To ask what you think to this? Is it selfish?

[Curlytwirly1]

If you knew that a single parent took a DC with active chicken pox to a shop? If they couldn’t get a delivery slot, and had no one to drop food off but fridge/cupboards empty.

A child needs to eat and if the only option is to take them to the shops then that’s what needs to happen.

I would think it’s sad that you don’t have help and that anyone who accused you of being selfish was actually very selfish themselves.

I appreciate that immunocompromised people might exist out in society, but so are small children and childhood illness is a normal part of life.

There has been very long standing advice about isolating for certain diseases. At least my whole life time. People have for many, many years been advised to isolate with chicken pox, measles, mupms etc. Chicken pox has very specific risks for specific groups of people and is much, much more contagious than covid.

I think the covid debacle has had the opposite effect to you. I think people are less likely to isolate with every single disease and more likely to think the longstanding advice is nonsense.

Im on a low income. A minimum wage job and universal credit but I prioritise food over other things. I would never be in a situation where there was no food in the house especially if I lived somewhere that had no delivery services and I had no family or friends all it takes is getting the flu or being hospitalised to be completely screwed. As an adult especially a single parent you need to be organised and prepared for every eventuality no excuses. I bet if you asked op to post a photo of her cupboards fridge and freezer their would be food in their what she means is their is no food they prefer in their and arent willing to make do for a couple of days.

Park up, leave 5 year old in the car with a book or tablet and the windows open enough for air, lock the car and dash in for the meds and bread and milk to see you through until tomorrow. Arrange a delivery for everything else.

As someone who had chickenpox at 30 weeks pregnant and was very, very ill, to the extent that I could have lost the baby, I can say, absolutely, that it is selfish and it is an issue.

I’m undergoing chemo at the moment and have to actively avoid anyone with chicken pox as it can be dangerous for me. If it can be avoided at all then try.

Is there really no company that will deliver at all to you where you live? Even if it comes at a premium?

So your only option at all is to go into a shop?

Even where my parents live in middle of nowhere you can get deliveries - just have to think ahead a tiny bit.

Have you really got nothing in the house you both could eat?

Agreed!

It’s always been the advice with chicken pox for the reasons many pps have set out.

And it’s not “hysteria” (nice internalised misogyny from that poster) to have some consideration for others.

I agree re Covid - people’s dislike of the lockdowns and the hypocrisy of the government of the day have led people to dismiss long standing advice re contagious illnesses.

It's fine. Rush in get what you need . Rush out . Don't let kid touch anything. You could catch chicken pox any where and at any time. Truly immunosuppressed people know the risks they are taking going out anywhere and live accordingly.

All the guilt tripping about pregnant women is unfair.

There is a vaccine for chicken pox that anyone who is TTC is free to get. Women have an option to protect themselves if they want to.

I see it as very similar to the debates on here about a father’s rights after conception. The usual MN consensus is that men have the opportunity to protect themselves before conception and if they don’t, they have to accept the consequences. They don’t get to assert control over other people’s bodies or actions because they failed to protect themselves. It’s the same thing.

I couldn't get worked up about this. Chickenpox, like most viruses, are most infectious before symptoms appear so pretty much every kid that's ever had chickenpox will have been taken out in public when unknowingly infectious.
Plus you don't have a choice of there is no-one to help/available deliveries, you have to eat.

I'm not immunosuppressed and yet was still made severely unwell and my unborn baby was at serious risk. Any little thing to help reduce the risk to others should be acted upon but you choose the "well, it will be their fault if they get it, they shouldn't be out and about" attitude because you just don't want the inconvenience of keeping your child at home.

No. If they were in a pushchair and not touching things needs must

It’s hardly about convenience when she needs to feed her child. It’s not like OP was asking about taking her child to soft play. People need to eat.

Do you honestly believe she has no food in her house? Or do you think its more about want rather then need

Please don’t. Chickenpox can be dangerous for some people. I’d beg a neighbour first. Or, if there’s a small local shop I’d try phoning them and asking them to get stuff ready for you so that you can nip in the pay while leaving the child in the car (obviously only if you can park where you can still see the car from the shop).

I’ve had chicken pox twice and a vaccine also twice. I’m still not immune and so no I didn’t have the ‘choice’ to protect myself during pregnancy just had to take the risk

Meh I wouldn’t judge you that harshly tbh. Yes there are probably means and ways of getting food in without going to the shops but also chickenpox is not the end of the world for most people and kids are contagious before actually getting the spots anyway in most cases. The reality is people are going about their lives with all kinds of infectious diseases, it’s annoying when you or your kid catch it but also that’s life to some extent.

I wasn't quoting OP but challenging@Brickiscool and the attitude that if you don't want to catch chickenpox (or any other horrible disease) because you are "truly" immunosuppressed, you shouldn't go out but live your life "appropriately". How about people with children who have chickenpox (or any other problematical infectious disease) don't go out, spreading it about? Everyone has to eat, yes of course, but in spite of what OP has said, there will be some way of getting food from somewhere until a delivery can be arranged which does not involve putting other people at risk.

If I lived somewhere that it wasnt easy to get something delivered same day, I wouldn't let it happen that I didn't always have some tins of soup/spaghetti whatever in the cupboard in case we got snowed or flooded in or something. So if going shopping really is your only option then do it but keep that in mind.... what if it had actually been an awful s&d case and you couldn't take them?!

Do a click and collect

Yes, because I’m often unorganised enough that there’s nothing but chips and peas in the freezer and pasta in the cupboard, and I’d want my child who is ill to receive more nutrition than that.

Maybe OP is super organised and meal plans, but her child got sick before she’d had a chance to do the next big shop, or she needed a quick top up shop to make what she already had into a decent meal.

Either way, she’s a single mum, caring for a sick child alone, and she needs food. Anyone who begrudges her popping into Tesco is a self centred arse.

You can catch chicken pox from being in the same room, you don’t have to be touching the infected to get it.

I know someone who had it as an adult and is very badly scarred, raised keloid scars all over their face and body.

Nhs says you can catch chickenpox from 15 mins in the same room not touching (eg supermarket) or any touching.

That's exactly proves my point you're classing chips pasta and peas as having no food in your house. Im seeing it as that will do for 2/3 days until I get a delivery slot. Especially if you have things like butter cheese flour etc in even if you dont its still food your cupboards arent empty.