To ask - does your partner/husband know how much you earn or what you have in savings?

[MerryPinkCritic]

I’ve been thinking about how open people are with their finances in relationships. Some couples share everything, some keep things separate and some… don’t even ask.

So I’m curious, does your partner know what you earn or how much you’ve saved? Do you think it’s healthy to be totally transparent or is some financial privacy important?

Before I was a sahm he knew roughly how much I got each month. He knows vaguely how much I have in savings too, but a lot is in high risk shares and he's much more conservative in his investments than me so he'd rather not know everything! It fluctuates a lot anyway. If he wanted to know I'd be tell him.

Similarly, I know his earnings and have a vague idea of his savings.

Yes. Our savings have always been regarded as joint even if in one name and we arrange our savings as a couple to be most tax efficient. It makes no sense for someone paying a high rate of tax to have savings in their name if they have a lower earning spouse. I wouldn’t live with someone I couldn’t financially trust

Our finances are totally separate but we are both 2nd relationships & we will never merge finances, we also have quite a significant age difference.
He would have an idea of mine but not the breakdown, I offer the information as it affects our future plans but as long as we can afford to go on holiday he's not bothered.
I know all of his, as I invested it for him but i insisted on talking it through with him so he could understand it

Yes he knows mine and I know his.
We are very financially open. He sees my pension statements and I see his - for future planning. He sees my savings and I see his. etc etc. We both know our respective inheritance positions, too.

Married 8yrs.
Financially transparent for about 15yrs.
Together for 20yrs.

Yes, and I know his. It’s something we have always been open with.

If I felt I needed to I would definitely be able to put money away that he wouldn’t know about.

We know what each other earn. He earns more than me but I am better with money.

I have atleast £10000 in savings which I’ve told him before but I doubt he remembers. I don’t know how much he has, I don’t think I’ve ever asked. But considering he asked to borrow £50 from me last month I’m guessing not a lot. As long as the mortgage and bills are paid I don’t care what he spends his money on. And no way would I ever ask permission from someone to spend my own money!

How do you future plan if you don’t know what your household has in savings?

No neither of us know exactly. We function independently with joint costs shared through a joint account. It's not a secret because neither of us is interested enough to ask. We are financially independent.

Not really. We run our finances separately except for joint expenses from a joint account. I’d tell him if he asked and vice versa but we’re both financially independent with no kids so no need to know details. We both get by okay. If we need to pay for a holiday or something we’ll discuss how much we want to pay for it then split equally. He earns more than me but I work part time so that’s my choice, I’d earn more than him if I was full time, but I don’t know his exact figures. He chooses to work somewhere that pays less but the work is more interesting so we’re both on board with those kind of decisions. Money isn’t a priority.

I think if you have children, childcare costs, financial impact on one earner etc you need to be more conjoined.

Our conversations are along the lines of can we afford this holiday....

We do not live together (although known each other a hell of a long time) and do not share finances or details
I think we probably can guesstimate each others salary within 5-10k due to our jobs
I know he has little savings other than pension as he’s always been a spender - I’m a saver and would not tell him how much
Our different attitudes to money are one of the reasons we do not live together

Haha are you me?! 🤣

Yes to both, he knows what I earn and what I have in savings, but we have separate bank accounts and always will have.

We have joint accounts - he has no idea how much he earns let alone me!! As long as he has money for his hobby, we can go on holiday and he can buy a new golf club when he wants one - he says thats all he needs.

He can access anything at any time and he just doesn’t- I am quite glad really because he is fairly useless with money.

Yep. He knows what's in my sole account, our joint account, my business accounts.
Why wouldn't he?

Nope, DP never asked. We just split expenses down the middle and paid.

He had no idea what I had in savings, nor me him. Pretty lucky we never got married, he went off with another women.

We talk about what we want to do and assume it’s affordable unless one of us says that it’s not.

Yes. We are married, have 2 kids and share a mortgage. All money earned and saved between us is our money.

It’s all jointly accessible here. He doesn’t really know re shares but that’s because he leaves it all to me.

We share everything and know everything.

we are a partnership.

No to both. We don’t discuss finances and don’t need to (we don’t live together).

No. I am more financially savvy than him.

No and No.

Not for any strange reasons,just hasn’t asked!

We do the same. We make plans, in particular we talk about where we want to travel and which festivals we want to go to. If either of us couldn’t afford to do something, we would just say so and we would make different plans. Same if one of us couldn’t get the time off work or has another commitment.

Yes we have complete transparency, we know each others bank log in details and pin numbers. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't feel I could be open about finances.