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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To cancel next holiday?

118 replies

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:02

Just back from a week in a beautiful and very family friendly part of the UK. It was hard work with DCs 6 and 8. We did fun activities and had down time at our lodgings … the youngest spent the whole time complaining, saying she’s bored, when can we go home etc etc. the eldest wasn’t as bad and enjoyed activities more but did have a mega meltdown as soon as we arrived at a place I’ve wanted to go for years… I wish we hadn’t gone as to go and have it ruined seems worse than not going somehow. Eldest also spent a lot of time squabbling with her sister. It’s just parenting with fewer tools isn’t it? I wasn’t expecting it to be like a pre child holiday, we just wanted a change of scenery and to spend some quality family time. We went out for a few meals (checked menus before going to ensure there were plain foods that they liked)… they still moaned and didn’t eat much.

they are good kids but perhaps still too young to have decent holidays. Perhaps just a couple of nights somewhere close to
home is more reasonable.

We are also booked to go to Crete in October, 11 nights, and I can still get a full refund less £200 deposit (package holiday). I’ve to decide by 8th August.

Honestly thinking it’s easier/better to cancel and stay at home … perhaps I’m being a bit bab humbug as dust not yet settled. There’s loads to do in the house and maybe the £3k would be much better used that way, rather than on 11 days of whinging and squabbling.

Husband says he understands and sees where I’m coming from … but is leaning towards still going to Crete (but ultimately doesn’t mind if we cancel).

would you still go?!

OP posts:
Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:03

*bah humbug

OP posts:
Tiswa · 25/07/2025 14:03

surely you have been away before

but yes I would go

coxesorangepippin · 25/07/2025 14:04

I'd go to Crete if the kids love swimming/beaches etc

Not sure if the place that you went to where it was a disaster is a historical place, but I wouldn't expect small kids to enjoy castles/historical places really - that's for you to do when you retire lol

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:04

We have been to Spain to an all inclusive when they were much younger. It was “okay”. They mainly enjoyed the soft play in the windowless basement. That was a few years ago so we thought we’d try again.

OP posts:
coxesorangepippin · 25/07/2025 14:05

At that age I'd do more picnics personally

I know it's not as nice as eating out but it's just so much easier - as long as it's not raining etc

ThreenagerCentral · 25/07/2025 14:06

I would keep the holiday. Partly because it’s been so long since I’ve been abroad I can’t imagine cancelling whatever the circumstances, but also because I bet that despite their moaning, your children actually will have fond memories of your family time.

AllotmentHappy · 25/07/2025 14:06

Id cancel with kids attitude like that. They wont appreciate it

Definitelynotme2022 · 25/07/2025 14:07

Is there a kids club? Day time entertainment for the kids? I'd go anyway, they can swim and play on the beach.

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:07

ThreenagerCentral · 25/07/2025 14:06

I would keep the holiday. Partly because it’s been so long since I’ve been abroad I can’t imagine cancelling whatever the circumstances, but also because I bet that despite their moaning, your children actually will have fond memories of your family time.

We are currently in our local park and I can overhear them telling their pals about all the things they did on holiday. HAHAHA. Maybe holidays are better in retrospect.

I will say that despite the whinging it was nice to see a different part of the uk, totally different landscape, nice views from lodgings etc.

OP posts:
Onthewaytothemountains · 25/07/2025 14:08

I'd cancel. You have plenty more years to take them on holiday, and you won't spend the next few months dreading it.

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:09

Definitelynotme2022 · 25/07/2025 14:07

Is there a kids club? Day time entertainment for the kids? I'd go anyway, they can swim and play on the beach.

Not in the hotel I have chosen, it’s a really nice but quieter one. I am able to change the hotel as well as cancelling. So I may look at a more kids-clubby hotel (will be more expensive and not quite as “nice”). That’s a middle ground option.

OP posts:
Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:11

coxesorangepippin · 25/07/2025 14:04

I'd go to Crete if the kids love swimming/beaches etc

Not sure if the place that you went to where it was a disaster is a historical place, but I wouldn't expect small kids to enjoy castles/historical places really - that's for you to do when you retire lol

We did go to one place of historical interest (the place I really wanted to go). The rest was very child focused! Still moaned. They seem to like being at home best of all (me and husband get so bored though!!)

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Yabberwok · 25/07/2025 14:17

Perhaps it's time for the "mummy and daddy work very hard to be able for us to go on holiday. Lots of children don't get even a single holiday in a year and we are going for another one soon. Just think when it's raining and cold in England, we will be in the sun, playing in the pool, eating ice cream " about a month before you go just to reinforce how much effort you put in and how much fun they are going to have.

