To be furious that my neighbour ‘borrowed’ my garden furniture for her BBQ?

[2coolec]

Went away for the weekend, came back Monday afternoon to find our patio table, four chairs, and parasol in next door’s garden.

Turns out she’d had a BBQ on Sunday and “thought we wouldn’t mind” if she borrowed them. Was “going to return it”. Only I found out because by Monday evening it was still all sat there and I saw her teenage son and his mates hanging out on my furniture.

No note. No text. Just helped herself. I wouldn’t even have known if I hadn’t looked over the fence.

I’m honestly livid. It’s not a small thing to borrow and she didn’t even ask. What if it had got damaged? Or gone missing?

AIBU to think this is beyond cheeky and actually borderline theft?

the problem is whatever you do you still have to live next to them and this could just be a catalyst to worst behaviour.

its wrong yes, your neighbours are absolute cheeky shits

but how you handle it could mean future years of grief.

id consider moving 😂

thankfully i've gotten on with all my neighbours and most have become friends, so we all borrow each others stuff regularly, and often a BBQ would mean we all would be invited anyway so 'would bring a chair' and some food etc.

but taking your furniture without asking is some crazy next level stuff.

This isn’t okay. I’d just take them back and next time I saw them ask them not to do it again as you’ll be needing them for your own events over the summer.

It was cheeky of them, but had they cleaned it and put it back and explained to me I would have been fine about it. But for it still to be there really not on.

report it stolen. Did that on a neighbour that kept ‘borrowing’ my son’s patio chairs from my garden. When the police turned up to their house it frightened the hell out of them. He was a school teacher and a police report would cause him so much trouble. Stopped immediately

Have you got the furniture back yet? Please do not bring it back yourself.

We have a holiday house, as is the one next door. We turned up one day to find our patio furniture in their garden and lots of cutlery and glasses and plates missing. The owners had friends who rented our place and took all our belongings next door for a bbq and left them there! Good job we arrived and not guests with no plates or cutlery and wine glasses! We were very unhappy and management company went in to retrieve everything.

My advice - get a camera for your garden.

What a bloody liberty. I was bought up to ask first before taking any that doesn’t belong to you. Whether you are good friends or even relatives on real good terms it doesn’t give you the right to assume that you can take or borrow stuff from people.Surely she could of text you first if she was desperate for needing more garden furniture. Don’t fall out about it as that will make life awkward but just tell that you are not amused. Just lock it away or anything else that she could take next time you’re away. Cheeky buggers.

If you don’t mind and trust them not to damage things I’d say to them if you ever want to borrow anything again to please ask, either in person or via a text if I’m away as I nearly reported it as a theft. Luckily just before calling I glanced over and saw everything in your garden.
We all get on well in our neighbourhood but none of us would borrow things/use someone’s drive for extra parking etc if they’re away without asking first. It’s just common courtesy!

i’m wondering if she’s done this before OP, and previously managed to return it before you got back.

Why do people post asking questions and get loads of replies and never update the thread?

What’s the reason they didn’t text you to ask?

My neighbour is one of my best mates and we wouldn't take anything from each other's garden without asking first (even though neither of us would mind and we have a key to each other's houses for emergencies/dog letting out/cat feeding etc). Dropping you a text to ask wouldn't have taken 2 mins... absolute CF!!

No update then? Surprise surprise

In quite new to MN amd this happens a lot doesn’t it - makes you feel a bit if a twat for bothering to invest in a thread and respond to the OP
Also makes you wonder if made up..,

I'd be fuming. Just taking your things without permission. I'd be having words with neighbours over this. What if it had got damaged?

I find it so rude when OP’s don’t bother returning to their post!

Exactly

OMG!!!!!!! Similar thing happened to us a week ago! We went away for the weekend, our neighbour phones to ask if they can use our parasol (since it was expensive I wasn’t comfortable with them moving it) so we said no…. Well they took anyway! My other neighbours messaged to say they saw them moving it!
I was exactly the same! Livid! Felt violated as such thing would never cross my mind! And like you it felt like theft.
spoke to a policeman about this and he said legally it couldn’t be qualified as theft but definitely trespassing
I just find the whole thing totally unacceptable

Very cheeky. I have an excellent relationship with a neighbor and they know that they can park on my driveway if they have visitors etc. They still message me each time before they do to double check it is still ok. Make sure you secure your garden. I would bet it is not the first time that they borrowed things.

This. Sounds like a large dose of CF-ery?!

Oh calm down. Some people have a life you know, and a busy one at that!

Yes, we all like an update of course, but don’t be a petulant child about it….

Erm, I'm perfectly calm and certainly not petulant...my point was this is probably another thread to get people all frothed up...i.e. made up.

But thanks for your comment

Read this thread before. Never an update, as it's a made up post for engagement?!

That’s called stealing.
The good thing is though, you can pop round and help yourself to anything you want in her garden.

The lack of updates is irritating in a thread, but what I find much worse is that @mumsnet themselves keep sharing these attention grabbing posts on X , days after they were first posted and obviously knowing the OP hasn't been back. Why draw more traffic to a thread with no replies from the OP?!