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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a two hour sesh sounds hellish?

318 replies

MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 14:48

Just been away for a weekend with a male friend. During one conversation we got on about sex somehow, and he said he thought anything less than a two hour session is a waste of time.

Good for him I suppose, but AIBU to think the majority of people would find this far too long and start planning their dinner?

Before anyone says he’s trying to impress me or get me into bed, he’s not.

OP posts:
neverbeenskiing · 18/07/2025 18:58

Ugh, no thanks. I think some men assume that all women need lots of foreplay to orgasm. For me personally, if foreplay goes on for too long it ends up being counterproductive. I sort of 'miss the window' and nothing happens my end.

Hotflushesandchilblains · 18/07/2025 19:05

Oh god, is he one of those who prides himself on how long he can last. A friend had a husband like that - but that all stopped sharpish after he caught her looking at her watch one day.

Anyahyacinth · 18/07/2025 19:06

People who try to boast like this are saying they don't know how to achieve orgasm, know how to please another to me...how out of touch with your body are you if it takes that long?! Sounds like extended tedium not pleasure. Unless its the p🌽 side effect of going blunted to pleasure? Sad all round

Sonolanona · 18/07/2025 19:07

15 mins tops thanks... After that it cuts into my sleep time... nope!😆

murasaki · 18/07/2025 19:08

Also clock watching is not sexy.

Sunshineismyfavourite · 18/07/2025 19:12

Never mind planning dinner, I would have needed to pause for a snack.

columnatedruinsdomino · 18/07/2025 19:19

'He's either really, really good at it or really, really bad at it' said someone in a sitcom once. I think it applies here.

Imaybeoldbutstillrandy · 18/07/2025 19:21

lastapache · 18/07/2025 15:26

Good God, even 30 minutes is too long. I would be SO bored. I'm sure he's a lovely fella but he needs a check up if it takes him that long to orgasm, and if he's holding back - why? Is it because it's what he thinks the woman wants? Because it sure isn't. He's 40, he should definitely know better at this stage.

I suspect he does know better, was saying it because he thought it would be something that made him sound great and bed, and that just shouts insecure to me.

Assume that we're not talking about 2 hours of pumping away - that would make anyone sore, not to mention bored. 😂

Bink666 · 18/07/2025 19:26

murasaki · 18/07/2025 18:54

His 'two hours' is probably the equivalent of 'it was this big' when men catch a fish.

It wasn't.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Spooky2000 · 18/07/2025 19:27

Honestly, although you say he's not trying to impress you, I think he must be. Some men seem to think this indicates 'staying power'. 🙄

Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 18/07/2025 19:37

Depends on my mood and what time i have but I love a mix of a good long sesh and quickies and everything in between!

Edited for typo lol

CountryQueen · 18/07/2025 20:32

You’re very defensive of someone who’s clearly trying to gauge whether you fancy a 2 hour sesh with him 🤣

Original poster
MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 20:43

CountryQueen · 18/07/2025 20:32

You’re very defensive of someone who’s clearly trying to gauge whether you fancy a 2 hour sesh with him 🤣

Why do people do this? I said in the OP that he’s absolutely not.

OP posts:
Calliopespa · 18/07/2025 20:51

MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 20:43

Why do people do this? I said in the OP that he’s absolutely not.

Show quote history

Does it really matter? I thought this was light hearted. Let people have fun with it,

SingleAHF · 18/07/2025 21:01

What is normal, then?

With my last partner we set aside every thursday evening to get onto his or my bed at 8pm and we'd make love for three to four hours.

KellySeveride · 18/07/2025 21:07

SingleAHF · 18/07/2025 21:01

What is normal, then?

With my last partner we set aside every thursday evening to get onto his or my bed at 8pm and we'd make love for three to four hours.

Did you write it in your diary and block out the time on your online calendar too?

Scheduled sex sounds so unsexy

Panterusblackish · 18/07/2025 21:10

Has he not got some housework he could be doing?

yakkity · 18/07/2025 21:10

Imaybeoldbutstillrandy · 18/07/2025 15:09

DH & me quite often disappear into the bedroom for 2 hours, surface, have a drink, something to eat & then go back to it. We spend hours just talking, having a bit of sexual activity-sometimes with 'toys' sometimes enjoying each other's bodies.

Sometimes we don't even bother going to bed - there famous time when DH <who is big rugby fan> missed the 2nd half of an England/Wales match because we found something more interesting do do in half time & just carried on. DH's brother called him to ask what he thought about the match & DH had to admit that he didn't see the second half, didn't know the score & why. 😀

But we're both over the age of 60, no children, only the dog to worry about.

I love our afternoons-going into evenings in bed.

Good grief. 2 hours a break and then more hours?
taking and doing a bit of sex stuff?

What possible sexual activity could last that many hours? Or is it mostly the chatting

Original poster
MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 21:22

Calliopespa · 18/07/2025 20:51

Does it really matter? I thought this was light hearted. Let people have fun with it,

Show quote history

He is a real person. No need to make stuff up about him.

OP posts:
Original poster
MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 21:22

SingleAHF · 18/07/2025 21:01

What is normal, then?

With my last partner we set aside every thursday evening to get onto his or my bed at 8pm and we'd make love for three to four hours.

How on earth do you keep it going for that long?!

OP posts:
dontcomeatme · 18/07/2025 21:26

In my 20s me and my BF at the time were very much into long sessions. Which included everything from foreplay, penetration, toys etc. Now I'm mid 30s with 2 small DC and me and the OH haven't had sex for a good year. Definitely situational 🤣

frecklejuice · 18/07/2025 21:28

Anything over 15 minutes is a waste of my time!

dayslikethese1 · 18/07/2025 21:30

Perhaps he's counting a nap as part of the session time....plus snack break 😆

SunnySideDeepDown · 18/07/2025 21:30

MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 21:22

He is a real person. No need to make stuff up about him.

Show quote history

This is an anonymous online forum. Literally no one cares about your friend, they’re just being silly and having a laugh!

Original poster
MyWarmOchreHare · 18/07/2025 21:31

SunnySideDeepDown · 18/07/2025 21:30

This is an anonymous online forum. Literally no one cares about your friend, they’re just being silly and having a laugh!

Show quote history

Just don’t do it then there won’t be any issue.

OP posts: