To be furious that my neighbour ‘borrowed’ my garden furniture for her BBQ?

[2coolec]

Went away for the weekend, came back Monday afternoon to find our patio table, four chairs, and parasol in next door’s garden.

Turns out she’d had a BBQ on Sunday and “thought we wouldn’t mind” if she borrowed them. Was “going to return it”. Only I found out because by Monday evening it was still all sat there and I saw her teenage son and his mates hanging out on my furniture.

No note. No text. Just helped herself. I wouldn’t even have known if I hadn’t looked over the fence.

I’m honestly livid. It’s not a small thing to borrow and she didn’t even ask. What if it had got damaged? Or gone missing?

AIBU to think this is beyond cheeky and actually borderline theft?

Send her a bill for the rental . I would fkn sue her

I cannot believe that they would do that. We get on REALLY well with our neigbhours but there is no way, they or we would 'borrow' garden furniture without checking it out first. It's beyond cheeky!

What can you do about it?? well it all depends on how you get on with your neighbours. But whatever your friendship entails it is still pushing the boundaries. In the first instance talk to them and tell them you're not happy with them borrowing the equipment without even an email/message requesting it was ok. If they are someone you don't associate with then a firm but polite message would definately be in order

I cannot believe that they would do that. We get on REALLY well with our neigbhours but there is no way, they or we would 'borrow' garden furniture without checking it out first. It's beyond cheeky!

What can you do about it?? well it all depends on how you get on with your neighbours. But whatever your friendship entails it is still pushing the boundaries. In the first instance talk to them and tell them you're not happy with them borrowing the equipment without even an email/message requesting it was ok. If they are someone you don't associate with then a firm but polite message would definately be in order

Has she got your phone number? Did she know she was having the barbecue before you went away?

I think it depends on the neighbours, your relationship with them, how easy it is to access your garden and the type of garden furniture. But, yes they are cfers.

Thats awful! So presumptuous! Imagine if I popped into Sainsbury and “borrowed” some home wares with a promise to return on Monday would that be ok??

I wonder why OP hasn’t answered any comments yet? Is she next door?

No you are completely right She is beyond cheeky and taking the Micky out of you

Yeah that’s disgusting behaviour. It’s really appalling people think they can just help themselves like that.

If you're not the kind of neighbours who have an understanding that it's ok to borrow each others stuff without asking (and I'm guessing not) then no you're not being unreasonable. It would cause me a lot of stress wondering how to deal with it. Do you risk falling out by telling them how you feel? You'd think they'd return it and keep the kids off at the very least.

It's theft, end of. I would be incandescent and depending on the neighbor would possibly call the cops.

This, and I would be putting up security cameras. God knows what these tea leaves get up to when you are not around.

I have a neighbour we would be close to and can imagine her borrowing them if ahe couldn't get me knowing I probably wouldn't mind, but I'd have had 10 missed calls and messages before she was forced into a decision of guessing whether or not I would mind.
They would also have been put back and there'd be a bottle of wine on my doorstep if I didn't mind.

I would do this but as a joke because at the end of the day you have to live next to them, but you can’t just let it slide because give an inch they take a mile clearly!

dear x x x please find attached invoice for use of garden furniture. Then list 1 x bottle of wine, 1 x bunch of flowers 1 x apology with promise this won’t happen again

the write

PS: in all serious though, please do not trespass on my property and steal my belongings as this is theft and we have been advised to report this to the police, which I’d hate to have to do. Just so we are clear, if there is anything you would like to borrow in future, please ask first to avoid any misunderstandings.

I was brought up that if you kicked your ball into a neighbour’s garden, you had to go knock and ask them if it was ok to please get it back and apologise, so to creep into someone else’s garden and take their belongings is just wild to me! Definitely get CCTV and I would report this on 101. Tell them you don’t want any further action, but you just want this logged in case something else happens.

That’s just ridiculous!!!!!! How or why they thought that’s acceptable is a mystery!!!!! But how did they get in your garden tho?

No it's not insane, this response is completely valid. Sounds like you have zero moral compass, just like the neighbor.

It wouldn’t bother me, I would just laugh but I am quite easy going and easy to get along with

So if they popped into your house (had a key to feed your cat) you'd be ok with them 'borrowing' the sofas? Or your bed?

That’s obviously not the same 😂 it’s just a bit of garden furniture

On the right I wouldn’t bat an eye.

On the left I’d call the police

🤷‍♀️

Some garden furniture is very expensive

Why's it not the same?

How about saucepans? Bed linen? The barbecue? Lawnmower? Blender? TV?

Are any of these okay to borrow, just because you can get at them?

Surely a good neighbour/friend would ask first?

Lawnmower would be fine