother me if I knew them. If I don’t know them it would be cheeky but it wouldn’t be a hill I’d die on worrying about.

This is mental 😂 people are nuts. It’s completely taking the piss. I know no harm has been done but it’s unbelievable, especially as they didn't bring it straight back after the BBQ. I wouldnt flip out at them as you have to live next door but id say, please can you bring my furniture back and ask before taking my things in future, i think that is fair enough.

Discourteous of them. Cheeky definitely but not theft if they never tended to keep it
don’t overreact

Hopefully, not under their patio while they use her garden furniture for another BBQ!

The OP has not been back since her first post?

@2coolec are you coming back? Waste of time thread.

Does she have a key? How did she get it just pass it over the fence?
The 'I didn't think you'd mind' is code for I thought I'd get away with poncing off you.

It's theft!

We have a fantastic relationship with all our immediate neighbours (both sides s d all houses opposite) so honestly wouldn’t bother me (though I’d expect t they’d message to say). Depends on your relationship with them I think

It is time for a nice, firm boundary. Clear communication that this is not ok.

The fact I’d not even been asked is what would make me furious.
The way you wrote the post suggests that she actually does have a way to contact you and do just that.
I would have said, “I dont mind you borrowing the furniture, but I do expect to be asked and I would have also said put it back in my garden after the BBQ is finished”
You can’t just go round helping yourself to peoples stuff and taking liberties.

She ought to have contacted you - Facebook, pone, whatever. It was cheeky of her. Tell her, Yes, I do mind... you could have contacted me, etc etc... and see what happens.

This is just astonishingly bad behaviour. If my neighbour did this to me my response would be disproportionately bad, like maybe burning their house down.
The level of people’s entitlement and lack of manners these days is just breathtaking. I’m glad I live next to lovely people.

Absolutely not the point. Just shows a complete lack of respect for others.

What??? Why are you having to spend time locking up your stuff so the neighbour doesn’t take it?? It’s theft, plain and simple. God people will be suggesting you pop the bird house and bath in the hallway next 🤣🤣🤣

I would be absolutely feckin furious , it would get padlocked up next time and they would seriously know how peed off I was over it , who actually does something like this I would never dream of just using something that didn’t belong to me and then still having it in their garden when you return shows how arrogant and ignorant they actually are

Disgusting cheek, it is theft isn’t it!?

No way! I cannot believe she had the cheek to do this! Actually speechless. Absolutely not on. Who comes and helps themselves to your garden furniture while you’re away. She didn’t leave a note bcus she knows it’s wrong. People have NO manners nowdays. I’d of said to her lucky you didn’t report it stolen and burgled to police as you weren’t to know what had happened. Get your furniture back and then have nothing more to do with her. People like this don’t change, she’s just one of those scummers