Please tell me times where you've got the ick with a guy

[yeahhhhmate]

Lighthearted!! Just that really. I love hearing these

ill start:

went on a date with someone and we played shuffleboard and after every turn of his he would loudly exclaim 'GO ON THE TSG' (his initials) he also did it after random sentences like 'I'll get this drink, YES THE TSG)

another guy would say WOOP WOOP and BOOM after every sentence. He ordered a steak and said to the waiter 'I'm going to have the steak please, well done, (another ick) WOOP WOOP

Another guy we were DTD and he kept thrusting in a complete circular motion and I quite literally dried up and left

another DTD time and the guys top lip and nostrils would spasm / quiver - I could get past that though.

please tell me yours, I could do with a laugh!

Oh I have another!

this one's a catfish. Said he was 30 on his hinge profile. Has lovely thick jet black hair.

when I arrived I was greeted by what I can only describe as a 45 year old roll on deodorant.

@Dangermoo that had me howling but, tbf, none of us would look good naked, hunched over & throwing up 😂

I once dated this guy and just after we'd finished sex he must have been overcome with emotion or something because he kissed his own shoulder. I burst out laughing. He stayed with me in my shared house for a few nights & one morning he went to the bathroom & I suddenly heard my landlady exclaim "OH! I'm sorry!" He came back in my bedroom & his face was white. My landlady had walked in the bathroom & was greeted by his bare arse staring back at her. Why he didn't lock the door I've no Idea

He lived quite a distance from me so sent me a card & on the envelope he'd written "SWALK" over the seal. Inside he'd written "missing loads". I had to agree with him there! 🤣

The DJ in my local “niteclub” used to announce the “slowies” as “The Erection Section”…

Omg lol - this is like a sketch straight of ‘Goodness Gracious Me’ with the Cheque please! guy 😂. If ya know ya know!

Christ, you've just reminded me that I also have a self penned love song on YouTube. He also said he was head of wardrobe and working on loads of top films (My Mum and I couldn't find him anywhere on IMBD)

So many red flags and weird bloody icks that I told him he was nuts and dumped and blocked him on WhatsApp. He appeared under another number saying "Thanks for the character assassination. I had just cancelled Pirates of The Caribbean to spend some time with you instead"

Course you had, love. Utter fantasist and bellend!

He also turned up on Tinder pretending to be someone else (a paramedic) and went back to fantasy land saying "Oh, my friend has just sent me your picture and it seems like he also met you on here. Fuck him, date me instead. Blah blah.

My mother said she knew he was micey from his first messages (i used to ask her opinion on my online dating matches)

Initials RJ

Omg SWALK! Forgot about that, haven’t heard that used since I was about ten ha

That is really funny, I don't know how you didn't crack up.
🤣

I have another one.

I dated a guy I called 'Scientist' and went on holiday with my Mum a couple of weeks after meeting him. Day two of my holidays and I get a text from him saying "I've had to take the week off on the sick as I can't cope with you being away" My mother's response was Fucking hell Rainbow. Another bloody nutter. The rest of the week was texts from him saying he'd been physically sick etc.

I needed to get something from him when I returned home, so I got him to come round then said that was the end. He cried massive snot and tears and wailed "but I love youuuuuuu" I just asked him to please leave. He shuffled slowly down my hallway crying "Oh. Scientist, Scientist, Scientist you've done it again. Stupid, stupid Scientist"

Seriously unhinged, but lucky escape. Naturally he was the type of bloke who called his ex a psycho...

I found toenail clippings, perfectly stacked, on his bedside table. 🥴

Yeah, this guy was 34 at the time & I think I'm the only person he'd dated apart from his ex wife so must have been a bit out of practice on how to 'woo' someone 🤣

There are so real weirdos around!

I was going out with a man for about 8 months, really nice guy but he asked his mum to make a gp appointment for him to get a repeat prescription of his 'prescribed since birth' medication. His (retired) dad used to fill up his petrol tank when he stayed with them once or twice a week when he got all his washing done for him. He also took his car to the main dealer garage to get a bulb changed. Ick indeed.

he didn’t know what basil was.

English Was his first language.

Reminds me of the guy who was trying to chat me up and telling me that as his girlfriend I would never have to work, he would always be able to pay for everything. Then his mate came over and pointed out that he rented a small bedroom in his mates council flat and was hardly loaded 😂😂

At least he was tidy! 🤣

My DH is giving me the ick at the moment.
I have an illness and have a catheter bag strapped to top of my leg.
Every fucking time he sees it, he just can't resist making some sexual remark about it looking like a garter!
Fuck off!!!

Been together 35 years but this could be the deal breaker!!

He used the word 'clitoris' during sex, which would have been bad enough (couldn't he have picked a less clinical word?), but he then went on to compound his offence by pronouncing it 'clitORis.' 😬 My flaps have never slammed shut so fast.

(Apologies for crudeness btw, that just came out at random, but it made me laugh so I'm leaving it in. 😄)

I got the ick when the man I was dating and MAD about ( a golfer) called his penis 'Lucky Chucky' and said in a growly , 'cute" voice...' 'puppy wants to get lucky chucky in that hole'

Oh God. Run for rhe hills.

Good god!

Go for it 😂😂

I’ve just shown my bestfriend this thread and she just reminded me of a guy she was seeing when we was in our late teens, he used to like her going on top and whenever she did he would do that clip clip sound you do to horses

Someone needs to post this thread to Ian Dunt who is bleating on on social media about why left-wing men can't get laid

• there was a bit of blood on my pillow so I ask if he was OK, said it was a scab on his head that he'd had for months but wouldn't heal🤮
• massively stank my house out with disgusting IBS farts having knowingly eaten diary, a trigger food, twice🤮
• had no money, no job but very expensive tastes, needed to borrow a tenner or twenty quid here and there - embarrassing in a 40 something
• super needy, would call me 4 or 5 times a day about nothing, obviously bored having no job

I only lasted so long (6 weeks) because I'd known him decades before, and he had a chronic illness, but it was all too icky, ended it and wrote off £250 he still owed me!