To think it is upsetting to be unfriended and blocked on Facebook no matter how rational we are about it?

[TrayGertie]

I friend requested some of my old school friends on Facebook and one woman who sat next to me in quite a few subjects initially accepted my friend requests then but has now blocked me! I’m baffled by this anx no matter how rational I try and be about it it’s upsetting

AIBU?

Just because she sat next to you in school years ago doesn't mean that nowadays she is interested in your Facebook posts. Get over it.

Lots of posters will try to claim you're being childish to care, but it's hurtful.

I got randomly blocked by an acquitance. I met her at a baby class. We had friends in common and she lived nearby, so I sent her a friend request. She didn't accept, and at some point blocked me. Feels so passive aggressive to block me!

To be blunt and truthful:

Don’t take it to heart, but she just doesn’t want to be a part of your life. She doesn’t feel the need for you to see what she’s up to / what you’re up too. Maybe she has kids or is quite private and has decided she doesn’t want someone she used to be friends with years back at school seeing her posts.

After you became fb friends did you interact with each other? Chat etc?

Oh this happened to me, and it just reinforced what I had always thought of her when she was a girl. Nosey but aloof, a false friend. So I wasn't bothered.

I did it to someone who wronged me, and she seems to think (I heard) it was because I suddenly became a homophobe. I wish she would try looking inward, fgs.

The point is surely that she accepted then blocked. Why accept in the first place? Unless it was to see who it was but if you don't recognise a name then don't accept. Or just mute posts. To block seems overly dramatic.

I am that woman. Well used to be because nowadays noone tries anymore. I have no intention of having former school acquaintances from 20 years to who I didn't speak for decades on fb...
She probably accepted as mistake so blocked.
I think your reaction is ott

Yes it’s hurtful and you feel snubbed. Comfort yourself it says more about her than you.

I reckon she’s the type to have a good nose at what you’ve been doing and doesn’t want
to renew the friendship.

I honestly couldn't give a shit

Good grief there’s not one part of me that could care. It’s not remotely upsetting they’re a random

I used to work with a very nice woman and happily accepted her friend request on fb.

Her Facebook feed was full of endless pictures of her cats interspersed with occasional pictures of nearly naked men.

I quietly unfriended her.

I have an old school friend who only posts Change.org petitions- up to 5 a day.

I quietly unfriended her.

I don’t post much on FB, just the occasional holiday pic, or if the kids have done something interesting (so about 4 or 5 times a year at most).

Another old school friend puts a snarky comment on every single picture of my children.

I quietly unfriended him.

I really liked all these people when I saw them regularly. I’d be happy to bump into them in the street but their Facebook usage doesn’t match mine and I dont want to see their posts on my timeline.

Yeah it is a bit, but we really shouldn't care.

Sometimes I block people if I'm feeling a bit fragile about something... Like I'll block the skinny fitness buff when I'm feeling down about being fat.... When I was trying (and failing) to conceive I blocked the friend who kept having and posting about her babies....I block my millionaire friends at times when I'm feeling low about being broke and I can't afford to pay all my bills....I don't want to see them on their tenth holiday of the year.. it's too much
.
It's my problem, not theirs... So don't take it to heart....

Sorry to hear this it just doesn’t make sense does it ?

no we didn’t

It depends on who it is for me. I have a lot of old school friends on there who I have no interest in talking to, I probably wouldn't even notice if I was deleted. If it was an old friend who I'd been really close to and was still interested in their life it would be upsetting and feel like a rejection.

The woman didn’t sit next to you, the child did, you don’t know the woman that she is today.

I have been added by school acquaintances and they don’t know me at all so I don’t accept. Some people are private. Just because you went to school with someone doesn’t mean you have the right to be their Facebook friend.

A person I went to school with from primary school added me last week because I bumped into them at the train station, they must have looked me up after that. I hadn’t seen them since year 6 and I’m late 30s.

I mean … it depends who it is. Close friends, coworkers , family etc? Sure. Someone from years ago? Nope. In fact I frequently delete people off my list if we haven’t spoken in years and there’s nothing on their feed that interests me. I don’t block them though.

I think some people like to make a point of deleting
Someone I know deleted me recently and kept all of our mutual friends (some of which she met via me) and my partner,but I didn’t even notice until she came up as a friend suggestion 🤣🤣🤣 I rarely post on fb so doubt I offended her. The only thing I can think of now looking at it is that I didn’t congratulate her on her pregnancy… but only because I hardly use FB. She’s a bit precious.
Weirdly I noticed she still follows me on other platforms. I honestly count give a flyer- trying to figure out someone else’s shit is not something I have the energy for x

It’s strange to even notice somebody you knew potentially decades ago had blocked you.

I delete people without a second thought if they are not in my life.

I blocked/deleted everyone from school on FB and have none of them on instagram (never added them in the first place). The reason is because I wasn’t a happy teenager and don’t want to see anything that would even vaguely remind me of that time in my life. The only friends I keep in touch / socialise with are ones I’ve made since I graduated university and moved to London. So from age 22.

I can’t imagine my experience is that uncommon. So perhaps that’s what’s going on here, OP. In any case, absolutely do not take it to heart.

I quite like hearing from people I haven’t seen for years and years.

It’s lovely to see that the scallywag from primary school is now and upstanding citizen or that the girl who bullied me for being geeky is now terribly proud of her extremely geeky son 😆💕

I only every clear out people who’s timeline behaviour doesn't meet my standards 😆😆😆

But other people unfriend those who don’t post often (like me) or who don’t share political opinions etc. Some people just take social media breaks and unfriend everyone except close family.

My friends number goes up and down regularly, I very rarely have any idea of who has dumped me so I wouldn’t ever be upset.

Well, surely she accepted to see whether the OP posted about anything interesting, and when she discovered it was endless details of her skin care routine, or photographs of her cats/children/quilts, she decided to opt out?

Anyone I have any real interest in is on WhatsApp.

On FB I don’t know who follows me, or who I follow .. I only really use it for local news.

to be unfriended and blocked hurts, but I really wouldn't be fussed about somone not replying to friend request, especially on such a tenuous connection, sorry.

I think a few possible explanations
Wanted to see who it was
Wanted to see what you posted about and if it interested them
Was accidental add
Has a max number of e.g 200 friends and Wanted to see if your content merited deleting someone else.

If we think about it, its just noseyness isn't it - on the part of the requester or the adder. A request, with no message to someone from decades ago.

Some people are advised to delete FB "friends " where the friend isn't active on FB - as you cant tell if its really them or someone pretending. So much at play.