Was this man in supermarket being unreasonable?

[Ididntaskyou]

I went to the supermarket today with my 10 year old.

I want to be very clear before I’m accused of drip feeding or being a menace in the shops. Ds is a very calm, quiet and well behaved child. He doesn’t mess around running riot in shops. We were doing the self scan and I was letting ds push the trolley and we were scanning things together.

Ds accidentally got in someone’s way with the trolley. I would actually say that he wasn’t so much in the way, a supermarket worker was pushing one of those huge carts with stock and was dashing around with it. Ds was a bit slow to react and I told him to watch out the way. At the same time a man with a basket was walking by.

It wasn’t even ds fault, more a case of supermarket worker, ds with our trolley and shopper man all in the same place. But in the interest of good manners I told to mind out the way. Which he did, but being a child he was a bit slow and I had to sort of direct him out of the way.

At which point shopper man decided to snap at ds to look where he’s going with THAT trolley.

Really got on my nerves. He wouldn’t have spoken to an adult like that or to a man. Adults are a pita with their trolleys all day so don’t snap at a child.

Kindly, this is a non-issue. Let it go.

Really? What exactly is the problem? Your son is going to encounter many types of people in life, he needs to learn to deal with them.

I would let it go but maybe consider would it be better all round if you push the trolley.

I think some people just don't like kids tbh. He could have been having a bad day himself and if you've had a lot going on it will get to you more than normal (I can sympathise with that!)

I do think it's not the worst thing in the world for kids to learn that other adults can tell them off though.

I do agree but ds wasn’t actually doing anything wrong so didn’t need telling off.

Is this really worth a mumsnet thread? Sounds like the many was pretty tame tbh! Such a non event

You seem confident he wouldn’t have snapped at an adult. I’ve seen many people snap at adults in this scenario. Also a child should only be pushing a trolley if capable of doing so, if they demonstrate a lack of capability it’s fair enough to be angry that they’re being allowed to push it. Adults don’t really have a choice and are assumed capable, and if they’re not probably still have to push the trolley anyway so it does engender less anger generally.

Yes you’re probably right, non issue.

For various reasons I’m running on empty today and this miserable man just pissed me off.

I did try to make it very clear that ds didn’t do anything wrong. Possibly he was a bit slow to react moving out of the way, but no more than half the adults in the shops are. He wasn’t causing a menace he was very calmly helping.

I'd probably let it go. It's the school holidays, your bairn didn't do anything wrong. Some adults are just weird when the kids are off school.

I had an older than me bloke tell me off and he was going to report me to the police not so long back because I kept getting in his way at Aldi. Then he had a rant to the lass on the checkout about it.

Some people are weird in shops.

Maybe he’s also running on empty and so this little non-issue also pissed him off.

Probably not but I’m not feeling great.

We’d braved the shops and the miserable man just got right on my nerves.

Quite possibly.

Sometimes I feel that as a woman I’m often on the receiving end of grumpy men’s bad moods. Whether in supermarkets or elsewhere.

I doubt he’d have ‘told off’ my dh for his perceived getting in his way.

Sometimes when things are bad it can be the smallest thing that tips you over the edge. Try not to dwell on it, your ds sounds lovely.

You’re right.

I actually hate the shops. I usually shop online if I can.

I'm not sure why you think he wouldn't have spoken to an adult like that. Sounds like a fairly normal grumpy overreaction that I've heard addressed to adults before.

There are a lot of angry miserable people around, unfortunately!

Next time, shout "Who asked for your input? Dickhead".

I must admit, I've encountered far too many kids in supermarkets who really shouldn't be pushing the trolly. They're either holding other people up, or generally dicking around. The parents either take no notice or just stand there grinning inanely, expecting you to find it as endearing as they do. The fact that you can't move past them or the kid has just run over your foot, doesn't seem to count. Maybe this man is just sick of kids pushing trollies for this reason.

I work in a supermarket and will be glad when the kids are gone back to school. Maybe I’m just miserable though.

Genuinely ds was being good as gold. I’m lucky, he’s very calm.

No one believes you though, they think kid in supermarket = menace.

He was a twat. Mumsnet in general seem totally intolerant of kids (ironic.) I had similar the other day, walking with 3 kids across a zebra crossing, dd was doddling a bit behind so I ushered her across ‘quick someone’s waiting’ Then he started revving his engine and moving forward like a bellend. She’s 8. If you can’t control your temper over every minor inconvenience maybe you should stay in your house and be miserable there.

He wouldn’t have spoken to an adult like that or to a man.

How can you possibly know this??

I think I'd have replied "fuck you" and carried on.

Supermarkets in the school holidays are a pain. Not everyone is delighted to see your darling child. You prob prefer shipping without DC.
You were both a bit grumpy - you were having a bad day, likely so was he.

I would move on. They'll be back in school before we know it.

Classy. Nice way to teach your child how to deal with rude people.