WIBU to reassure this child that my dog is friendly

[Allelbowsandtoes]

Hi,
This happened earlier today and I've been wondering about whether I was in the wrong or not.

I was walking earlier with my dog (she's s whippet and very lazy, usually either trots along beside me or sniffs things, not boisterous or anything). We were walking in a big local green space where there's always plenty of off lead dogs.

I was on a quiet, wide path in a wooded area. I came near some little girls who were with their mum. When I was about 4-5 metres away I could see one of the girls became very nervous and her mum advised her to stand back from the path and stay calm. My dog wasn't approaching her but was going to walk near her to get by so I called her back (she came immediately, we've trained recall extensively) and put her on the lead. As I was walking past I put as much space between us as possible but said to the little girl "don't worry, she's friendly " just to reassure her. Thd mum snapped at me "just because she's friendly, doesn't mean my daughter wants to say hello to her".

Tbh I was a bit pissed off, although I didn't say anything. If my dog had been greeting someone who didn't want to interact then that would have been a fair thing to say, but she was being really good.Then again, the girl was obviously scared and maybe has had bad experiences in he past?

Where was OP actively trying to encourage interaction?

There was no need for the woman to be rude

Your daughter is scared of dogs, then it’s quite simple don’t go to places where dogs are allowed off the lead, there are plenty of places, where dogs must be on a lead.
This is the problem, the people who are complaining on here, just don’t like dogs.And quite frankly, would prefer it, if dogs, weren’t allowed out in public, which is ridiculous and cruel.I bet you’re seething dogs are welcome in some cafes and pubs.

People have dogs off the leads all over the place whether they are allowed to or not. Play parks, cycle paths, woods.... I like dogs myself but yeah I don't think they should be allowed in cafes and restaurants unless they are outside. Especially ones that bark constantly.

Dogs are disgusting and I don't want one near me. I don't care how friendly you think it is with you. You have no idea if it may react particularly badly to someone for whatever reason.

That’s not what op said.
Where was this said, op’s dog was trying to interact with anyone, apart from just going on a walk, where dogs are allowed.Calm down 👏

Places allow dogs inside because it makes them more money.

The cafe in the middle of my local park welcomes dogs. They get a steady stream of regulars and their dogs. I love going there as I get to fuss lots of dogs, and my own dog gets fuss and a biscuit too.

Absolutely you’re right to not have to tolerate dogs. Disgusting is a tad harsh though. Many, many people receive a great deal of support or comfort from their dogs.

This is MN where all sense of reality is suspended when it comes to dogs. People post about how dogs should be banned because one looked at them. They want to go about and not be looked at by dogs.
Or an owner gave them a look because they didn't want to go and fuss their dog. A lot of mind reading seems to go on.

And there we have it, that’s what it comes down to, you hate dogs.Well, it’s perfectly legal, here in the uk, that’s why dogs are allowed in many cafes and pubs.

I agree with this. There are too many owners who have little control over their dogs (especially in SE England) and it only takes one or two unpleasant experiences to set up a negative stereotype. At first glance the mother over-reacted but I can understand why she may have done. Don't blame her, blame the tossers who let their dogs run riot with zero recall ability.

Where are all these places where dogs are legally required to be kept on leads? I know of none - unless you're referring to urban areas, such as in shopping centres, alongside busy main roads or actually on the road itself? I can't think of any countryside areas where there is an enforcement of dogs having to be kept on leads.

So, really what you're suggesting is that people who don't like, or are afraid of, dogs should just avoid going out to any countryside spaces?

I am not a dog person and spent much of my life being anxious near them, but calling them disgusting is a ridiculous extremist attitude. My partner has a couple of dogs and they are really well behaved and delightful, the only minor inconvenience being when they urinate on the floor and I accidentally step in it if I am going to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

As you are the second person to wilfully misinterpret this comment I’ll address it. The little girl was wary, obviously because she was worried she would need to interact with the dog. It might jump up at her (be friendly!), sniff her, or obviously attack her. The girl’s mother is obviously sick to the back teeth of the “he’s friendly” brigade forcing her daughter to have to deal with dogs and there COULD have been an interaction. If the op genuinely cared about the impact their choice to own an animal was on other people, it would be on a lead or recalled as soon as other people were in view.

Yes agree.You’ve summed it.

I am perfectly aware it is legal. Doesn't make it less disgusting.

Dogs are expected to be under control around livestock (such as on a lead or walking next to the owner). So quite a lit of the countryside

Are you being ironic? Urinating on the floor and then stepping on it IS disgusting! 🤣 it’s not their fault, they are animals and they can’t keep themselves clean but they ARE gross. I overheard a ridiculous argument recently where someone was arguing with someone else who didn’t want a dog to sit on their pillow. Just because you don’t want to believe they are unhygienic doesn’t mean it isn’t true

I think the suggestion is more live and let live.

You don’t have like dogs, but until the law changes you do have to accept that they are just as allowed to be off lead as we are.

Some nature reserves allow dogs but they have to be kept on a lead. Or walking through a field with livestock.

There is a park in the centre of my town where dogs are not allowed at all. But people still walk their dogs there, and allow their kids to play ball games (that is also banned).

You recalled your dog and put the dog on a lead which is the correct protocol.

the problem is that pretty much every horrible dog owner uses the phase “he’s friendly” to excuse bad behavior and imposing their dog on other people. It’s basically become code for, “my dog has the right to invade your space and even touch you whether you like it or not.”

All animals are gross as they are not human and don't have rules around hygiene etc.
Plenty of humans are not hygienic at all.

YANBU you handled the situation as any god dog owner would. Some of these posters and the mum need therapy.

You did exactly the right thing..... it's what I would say if ours were friendly.......as it is ours are haphazard noisy curmudgeons that have 2 speeds 0 and 100mph so ours are always on a lead. The bad thing is people saying their jumpy excitable unleaded dogs are friendly. I don't think the mother is doing their child any good by going OTT - treating all dogs are nasty....its encouraging an irrational fear instead of saying you keep away from dogs you don't know. After all we say keep away from strangers, we don't say all adults are evil.

But then again there is the other type of poster:

OP: I was minding my own business in the park with my family when out of nowhere a huge German Shepherd appeared. It started growling then charged towards us and ate our entire picnic before mauling my husband and biting my son's arm off! Wibu to say something to the owner?

Reply: yabu. I bet you hate dogs and the dog could tell. It was just defending itself. If anything you should have to pay the owner's vet bills. What if the poor dog choked on a bone?

Eta I'm not suggesting that you are that type of poster, faod.