To think you don't just walk in

[Eerrnohun]

Yesterday afternoon, sitting on the floor playing with my son. I hear the a knock at the front door and before I had time to get on to my feet, my aunt is bursting through the front door.
Didn't know she was planning on coming over so was very taken back at her just bounding in.

Even if I had known she was going to come over, I'd still expect her to wait until I'd answered the door. I don't enter her house, or anyone else's house without being invited in. We're not super close - see each other once every couple of months or so, so it's not like she's round all the time and just felt so welcome to let herself in.

AIBU to think it's rude as hell to just walk in?

And before anyone says it, yes I'm aware locking the door would stop people walking in but DH was in and out throughout the day.

For some people, this would be entirely normal. If you don’t like it, it’s up to you to say so.

I wouldn’t say rude - more a generational thing. Chapping the door then shouting “hello” whilst walking in was the way I was brought up.

When I was a child, at my GP's house, in the Midlands, this was completely normal.

Everyone, from family, to neighbours, to the "home help" to the postman, would knock loudly on the back door (always the back door) then shout "YooHoo" loudly as they walked in.

I've never known if it was just that house/street/area, or something else, but I've never experienced it anywhere else, albeit that for me, that would mostly be SE Engalnd.

One does not simply walk into Mordor.
Sorry, couldn’t resist 🤣

Well depends on the relationship - clearly her boundaries are different to yours.
Might be worth the extra hassle of locking the door to avoid a repeat?

In my 1920s house the living room has a door knocker - because front doors were either open or unlocked!

Yeah this really. We used to have a door that people could walk in and out of - didn’t bother us and it was easy enough to lock if we didn’t want to be interrupted.

My Mum did this the other day, the difference being we were expecting her, and she knew I was working, so wouldn't have wanted to interrupt me. Your Aunt was rude.

Lock your front and back doors and then problem solved.

People do it to me, because they know my front door is never locked and I'm usually out in the garden. But then they presume the dog losing her shit is enough to warn me there's someone at the door.

On the other hand, I NEVER walk into someone's house. I knock and wait, and I feel most uncomfortable and unnatural if they tell me to just walk in; as though I am committing a dreadful social faux pas.

So keep the door locked. Surely that’s something you do with a small child? Are you worried they will get out?

With family and close friends it’s a normal thing to for us.

That said, it doesn’t happen very often.

My FIL did this all the time until I asked him to stop. It was an awkward conversation really cos I know he wasn’t doing it to be nosey or out of entitlement whatever, just that he considered it normal. Always a tap, then he’d open the door and shout ‘hello?’ and wander in.

Conversely whenever I went over to his house I’d knock and wait even when he said ‘Oh just come on in! No need to wait!’ No, there is a need to wait.

Normal for our family - all my adult kids, mum and sister have a key! If you don't want her to do this, keep your door locked so no-one can walk in. Probably sensible if you've got a little one in the house!

I don't like it, and I had some teething issues with in-laws after I moved closer to them. But all sorted now. I do think some people just don't mind it, but I do. I generally don't like uninvited visit to my house either.

It obviously isn't the norm in your family OP and yes that would irritate me. My parents have a key to our place but when they come to stay they always ring the doorbell first (initially) I guess to be polite. It wouldn't bother us if they let themselves in.

I hate this. Our front door is locked if shut, it can’t be left unlocked. But my family open the gate to our back garden and just walk straight in through our French doors. I don’t walk around the back of anyone’s house. I think it’s incredibly rude.

Lock your doors!!

I don't think anyone should be just ringing the bell and walking in unless you've told them they can.
On the other hand, it does show you that if you leave your door unlocked, anyone could walk in off the street.

Depends on you I suppose & what you’re used to. The only people who would knock on my door would be PIL if they ever came round, all my family & friends just walk in.

My boys would just let themselves in but then they would also have warned us by a call or text that they are coming over.

Our youngest’s carers will just let themselves in, but again, it is because we are expecting them.

I would never just walk into someone’s house. It’s polite to knock and wait.

Jesus, my in-laws do this. They come round to the back of my house and just let themselves in. Unannounced. Makes me more angry than just about anything else. I usually learn they’ve turned up when their unruly dog comes barrelling into my home.

Yes this is one of those things where there are two distinct camps. It's perfectly normal and okay for many people, and definitely not normal or okay for many others.

I would venture that as you don't like it, you probably should keep your door locked - after all if your (hopefully) friendly aunt can just walk in then so can anyone else!

FWIW I am definitely in the I don't like it camp and I'd never just walk into someone's house. DH's family is the opposite - they all leave their doors open and just walk in to each others' homes.

Thank God it was just your aunt who walked in…

Lock your doors or face the consequences.

I wouldn't like it but if you have a front door that can be opened from the outside there may be an assumption that you are fine with knock and enter.

My front door has a latch so even if it isn't double locked with the mortice (we do this when out and overnight) you have to open it from the latch from inside unless you have a key. I'd have to fix the latch open for it to be opened from the outside but then it would just swing open in the breeze which is a bit of an advert to burglars and drafty. I do live in a busy town centre though. It must be very safe where you live!

I lock the door but with close family I wouldn’t mind this. At my grandparents I’d walk right in, my sisters I’d knock then check the door and go in if unlocked. It’s kind of seen as saving them going to the door when you know you’re welcome to come in. Maybe she thought you’d have your hands full with your son?

I wouldn’t do it with all family though and always message before going round somewhere!