To cancel next holiday?

[Minecroft]

Just back from a week in a beautiful and very family friendly part of the UK. It was hard work with DCs 6 and 8. We did fun activities and had down time at our lodgings … the youngest spent the whole time complaining, saying she’s bored, when can we go home etc etc. the eldest wasn’t as bad and enjoyed activities more but did have a mega meltdown as soon as we arrived at a place I’ve wanted to go for years… I wish we hadn’t gone as to go and have it ruined seems worse than not going somehow. Eldest also spent a lot of time squabbling with her sister. It’s just parenting with fewer tools isn’t it? I wasn’t expecting it to be like a pre child holiday, we just wanted a change of scenery and to spend some quality family time. We went out for a few meals (checked menus before going to ensure there were plain foods that they liked)… they still moaned and didn’t eat much.

they are good kids but perhaps still too young to have decent holidays. Perhaps just a couple of nights somewhere close to
home is more reasonable.

We are also booked to go to Crete in October, 11 nights, and I can still get a full refund less £200 deposit (package holiday). I’ve to decide by 8th August.

Honestly thinking it’s easier/better to cancel and stay at home … perhaps I’m being a bit bab humbug as dust not yet settled. There’s loads to do in the house and maybe the £3k would be much better used that way, rather than on 11 days of whinging and squabbling.

Husband says he understands and sees where I’m coming from … but is leaning towards still going to Crete (but ultimately doesn’t mind if we cancel).

would you still go?!

This, and explain to them why.

Crete? I'd cancel, they would probably be even more miserable!

I think your recent holiday sounds quite full on- especially combined with the end of term tiredness. I think active holidays are possible- we have taken DS to Brazil to Iguazu, jungle treks in Thailand etc but interspersed with pool days.

In reality, we all enjoy a kids focused hotel and do the odd trip. Lanzarote/Tenerife have worked well for this as the hotels are family friendly with slides/kids club/mini disco then interesting trips/walks/bike rides for us.

Why 'surely'? There are plenty of circumstances that mean this could be a first holiday - including personal choice, logistics of getting time off work, caring responsibilities and finances.

We are in Scotland , they broke up 3 weeks prior to departure

Definitely go for kids club. And always be snacking to avoid them getting even slightly hungry. And remember they will be tired! If they look like they are annoying each other, divide and conquer.

remember, holidays with children are not ‘breaks’ for adults.

Ok? I literally just meant it as shorthand for ‘a family who has a National Trust pass’ 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m not claiming to own the National Trust or anything 😂

I would keep the holiday. An AI type holiday to Crete will be so much easier than what sounds like a sightseeing holiday.

What was the place you’ve always wanted to go to?

Oh you’re fine. To me it means a family who like to get good value for money days out with plenty of outdoor space. Thats one reason we have it anyway!

In my eyes the NT is as much a service station as anything else! 😂

i have decided to change the hotel to one right on a sandy beach (blue flag beach / “green beach”) with very good kids entertainment (a lot of the reviews mentioned this) and some modest water slides. It’s a nice hotel with subtropical gardens and the beach looks fab. Has indoor pool too. Not somewhere I’d book without kids (I’d be up a mountain in a rustic guesthouse!) but I do think we will have a better holiday. Husband didn’t want to change to Canaries but tbh we live in Scotland and most of us are ginger so we aren’t worshippers, so stuck with Crete.

its costing £1k more but hopefully will recoup that by not having to pay for as many days out / meals.and even if not.

thanks for all the advice!

We did many years of Eurocamp etc to get round the whinging. Kids club, mini disco and a great pool complex. Chance to make friends with other kids. Separate bedrooms and ability to self cater if we wanted. It's pointless spending ££££s on small kids.

Glad you are still planning to go. I hope you all have a much better holiday - you should come back and update after the holiday!

So I know kids on holiday can be just same shit different place —-and emotions and expectations are running high. However to those saying kids need kid stuff and not anything historical; we’ve got a national trust pass and take our kids on days out to historical places all the time. It’s been a really good investment and they love it! We do kid friendly stuff there like the play park, ice cream and often a whole family game of hide and seek. If we go on holiday for a week we might do one really kid focussed thing like a theme park or high ropes. We recently holidays with friends who do more and I think it was a bit overwhelming for the kids. May be just mine but I think they need downtime and decompression (as do I!)

And definitely go to Crete!

Yeah my parents live three hours away so it’s great to find one to pop into on the drive up to break up the journey :) Much more entertaining than a service station 😅

I would still go but change hotel. Crete is wonderful. We stay at Kiani Beach Resort when we go. It is not a huge resort but does have a kids club. You can catch a local bus from the top of the road to take you into Chania. The resort, a few holiday homes, a taverna and the beach are the only things along there but it only 10 minutes from a bigger town or 30 minutes from Chania. So peaceful but not remote.

My children are the same ages @Minecroftand I think it’s far more relaxing if you plan the holiday with their needs in mind. If they are well rested and relaxed it’ll be much more fun.

We did a few holidays with family when they were younger, always planned around the other adults’ preferences and it meant I got very little time to relax at all. It was miserable tbh. For the last two years I’ve taken them away alone (lone parent) to AI hotels and it’s been brilliant. I’d never done AI holidays previously but it works very well with children. IKOS hotels are great in terms of having all of the benefits of AI but without being overrun/ having to endure buffets or bad food/ sunlounger wars or irritating and tacky “entertainment” etc, so it’s nice for adults as well, and I’m sure there must be others that are similar.

We have the odd day out or trip out elsewhere for dinner but it’s lovely for me to mostly relax on the beach/ by the pool while they play and swim, then everyone is happy. If we were self-catering we’d need to be out and about most days which is exhausting for everyone.

Unlike many other posters I find that actually two weeks is better than a week for us. If we go for a week my children spend the first three days adjusting and the last three getting sad about the holiday being over soon, so we only really get to properly enjoy it for one day in the middle of the week! Two weeks gives enough time for everyone to rest, settle, then feel enthusiastic about exploring a bit but with trips sufficiently spaced out for it not to get tiring.

I think that Crete is best earlier in the summer, though. Countries further west are better for autumn in terms of daylight and less variable weather.

Go on the holiday.

Get the kids out of their comfort zone more often and it’ll get easier.

Do it more - not less.

You want (and need it) and they will learn so much more being away and it won’t be like that previous holiday.

Use positive affirmations; new places are exciting/ we are going to learn so many new useful things/ I can’t wait to tell X about our trip.

Do more smaller trips (as much as budgets allow) to reinforce that this is normal and not scary.

Rome wasn’t built in a day ;)

You did a great job taking them away already.

Don’t rely on the feedback you’re getting from the kids now as they have no perspective.

Focus on the feedback you’ll get from them in 10-20 years time ‘remember that trip to X it was eye opening because of Y & Z’.