ReluctantBikini · 25/07/2025 14:19

Kids just don't notice changes in landscapes and nice views.

I'd head to Crete with a child focused hotel. Take things for them to play in the pool with.

UsingAMansNameInAWomensWorld · 25/07/2025 14:20

Did you ask what they wanted to do?

This all sounds like "my husband and I wanted to go on a holiday and we had to drag the kids with us and then they whinged and ruined our holiday"

Tiswa · 25/07/2025 14:23

Every holiday we have ever been on DS has the same highlight - some kind of food he is now 12 and this one in Portugal it will be steak! To the point when we had his reception visit his answer to the holiday question was wafers

they have different demands and different things to get joy from - and it’s about balancing needs of evefyone

every holiday is a learning experience

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:24

UsingAMansNameInAWomensWorld · 25/07/2025 14:20

Did you ask what they wanted to do?

This all sounds like "my husband and I wanted to go on a holiday and we had to drag the kids with us and then they whinged and ruined our holiday"

Did you see the comments where I said it was mostly child focused with activities for the children? We only went one place I wanted to go. The rest of it was all for them and they were allowed to choose what we did. It’s a very very child friendly place. Lots of parks and attractions just for kids.

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Coconutter24 · 25/07/2025 14:24

I wouldn’t cancel the holiday. So many things to entertain them, pools, beaches, trips out etc

doodleschnoodle · 25/07/2025 14:25

I think you just have to downgrade expectations. Pool, ice cream, play park, anything else is a bonus. Prepare to abandon ship or amend plans depending on how the day is going. Don’t over-schedule or try to cram too much stuff in. Even if they are willing, too many big activities is just too much. One day a big activity then a day off doing pool/playpark/chilling out works well for us.

We just came back from a two-week holiday that included two days at Disney. They enjoyed Disney, went on all the rides, but when I asked what their favourite bit of the holiday had been it was the play park at Eurocamp and the little birds who would come on our patio looking for dropped food!

Minecroft · 25/07/2025 14:26

doodleschnoodle · 25/07/2025 14:25

I think you just have to downgrade expectations. Pool, ice cream, play park, anything else is a bonus. Prepare to abandon ship or amend plans depending on how the day is going. Don’t over-schedule or try to cram too much stuff in. Even if they are willing, too many big activities is just too much. One day a big activity then a day off doing pool/playpark/chilling out works well for us.

We just came back from a two-week holiday that included two days at Disney. They enjoyed Disney, went on all the rides, but when I asked what their favourite bit of the holiday had been it was the play park at Eurocamp and the little birds who would come on our patio looking for dropped food!

Edited

haha yes mine enjoyed feeding the ducks at the edge of a lake.

OP posts:
cardibach · 25/07/2025 14:26

coxesorangepippin · 25/07/2025 14:04

I'd go to Crete if the kids love swimming/beaches etc

Not sure if the place that you went to where it was a disaster is a historical place, but I wouldn't expect small kids to enjoy castles/historical places really - that's for you to do when you retire lol

Small kids can absolutely enjoy castles and historical places! (Source: me as a child, my DD and all the children of my family and friends). Castles are great! Lots of bloodcurdling games to play and open space to run around. Most historic buildings have child friendly sections and tasks too.

RantzNotBantz · 25/07/2025 14:28

What do they do at home that keeps them happy?

To be honest I would have had firm stern words at their moaning and whinging.

mummyh2016 · 25/07/2025 14:28

Abroad holidays imo are easier. Only thing I would say is I’ve been to Greece in October and it pissed it down all week. I’d consider changing to the Canaries unless there is something in Crete in particular that you want to go to.

cardibach · 25/07/2025 14:30

ReluctantBikini · 25/07/2025 14:19

Kids just don't notice changes in landscapes and nice views.

I'd head to Crete with a child focused hotel. Take things for them to play in the pool with.

They are 6 and 8. Of course they notice things being new and different! I did child focussed hotels when DD was at the lower end of that range and below but by 8/9 she didn’t want kids clubs and enjoyed new experiences and yhings to look at. I know all kids aren’t the same, but your suggestion isn’t inevitable.

EggnogNoggin · 25/07/2025 14:31

How do you normally parent to manage that behaviour?

I'll admit that I was once pushed too far and told my dd, who was under 6 at the time, that we'd worked hard to do something that we thought would be nice for the family and her moaning was spoiling it and if she carries on then we will have a spoilt afternoon as well, at home in the lodge with no TV, treats or fun.

The short sharp shock worked and while it may not work for you.

but there is something to be said for recognising that they genuinely prefer being at home and perhaps that's the better option for them at this age.