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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let my 8 year old daughter shave half her head

349 replies

Missymini · 28/07/2025 20:12

My daughter currently has a bob and she has decided she wants her hair cut shorter. We have looked together at pictures online and she likes the type were half the head is shaved and the remaining hair has a undercut. It feels quite drastic but I am tempted to let her as it is her hair we have discussed once it is done if she doesn't like it she will have to wait for it to grow out and she is adamant that is fine.

OP posts:
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Smurfette63 · 29/07/2025 14:47

Missymini · 28/07/2025 20:12

My daughter currently has a bob and she has decided she wants her hair cut shorter. We have looked together at pictures online and she likes the type were half the head is shaved and the remaining hair has a undercut. It feels quite drastic but I am tempted to let her as it is her hair we have discussed once it is done if she doesn't like it she will have to wait for it to grow out and she is adamant that is fine.

There is no way you are being unreasonable, like you said, it's her hair. Its the ideal age to let her experiment, hair is always growing so no style is permanent. Let her have the cut she wants, she will grow to know what she likes and dislikes by the time she hits her teens. What a lovely Mum.

Franpie · 29/07/2025 15:15

Missymini · 28/07/2025 20:44

This is the haircut she would like.

It would be 100% no from me. Kids rarely stick to one idea for long and so I would worry she’d either hate it straight away or regret it not long after.

For everyone saying hair grows back, yes it does but it takes a fucking long time. Around 6 inches a year. That’s a good couple of years before it’s shoulder length!

Nanatobethatsme46 · 29/07/2025 15:25

I know someone who let her child do this at age 6 and it looked awful. Not only did it look awful but the child was forever moaning that her head was itchy where the new hair was growing back
She also had very thick hair so it just didnt look right
Although she does attend an anything goes private school where they encourage this sort of thing as well as them dying their hair from a young age so they were all fine with it

CoughCoughLaugh · 29/07/2025 15:35

Just a few considerations:

-Does you school allow this kind of cut? Most don't and 5-6 weeks isn't long enough to grow it out to an acceptable length.
-That haircut takes a lot of upkeep, it would need straightening every day. Which will damage her young hair and become quite tedious. Will she be able to do it (I wouldn't like to think of your average 8 year old using straigtening tongs) or will you end up having to do it?
-This is a sophisticated, adult cut, it looks gorgeous on the (AI?) model, it will look quite odd on a little head.
-Unless you have a very particular kind of hair, not many people's will look or stay anything like that unless your daughter is planning on sitting still all day and not running around getting mussed up like most 8 year olds.
-Since your daughter likes sports, that haircut is going to drive her mad flopping around on one side.
-Rightly or wrongly, she will be judged by some as being rough for having a shaved head at that age.

ChandrilanDiscoDroid · 29/07/2025 15:57

FTR, I've had a pixie, undercut, or both continuously for about 15 years now and my styling "routine" was:

  • shower, wash hair
  • towel dry
  • finger style

Done. I do have to get it cut reasonably often, say every 6-8 weeks, but despite this terrible burden I muddle along. If she doesn't like it and wants to grow it out, she'll need some bobby pins but can skip the haircut schedule.

TheLovelinessOfDemons · 29/07/2025 16:04

My kids were allowed to have their hair however they wanted from 4. It's their hair and I hated the clothes and haircuts I was forced to have even younger than 4. It's hair, it doesn't do any harm.

TheLovelinessOfDemons · 29/07/2025 16:07

HeddaGarbled · 28/07/2025 20:17

Way too appearance focussed for an 8 year old. Don’t let her look at pictures like that online anymore.

What the fuck? I don't think saying she'd like her hair a certain way is "way to appearance focused".

Cherishednotspoilt · 29/07/2025 17:33

I'd let her, her body her choice (and its only hair. It grows back!)

independentfriend · 29/07/2025 17:56

Main risks are:

  • sunburn - she may have to put suncream on her scalp and will have a greater need to wear a hat. Is she responsible enough to do this?
  • school rules - you'll know the school the best.
OverVerdant · 29/07/2025 17:58

Good god no, she’s 8, not 18!!

Laura95167 · 29/07/2025 18:01

Samscaff · 29/07/2025 09:23

So why did you ask for opinions in the first place?

You are being rather disingenuous. There are plenty of short, practical hairstyles that would stop hair getting knotty but wouldn't be so drastic or attention-drawing.

Edited
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Just because someone asks your opinion doesnt mean theyre obliged to agree with it.

GiveDogBone · 29/07/2025 18:12

As longs as don’t see you on the front page (or indeed any page) of the Daily Mail complaining when she’s sent home from school on her first day back.

Some of the other replies need to get a life, it’s not like she’s asking to get a tattoo FFS.

cramptramp · 29/07/2025 18:52

She’s 8 🙄

Pessismistic · 29/07/2025 19:20

Can you do a photo of her with that hairstyle she is considering on the internet.. It’s ok to say it’s only hair but our hair can affect our self esteem and confidence otherwise people wouldn’t have bad hair days. at 8 if she really hated it would she still go to school. With it being shaved it will grow out differently to how it grows now. Plus some schools won’t allow it.

Trishyb10 · 29/07/2025 19:24

At 8 ? no… set some boundaries .. your the adult, your in charge at the moment

Justnevergetsthere · 29/07/2025 19:44

I let my daughter cut her hair short at 10 - graded up the back and sides, longer on top, and we haven't looked back. She has grown in confidence, and her friends love it. She absolutely dances to her own tune and doesn't conform to the norm and she's never been happier.

Supersares · 29/07/2025 19:55

I have an 8 yr old dd and couldn’t imagine her wanting to to this yet. It seems really young to be experimenting by shaving your head. Is she interested in fashion and make up too?

Jumpers4goalposts · 29/07/2025 19:55

My 8 year old is the same, it’s her hair so her choice but we’ve talked it through and we are going to move the side parting far over so as it grows out we can switch the parting and cover it.

NormasArse · 29/07/2025 20:08

I had that haircut in 1986!

As long as she’s not shaving it herself- crack on.

verityveritas · 29/07/2025 20:11

I don’t think there is anything wrong with the hair cut, but why don’t you down load an app, and show her what she would actually look like with that hair cut. At 8 she may have a bit of a fuller face, and the hair cut might not look on her as she thought it would, but then it would be too late to change, and you could end up with a very upset little girl. This way she actually gets to see if it would suit her, and if she’s still keen then crack on, but with a hairdressing app she can experiment with different designs and styles first.

MrsDuskTilldawn2point0 · 29/07/2025 20:24

We kind of have the opposite in this house. When he was 9 DS made noise about growing his hair so I let him. No harm in being in charge of your own hair, especially as we always try for positive body image and body autonomy. He has the thickest, honey coloured, wavy hair. It grew out really quickly and beautifully. When he was 11 he decided to chop it all off. Again, I was happy to arrange for it. A chat was had, that once it’s gone and he hated it, it would take a while to “fix” - he was fine. Well, he had it cut off and he hated it instantly. So he just let it grow again. He absolutely dealt with the consequences of his choices like a champ. 😂 He’s coming up to 13 and it’s shoulder length. He loves it. Doesn’t care what anyone thinks. Looks after it. Everyone thinks he’s dead cool. How he’s achieved this coming from me, heaven knows. 🤣🤣

NeedZzzzzssss · 29/07/2025 20:59

This is the most bizarre threadI have read. Who would have thought that grown women would have such strong opinions and give so much thought and analysis towards an 8 year olds hair cut.

CoughCoughLaugh · 29/07/2025 21:15

NeedZzzzzssss · 29/07/2025 20:59

This is the most bizarre threadI have read. Who would have thought that grown women would have such strong opinions and give so much thought and analysis towards an 8 year olds hair cut.

The OP asked for opinions. Why is it bizarre that people thought about it and tried to give thoughtful responses?

NeedZzzzzssss · 29/07/2025 21:21

CoughCoughLaugh · 29/07/2025 21:15

The OP asked for opinions. Why is it bizarre that people thought about it and tried to give thoughtful responses?

Show quote history

Yes I'm surprised at the extent of those opinions 😅

LadySuzanne · 29/07/2025 21:24

NeedZzzzzssss · 29/07/2025 20:59

This is the most bizarre threadI have read. Who would have thought that grown women would have such strong opinions and give so much thought and analysis towards an 8 year olds hair cut.

You could ask why does a mum feel the need to run it past a forum in the first place?

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